I have porn induced ED. I was suffering from low self esteem too. I was so bad that i use to watch porn for 2 hrs. I use to do edging for 40mins. I was masturbating 6-7 times a week. I was a DICK.
Well, i understood that my way of releasing sexual tension was wrong when one day, i wasn't able to get hard for a real girl.
I was shocked, in total abyss depression. I finally found a girl on chat and since then my recovery has been good. I use to get a good hard on with her and i finally made myself believe that i was normal.
The bad news is, she no longer chats with me. I had gone back to my dark sexual work of porn watching and masturbating watching it .
I now want to fully recover from my porn fetish.
Hence, here i will be logging my recovery.
Its been 8 days without porn and masturbation.
My balls r heavy and i get a 80% hard thinking abt a sexual fantasy. My hard on doesn't stay the same for more than 2-3 mins. I occasionally stroke my rod during my fantasy.
The only problem is , i feel a deep need for porn or should i say a need to get a very strong hard on which i get watching porn and stroking.
I donot feel very sexual all through out the day. Its just that when i am alone at night and i think about one sexy girl i meet long time ago that i get a 70-80% hard.
I am writing this as my log. I want to recover from my porn addiction and want to be the man i am suppose to be .. fuck girls..not porn.
I am sure there would be few people with the same situation like me here in this forum.
I want them to share their thoughts about how they recovered and how they became better.
I am not doing JP routine right now. I think after 10 days i will start that to check my sexual urges.
I donot fel sexual right now.. i feel thats common when a person is detoxing.
I am 27 yrs of age. I weigh 140 pounds(70 kilos) and i have quit smoking. I know i am on the right path just need fellow companions for this journey to complete recovery and thereafter to a Bigger ... Harder ...and Healthy ROD.