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Help on curing my P.E problem

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  • Help on curing my P.E problem

    My problem all started from when I lost my virginity at 18 years old, however P.E was not the problem the fact that my erection simply went away during foreplay and didnít go up again. So the next time me and my girlfriend had sex all I could think about was having an erection, which was successful but I ejaculated within a 1 minute. Since then I have suffered with P.E Cumming extremely quick after several thrusts basically lasting 1 minute. I would always think about the problem then got use to blocking the issue and put it in the back of my mind, so I never really have attempted on fixing the problem. This P.E happened to me for the three years I was with my girlfriend, and then we split up. I would never ejaculate if she was on top, hand job or bj and when drinking alcohol would last longer. However when I was with her I did also masturbate alot and usually forced myself to cumm quickly. (Which I know could have contributed to the P.E). Itís sad because ever since we split up I have avoided having sex and have not had sexual intercourse with a female for 5 years, simply due to anxiety, lack of confidence and the humiliation. But recently I met a girl and we had sex, which was not planned otherwise I would of avoided and I cummed in 2 minutes. However I believe I cummed due to the fact I was so subconscious about Cumming quick this is what made me ejaculate. I felt I could have lasted much longer.
    On occasion I masturbate once a week and would last for whenever, all depending on the mood I am in. I really need to fix this issue in order to move forward in life and feel more like a man again. I have come to the conclusion that running away from the problem is not going to solve anything. Can anyone give me any advice or guidance on this everlasting issue? All this Kegal, egde etc, Is all knew to me. So im not quite sure where to start. I would highly appreciate the advice. Thanks.

  • #2
    First off this is normal for a young man. You are thinking about it waaaaaaaay to much. I along with millions of others had the same problem and a lot of older men have never gotten over this. One thing I did when I was younger was to MB befor a date . So if it went well it would slow me down. This site has many great tips for this. The best advise I can give is to have sex and enjoy, put everything else out of your mind. You can always go for round two. Nothing says you have to stop having sex after you cum. Slow down, if you feel you are about to cum pull out and suck some titt or kiss her neck, think about your mom I have had sex with many partners, but when I had sex with my wife for the first time, I am not sure I even made a minute. But now it takes me from 15-30 min.


    • #3
      Thank you for your reply, really appreciate the response. I do enjoy the sex, just want to know what would be the most effective thing for me to do? In order to overcome this persistant problem? What would u recommend?


      • #4

        Since you are looking for a recommendation and having explained your situation quite well I would recommend that you start a basic training program in learning to master control over your ejaculation response here:

        For additional study and research on the subject there's a great thread discussing the use of kegels and reverse kegels. It is a long thread with nearly 300 posts but there's much useful advice and discussion for you to digest:

        If the above do not give you a clear understanding of how to get a handle on your arousal and how to tune in to your body's response you might find this thread helpful also:

        The bottom line is that Premature Ejaculation is definitely curable. The cure requires learning and practice. Lots of practice. You will see progress quickly but not overnight. Experiment and learn what works for you and keep coming back here for more advice. Soon you will be telling us what you have learned and then we will be learning from you.

        Best of luck; go for it!


        • #5

          There is a LOT of advice on here, and I even posted a huge thread on my experience. Part of my problem was that I masturbated to porn, got it over quickly, and that manifested itself as PE when having sex. Like you, I finally got fed up of the situation and wanted to do something about it.

          What these forums taught me was to be st one with your body, and understand what it is telling you. Only then can you control it. Personally, I related to having a weak pelvic floor, so immediately got into a routine of doing kegel and reverse kegel exercises. There are many threads and articles here on what these are and how to do the exercises, but trust me...they work. If you suffer from PE like I did, you want to focus initially on just doing reverse kegels. Learn to control and relax that muscle, and when you are masturbating and near the PONR,do a reverse kegel. The sensation of wanting to orgasm will subside and you can probably go on masturbating for quite a while before nearing the next PONR. Slow, deep, steady breathing also helps hugely. Basically, it's all about relaxing, which is exactly what alcohol does, it relaxes you, so you can last longer. It's almost as much a mental thing as a physical thing.

          It can be a different sensation inside a woman, and when she is orgasming herself it can really bring you over the edge, but that's just part of the fun and learning. Sex should be enjoyed, not be worried about. If one day it's over in a couple of minutes, you always have the next day, and the next...

          Good luck!


          • #6
            I also believe that early exposure to porn was instrumental in my sexuality, but, more importantly about premature ejaculation, was growing up in a family that was nosy, with a father who was VERY much against masturbation... With my privacy being intruded on at any moment, (no locks on the doors), I learned to ejaculate ASAP to get the relief I needed as a teenager. I have been trying to recover from this for years now, (with little sympathy from "partners"). Learning how to edge, has been of gift to me in learning self control.

            I am not "anti-porn", but, I do not want to be dependent on it for satisfaction, and I do feel like using it often makes me lazy, and prevents me from being open to a the challenge of a new relationship with a living human being.
            Last edited by actionbuddy; 12-11-2011, 10:18 PM.