In this Ask the Experts section, AJ “Big Al” Alfaro answers questions about maintaining peak sexual stamina. He covers kegels, the butcher broom, the stop and start method for stamina control, and more.
About the Expert: AJ “Big Al” Alfaro
AJ “Big Al” Alfaro has been featured on MSNBC, CNN, Salon.com, The “Jon Melichar Show,” The Boston Phoenix, PE Magazine, AltPenis Research, Weekly Wire, and Men’s Wellness News. He is the author of several books, guides and newsletters, including “For Men Only.” You can learn more about his consultation services at Male Enhancement Coach.
QUESTION: “Could I do kegels for sexual stamina without an erection. . .
Also, I purchased the “Penis Exercises” book by the editors of PEGym.com (figured there would be a lot of information). There is a description of a Kegel, the Kegel slam – slowly contract the pelvic floor muscles for over 5 seconds, then hold the contraction for 5 seconds, then slowly release over 5 seconds. I tried it a couple of times, and it seems to help control the muscles. I would like to incorporate some of these.”
Big Al: Actually, since you can do 50 of the erect Kegels, you CAN move on to more challenging exercises.
You can do the Kegel Slam, if you’d like, or the towel raise or Super Kegel. However, Kegels should be done with an erection for maximum effect.
You can do these exercises without an erection, but they’ll be much less challenging and productive.
Q: “Where can I buy the ‘butchers broom‘ for sexual stamina . . .
. . . and do you think that will help speed up the healing process? I can’t lie; the name sounds a bit dangerous, but if you think it will help with my situation, I’ll give it a shot!”
Big Al: Any nutrition or health food store should have butcher’s broom, and you can find a lot of stores selling it online. It also goes under the name “Ruscogenin”. It’s usually very inexpensive, and I haven’t heard of anything harmful happening to clients that have taken it.
Q: “Should I fantasize when doing the ‘stop and start’ . . .
. . . or am I supposed to masturbate without fantasizing? This might be a stupid question, but obviously I could go for a lot longer if I’m not fantasizing and not sure if that’s the purpose.”
Big Al: The drawback to fantasizing is that it can set you up for negative conditioning- meaning that you’ll crave the type of stimulation that the scenario your fantasize about in order to become fully aroused. It would be better to avoid direct sexual imagery while you’re training so that you can focus solely on the sensations that you’re experiencing. That way, you can condition yourself to approach lovemaking in a completely receptive manner.
You should visualize yourself performing with a feeling of ultimate confidence. The goal is to be able to “lose” yourself to the passion of the moment. Learn to capture the “feel” of that particular sensation and retrieve it when you feel the need for a confidence boost.
Q: “I’m hanging weights and have a comfort question . . .
. . . I would like to know what I can use to protect my penis and to increase comfort while hanging. I’ve heard good things about silicone gel. Where can I find silicone gel in strip form? What is the brand name? Can I get it at WalMart or a drug store? I would love to try it. With the right wrap, I believe I can hang over 30 pounds without a problem. I am anxious to try this.”
Big Al: You can go to any supermarket or drugstore and find silicone gel in the section for foot care, in the form of insoles. In some store’s medical sections, they sell silicone gel in strips. Some brands include Dr. Scholl’s and Pedifix. Theraband is also a good alternative to the gel.
Q: Do you have recommendations on how many reps to use for the beginner’s course?
Big Al: For jelqs, if you’re new to them, I’d suggest starting at about 25 slow, well-formed reps. Don’t focus so much on the pressure or intensity as much as the FEEL of the exercise.
Concentrate on each singular rep and VISUALIZE your penis getting larger and yourself feeling more confident as you do them. The visualization part might seem silly to some, but it’s extremely important! The OM exercise is done as one series. For Kegels, try to do 5-10 reps (erect). For the Stop and Start exercise, try to get to at least 10 minutes.