some questions regarding EQ and EQ related matters

[Schizm Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Schizm]

so I've been actively trying to improve my EQ for the past month or so and by actively trying,I mean exercising,adopting a kegelling routine for EQ,watch what I eat and drink(mostly green tea) and also trying to stay off porn and masturbate without it.


and I suppose I had some progress.

I get morning boners every morning now and I've learned to not rely on porn for my erections,also it feels harder when erect but kinda starts going soft fast when not touching it.

so I ask myself...why don't I get hard when I'm making out with my girl!?
it's very strange...I can feel precum just gush out but I stay completely soft...I just dont know why.

the same thing happens when I'm kegelling.
I don't get hard when kegelling but if I do it for 4-5 minutes non stop or something,some precum comes out.

I seem to get hard only with manual stimulation and even then it takes some time.


I just don't know what to think.
I started doing this kegelling routine and worrying about EQ when I couldn't perform a month ago.
https://www.pegym.com/articles/detra...egative-habits
but without the edging after kegelling part

I know this is mostly attributed to worrying about EQ and performing when the time comes but what can I do to get past my physical shortcomings?
maybe then I won't have to worry so much about my mental shortcomings.

also,how long would it take to improve EQ from a passable 7 to a rocky 9?

[closed224 Senior Member Member of the Month Dec 2014, Feb 2017 Find all posts View Profile Close closed224]

It sounds like you have broken the link between porn and your brain. Now do Plateua edging to retrain your body as to what you expect. Bad habits need to be replaced with good ones.

[Schizm Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Schizm]

plateua edging?

what is that?

just regular edging?

ok I searched for it and I can say that I don't have any issues with premature ejaculation.

I can masturbate till I reach my PONR and because I know its coming,I stop,let it cool off and start again.

I've actually been doing this since I started pe back in 2012

when masturbating to porn I can go for more than an hour,reaching PONR each time and letting it subside.

now when I do it without porn,I don't really do that (because I guess its not as "fun" as with porn?) and just go over the line after about 20-30 minutes or so.

[closed224 Senior Member Member of the Month Dec 2014, Feb 2017 Find all posts View Profile Close closed224]

https://www.pegym.com/forums/prematu...aculation.html

[TheZZMan Moderator Member of the Month Sept 2018PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close TheZZMan]

One word - Relax! Your brain will trick you into not being able to achieve an erection if you are over worried about it. So your intense focus on ED is actually causing your ED. Trust me, I deal with this regularly as my brain is overactive. Focus on her and let your unit focus on itself. Takes some training but it does work.

[Schizm Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Schizm]

I think that's the problem too zzman and will try to work on it as best as I can but I need to make sure my body's in top shape too.

I've also updated my previous reply because I searched but maybe you missed that so I'll just copy paste here again







ok I searched for it and I can say that I don't have any issues with premature ejaculation.

I can masturbate till I reach my PONR and because I know its coming,I stop,let it cool off and start again.

I've actually been doing this since I started pe back in 2012

when masturbating to porn I can go for more than an hour,reaching PONR each time and letting it subside.

now when I do it without porn,I don't really do that (because I guess its not as "fun" as with porn?) and just go over the line after about 20-30 minutes or so.

[closed224 Senior Member Member of the Month Dec 2014, Feb 2017 Find all posts View Profile Close closed224]

I am referring to the fact you push precum out with no stimulation and no erection. This sounds to me like you have over tightened your pelvic floor to the point leveling and arousal are skipping the part where your penis gets hard. Direct manual stimulation needed for erection isn't too alarming. In fact it is fairly common. But beginning the ejaculation process with no stimulation and no erection is a little alarming.

I think you should work to reconnect the arousal process into your erections. Maybe stimulate your penis while making out. So it gets used to becoming hard at that time. Also work on reverse kegels and Hindu squats other stretching excersizes for a tight PF. Focus on getting your erection back in play, and relaxing.

[Schizm Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Schizm]

I'm going to check out those exercises...is there any particular routine the reverse kegels can be implemented?

should I still do the kegel routine?

I should also add that masturbating without porn doesnt give me any precum till I'm close to cumming,but masturbating with porn always had a few drops here and there when I wasn't close to cumming.

could it be that I'm really just too excited when I'm with her?

would it help if I stroked it a bit at random times during the day without the intention to cum just to get used to getting erect?

because I'm really not getting any random boners during the day or anything like that...you could say I got hard only when I wanted to masturbate or in some special cases where I saw something sexy or was very horny.

[domnus Senior Member Member of the Month Dec 2016 Find all posts View Profile Close domnus]

Schism, If you are masterbating until you reach PONR and then stopping the stimulation to let the urge to orgasm subside, then starting again it sounds more like you are doing stop/starts. The next progression to edging would be to not completely stop the stimulation but instead slow down, maybe back off your glans but learning to back away from PONR while the stimulation is ongoing.
This is the primary key to edging in my opinion. And that is why its called edging, learning to ride the edge of PONR without completely stopping the stimulation.
I agree with Wishful, that you should begin working on hindi squats and yoga poses to decrease the tightness in you pelvic floor that you seem to have. Those exercises are good for helping you become more aware of what is happening in you pelvic floor, thus allowing you to work toward the pelvic floor balance which is important for good EQ and PONR control.

[Schizm Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Schizm]

ok....next time I masturbate,I'll try to slow down and hold the feeling there instead of stopping...I think I do that without noticing sometimes so I won't have too much trouble with it.

yoga to help with erections?
really?!
that sounds kinda funny but I'll at least try to work on that hindi squat since it also looks like a good exercise to strengthen legs and back.

I'll also do reverse kegels at random parts of the day and also jerk it a bit just to get hard for no reason.

should I keep doing the kegels or should I stop that?

I'd also like to say a big thank you to you guys,you've helped me a lot to understand what's going on and how to go about solving the problems!

[closed224 Senior Member Member of the Month Dec 2014, Feb 2017 Find all posts View Profile Close closed224]

Stop keels for 3 weeks. Do the yoga stretches and Reverse Kegels. Then when you add Kegels back in do 25% Kegels to 75% Reverse Kegels. Slowly change that ratio until doing 50 50 50. Strong but balanced pelvic floor is the goal here.

[Schizm Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Schizm]

ok,report so far.

I've stopped kegels.

whenever I use the bathroom I pull on it a little to get hard just to get the blood moving there more frequently.

I also do 6-7 hindi squats after I wash my hands...I found that that's a good way to keep doing them because you don't forget about it and at the end of the day,the total squat count is around 40-50 or so and I think that's ok for someone who hasn't squatted in his life and is a little too much on the untrained side

I also do reverse kegels when I'm sitting down at random times.

I read somewhere to try do reverse kegels when masturbating and see what happens...well,I did that and I'm not sure what should have happened.
is it supposed to make you get less excited so you can last longer or so?