Performance Anxiety

[hilikus Member Find all posts View Profile Close hilikus]

HI I've been doing Pe for roughly 3 weeks now and got to say that I am liking it so far. I haven't measured yet to see if I have gained anything but I can feel a difference with the constant super hard erections. Anyway on to my issue it seems to that I have a issue with maintaining my erections with new women. Whenever its that time for us to do it I lose my erection within seconds and can't perform. I know what my issue is and it is that I get nervous and feel like I can't satisfy the women. This a on going issue and in the past what I have done to resolve this issue is to purchase Viagra and then I would perform pretty darn well. But I am still young and I dont want to have to rely on the use of Viagra right now. I was wondering if maybe PE can help with this issue even though it is more of a psychological problem. Or maybe you guys had some suggestions for this. Im not sure if this is the right forum for this so I apolgize if it isnt.

[NP97 Retired ModeratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close NP97]

That sounds almost 100% mental. Try some edging for stamina work. Try relaxing a bit more as well. It's just sex. If you can't get it up, go down.

[larrypinball Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close larrypinball]

How old are you hilikus?

[MrBigDick Retired ModeratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close MrBigDick]

It sounds mental to me as well. I think you're worried about how you'll be perceived by these "new" women and that is placing added pressure on you to perform well. I know it's easier said than done, but try and focus on just enjoying the sex versus thinking about how you're being judged and you should do fine.

[hilikus Member Find all posts View Profile Close hilikus]

thanks for the suggestions, i am in my early 20's and i have no problem maintaining a erection during masturbation but when it comes down to it I get so nervous and it just flops. I have tried to focus on the sex but my mind is hard to control at times espically at high stress haha but I will try harder.

[Panther Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Panther]

No worries. I had this problem too and, the great thing is, it's only on your first performance event. I beat it by just conditioning myself to think how much they are going to love it. I'm sure yuor past girlfriends had no problems with you after you got through the initial nervousness.

I bet you can remember some of the best sex you've had. That's what you need to see and hear when you are with a new girl for the first time. Go for it - just imagine in your head how much she'll want you on the 2nd, 3rd, 4th time and pretend the first time is the 5th time.

[marzotron Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close marzotron]

I remember when i was having this problem, just no matter what you do or think seems to make you able to maintain an erection. I just had to just be a bit out of character and act that little more confident with what i was doing.

[Big Al AdministratorPEGym EditorMale Enhancement Coach Rep.PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close Big Al]

Here are some related posts that may help:

https://www.pegym.com/forums/erectil...pills-etc.html

https://www.pegym.com/forums/erectil...ve-sex-ed.html

https://www.pegym.com/forums/gym/953...onfidence.html

[hilikus Member Find all posts View Profile Close hilikus]

Psychological ED comes from taking sex too seriously. Contrary to what movies, magazines, and TV shows put out, you're not taking someone to bed to try and "impress" them- you're there to enjoy each other and to have fun!

So what if you don't perform your best each time- so what? Good sex usually comes with time. If you have a partner that truly cares about you (and you care about them in return), this will be understood and the pressure should dissipate.

Now, if you're only having sex for recreational purposes, then the emotional aspect doesn't matter- in which case, there should be even less pressure to perform if you can look at it from a logical point of view. This is easier said than done, but if you can train yourself to think of sex as something enjoyable (as it should be) and less of a "test", your anxiety will eventually go away.-BIg Al

Strong words my friend thanks for the adivce, this statement made me realy put things in perspective.

[Big Al AdministratorPEGym EditorMale Enhancement Coach Rep.PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close Big Al]

Strong words my friend thanks for the adivce, this statement made me realy put things in perspective.

Glad to help

Many societies seem to stick to one extreme or the other regarding "sex"- either it's a taboo subject that shouldn't be discussed openly, or it's touted as a potentially carefree activity that should be pursued with little regard to feelings and consequences. This latter opinion is where most modern societies are at, and it's been allowed to morph into something that now seems to be negatively affecting the self-esteem of many, many individuals.

Why not a third, more reasonable, less extreme option. When people can view themselves and other people as people and not merely sex objects, there won't be as many cases of negative body image issues and low self esteem.

[MrBigDick Retired ModeratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close MrBigDick]

The first time I was with my now ex gf wasn't that great. She gave me a blow job and I managed to cum. But, when we tried to have sex, it just didn't get off the ground. So, I went to this adult store and they had these all herbal pills that were supposedly herbal forms of viagra. So, knowing I was going to see her that night as she was house sitting, I bought one and tried it.

That night when we went to the bedroom, within minutes I got a raging hard on. I read the ingredients and this thing was nothing more than what's in the supplements we take for PE. I fucked her not once but twice that night. Both times I got raging hard ons. After that, no worries.

The gf before her, we started having "fun" again but with her, it was different. I knew her and she knew me and the minute we went into the bedroom, it took me nothing to get a full boner and to be able to get down to business.

[Ethan-T Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Ethan-T]

... herbal forms of viagra.

Can you tell me what these herbs were? - or the name of the product please?

[clubdeac Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close clubdeac]

I too have developed severe performance anxiety. When I was in a comfortable relationship I as a stallion and had sex daily. After that relationship ended I suffered from performance anxiety off and on and eventually quit trying. I'm still in my 30's!! After a year of complete abstinence, I recently gained the courage to started trying again. I had two successful attempts with Cialis and then a failure with 20mg Cialis last weekend. She was understanding but now I'm afraid to try again. This has literally been destroying my life - depression/anxiety etc. Any suggestions on what I should tell her?? Should I just be completely open and honest and see if she understands? Any suggestions/help would be more than appreciated. Everything in me wants to run away from the relationship but I know the only way to get over this is keep trying

[Big Al AdministratorPEGym EditorMale Enhancement Coach Rep.PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close Big Al]

I too have developed severe performance anxiety. When I was in a comfortable relationship I as a stallion and had sex daily. After that relationship ended I suffered from performance anxiety off and on and eventually quit trying. I'm still in my 30's!! After a year of complete abstinence, I recently gained the courage to started trying again. I had two successful attempts with Cialis and then a failure with 20mg Cialis last weekend. She was understanding but now I'm afraid to try again. This has literally been destroying my life - depression/anxiety etc. Any suggestions on what I should tell her?? Should I just be completely open and honest and see if she understands? Any suggestions/help would be more than appreciated. Everything in me wants to run away from the relationship but I know the only way to get over this is keep trying

If you trust her then being open can't hurt. Take your time and begin by engaging in activities which allow for an erection yet don't cause anxieties. Do your best to allow your libido to build until you can push the boundaries with your activities.

The above should be helpful assuming there's no physical component at work and that you're not engaging in negative activities like frivolous masturbation.

[vpwantsbig Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close vpwantsbig]

Clubdeac

First thing I would do is to stop depending on any kind of external dependencies like meditation, strong vitamin.

Second to boost your inner confidence which have to come from within is in you, not outside. In other words, fix body mind holistically.

Dump all medications. Join immediately yoga and meditation program nearest to your place. Find a one that is less commercialized yoga like art of living. YOGA is for the body and Meditation is for the mind. Both goes hand in hand. This will fix you holistically..IMHO one of the best way...if u ask my strong opinion, that's the only way.

You will see a tremendous change in ur body and mind.....

When the mind is strong, everything will fall in place....you will never get NEGATIVE THOUGHTS.

Then of course SEX...GREAT SEX...GREAT ERECTIONS..

how much time does it take...universal answer it depends...but it won't be months...

Start is half done.
Good luck.