Another bad experience

[Drax Member Find all posts View Profile Close Drax]

So using my fcked up judgement I decided I wanted to practise having sex (ala one night stand) and there was this super fat girl that was in my area, so I thought what the hell.

My erections are going great, had not masturbated in a month, had not looked at porn for more than that. Just texting over Whatsapp and I had very strong erections. Fast forward, in bed, erections still great. Time to do the deed - went in, couldn't penetrate much because of her weight - sheer size of her legs prevented me from going very deep.

Anyways, I slipped out. Once that happened that was it. Couldn't get another erection. I had to wait another 15 minutes ... tried again, couldn't find her opening (she's very, very large). Dick went soft again.

As soon as I get my erection ... I'm finding they subside far too quickly that if I don't find the mark within a few seconds or I slip out because I want to change positions my erections go down too quickly. Then I have the problem that once the erections go it takes me 15-20 minutes sometimes more to regain it.

None of this feels normal to me. I'm 35, in great shape - I exercise regularly. Anyways, we just talked in bed for the remainder, I felt like shit. So I don't know where to go from here.

As soon as I got home I was so depressed I just masturbated to images to get some kind of release. This is such a vicious cycle and I wish I knew what I had to do to overcome it.

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

Sounds to me like you wern't attracted to the girl.

[Drax Member Find all posts View Profile Close Drax]

To add insult to injury I suffer from delayed ejaculation (I can orgasm within 2 minutes to images, but never with a woman having intercourse). So all of these issues have taken a toll on me on a psychological level.

I don't know what to do.

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

I had DE i know it's a bitch .

[Drax Member Find all posts View Profile Close Drax]

Sounds to me like you wern't attracted to the girl.

It's very possible that was THE cause or it was A cause, but my biggest concern is that I don't want this happening when I'm with a girl I like. I have a date next week with a very nice girl, but I'm worried these issues are going to trickle down.

I abstained from porn for about 2 months. I stopped masturbation ... I assumed that if I stop, my brain would rewire itself so the whole delayed ejaculation would fix itself. I get erections, very hard erections during the way just from texting alone ... so I know I have erections and can get them. I NEVER get morning wood though. I don't wake up from strong erections - but when I get them in the morning they last much much longer than normal.

I can say to myself - maybe if I abstained from porn for 6 months these issues would go away, but 6 months is a long time and it's also possible it may not have any effect in my case.

[Drax Member Find all posts View Profile Close Drax]

I had DE i know it's a bitch .

Right now I'm just trying to fix one thing at a time. One person told me on another forum that I should not masturbate for at least 2-3 months as by then my brain would rewrite itself. Another person told me that abstaining from masturbation won't actually do a damn thing.

So... I have no idea what will or won't work, and time is the only variable that I can try right now. I suppose the erection issues are far more damning to me than the delayed ejaculation so if I had to pick a poison, it would be to address that first.

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

Have you had a hormone test?

Anxiety is heavily implicated in all these issues you are having including De . Like i said I had de .

[Drax Member Find all posts View Profile Close Drax]

Have you had a hormone test?

Anxiety is heavily implicated in all these issues you are having including De . Like i said I had de .

Nope. No hormone test - I haven't been to a doctor to have any tests done. I thought if I give it a little time that my issues would fix themselves, but clearly they haven't

[Drax Member Find all posts View Profile Close Drax]

Must I go to a Urologist or just a normal doctor to have the tests done? And what specific tests must I ask them to perform? Just a hormone test? Anything else?

[Big Al AdministratorPEGym EditorMale Enhancement Coach Rep.PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close Big Al]

You're not going to perform well if you're attempting to perform with anxiety. As long as the concern is on performance instead of your enjoying yourself, there's going to be issue. You must learn to remove thoughts of performance from your mind, relax, and just enjoy the experience. Do this enough times and the positive conditioning effect will set in- and the issue will be resolved.

This process can be greatly accelerated by working with a trusted sexual partner- preferably one you're actually attracted to.

[Drax Member Find all posts View Profile Close Drax]

You're not going to perform well if you're attempting to perform with anxiety. As long as the concern is on performance instead of your enjoying yourself, there's going to be issue. You must learn to remove thoughts of performance from your mind, relax, and just enjoy the experience. Do this enough times and the positive conditioning effect will set in- and the issue will be resolved.

This process can be greatly accelerated by working with a trusted sexual partner- preferably one you're actually attracted to.

If anything I would have assumed I had less anxiety because this woman was not the prettiest and well, very, very large. So I don't think I was nervous. And how would I know if I had anxiety? I didn't feel like it last night, I just got irritated when my erections subsided and couldn't regain them.

How do you test for that (anxiety)? And what could I do to eliminate it as a potential variable?

[WaT30 Member Find all posts View Profile Close WaT30]

Well, the obvious advice is, don't have one night stands with fat chicks. I don't think it's worth having sex with someone you're not even attracted too ffs.

About your date, just relax and if you'll have sex with her, don't stress yourself. Even if it doesn't go well, you shouldn't stress about it. If she's a suitable partner in the first place, she won't make a fuss about it.

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

I can tell by your posts you have anxiety ,how to fix can be problematic . Personally I do yoga .

The standard doc can order blood tests . So total testosterone ,estrogen etc the standard hormone test . Get free testosterone tested if you can get it done by sensitive measure.

[Drax Member Find all posts View Profile Close Drax]

I can tell by your posts you have anxiety ,how to fix can be problematic . Personally I do yoga .

The standard doc can order blood tests . So total testosterone ,estrogen etc the standard hormone test . Get free testosterone tested if you can get it done by sensitive measure.

You can't tell by text. How do you differentiate between anxiety and let's say, sheer frustration? Because I'm frustrated, not anxious. When I was in bed with this woman I wasn't anxious. I was calm.

So one can't keep throwing the anxious line out there everything someone has a problem.

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

You can't tell by text. How do you differentiate between anxiety and let's say, sheer frustration? Because I'm frustrated, not anxious. When I was in bed with this woman I wasn't anxious. I was calm.

So one can't keep throwing the anxious line out there everything someone has a problem.

Do you mean everytime ? Stress can cause this style of error .
Sometimes stress is such a part of life one doesn't recognise it.