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Need help defining the reason for ED

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  • Need help defining the reason for ED

    Ok. I had my only relationship in life, 13 years together, ending few months ago. I started dating new woman, but I can't get my dick working and it's killing me. I copy paste from my own thread from relationship forum:

    God damn my dick has worked like shit both times. Difficulty of having erection and losing it, even if I took 100mg viagra. Then finally succeeded to make it work and cum both times. But it has been very shitty sex because of that. It is probably because of tension. And I started to fear that it won't work so it makes it worse. 13-years, whole life with one woman. It feels weird to have sex with someone else. Also I have had huge anxiety from family braking apart. It is very discouraging and unmanly feeling when smoking hot woman wants you badly and you cannot deliver. I have been last 3 months on isotretinoin (accutane) 20mg/day (low dose) and started to wonder if that has something to do with this, but I have used the drug before and at least with viagra I have worked well as I remember. I stopped taking it now. Also my TRT protocol changed so estrogen might be out of balance. Gotta ged bloodwork done. That's bad that I can't trust that dick works even with viagra. That's very frightening that even with ED drugs it won't work. With my ex it worked 95% time very well. Then I wasn't on isotretinoin though. It's whole different level of self-confidence when you have now doubt if your dick works.

    Last night I was with her again and same shit. Working very badly. In the end could penetrate and have sex for like 5 mins and that was it. Shitty sex, compared to fucking great 20-30 min penetration time sessions I used to have with my wife.

    So there is;
    quite recent divorce
    isotretinoin
    change in TRT protocol

    I will get bloodwork done and adjust trt protocol. I have stopped accutane, I hope that didn't do any permanent/long term damage to erection. I have tooked 2 courses before, the last one was 2 years ago and I have had very fucking good erections after that. So I would assume if it cause something I will recover from it this time too.

    Allthought I don't feel like I'm nervous when we (try) to have sex, maybe I am nervous. Last time I drank 3 beers just to relax before sex. It didn't help much.

    What do you guys suggest?

  • #2
    Go to your doctor he can help you out with this problem better then anyone here can.

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    • #3
      Originally posted by Interceptor View Post
      Go to your doctor he can help you out with this problem better then anyone here can.
      Booked doctor today.

      Right now sitting on computer writing this I've very hard boner and it has been for like 10 mins. Without touching just thinking that new lady. So penis works sometimes at some circumstances. Something strange is going on.

      Edit: and now again I've had a fucking great boner for at least 10 mins just sitting in front of computer. I took my testosterone shot yesterday so maybe test and estrogen are now on sweet spot..
      Trapezius
      Senior Member
      Last edited by Trapezius; 11-28-2018, 04:02 AM.

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      • #4
        Doctor prescribed caverject to gain my confidence. Today penis feels all over better, more sensitive and easier erection.

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        • #5
          It's very likely you haven't been able to fully enjoy sex due to all of the negative thoughts you've attached to it. When the prospect of sex becomes fraught with anxiety, this can outweigh any potential excitement you'd get from the activity.

          You may not be emotionally prepared to begin engaging in an intimate relationship. To be sure, almost any potential partner you meet is going to have a past. Unless you learn to accept this then the problems will remain.
          Want a FREE Month of Coaching? PM or email me for details- or CLICK HERE

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          • #6
            Yesterday we had sex and erection was ok. Today again very strong erections by myself. There is nothing wrong, but temporarily something was off.

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            • #7
              I had a breakup once. It was someone i was with for 6 years. I couldnt even get hard or wasnt even interested in sex (jerking too) for half a year. A breakup of a 13 year marriage is not going to be easy on your brain, which plays the biggest role in your crotch. My doctor just pointed to the brain when I was freaking out, didn't even entertain any other idea. You sound the same.... anxiety, depression, breakup... all chemicals going thru your brain.

              Eventually I just moved on. I found a rebound that I got feelings for and it removed my emotional attachment to my ex. It is hard as you associate everything good about sex with your ex... after all, you two know how to work each other best and turn each other on best. I am sure you already know ways to really get rid of that person from your mind. But id like to remind you to not freak out. By the sounds of it your dick was working with your ex, now its not. Nothing changed, but one big fat factor. All in the mind my man. By the sounds of it you think wwaaaaaaayyy too much, and we all do... millions of thoughts pass thru our brain a second, during sex you have to bring that down to only a few.

              For me, i shut down my brain during sex and let my dick go on autopilot. keeps me rock hard the entire time and also removes boundaries you make up. Leaving it all to just a fun and messy hot sexy session. Make sex fun. Relax. Just remember you both are there to pleasure each others bodies.
              Start 6inches bpel -> today 8.75 BPEL. 20.5 years old-25
              "Everyone wants to get big but nobody wants to lift heavy"

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              • #8
                Very good post auriez. That's exactly whats going on. Nothing physically wrong, but it's all in the mind.

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                • #9
                  I used Caverject few days ago. It was no big deal injecting my penis as I've injected testosterone to my muscles hundreds of times. It gave me erection but also gave me PAIN in penis. Never use that again.

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                  • #10
                    I have had sex 3 times with second woman after divorce. Two times worked ok with 10 mg cialis and 50 mg viagra, but third time there was problems. eventually it worked though.

                    There is no change I could ever have sex without ed drugs at this point. For most of my life I didnt need drugs and dick was working almost 100 % of times when needed. Then I was out of shape and little overweight when I passed 30 year mark. Erection still worked but wasn't as hard. I never done any PE. Then 2,5 years ago I got mentally sick, ocd-like thoughts of my wife having sex with other man who has huge cock. I don't remember was it before or after this when I started using viagra. It was first because I wanted to be rock hard and perform. I also went to testosterone replacement therapy then. I remember that I started PE right away when mental problem started. Bib hanger for 6 months followed by manual pe and extender usage. Bib hanger was hard to my dick and damaged skin and caused swelling etc. Terrible. But I don't think it is cause to this ED because I have had at least 90 % success rate with my wife with viagra and usually 9-10/10 EQ.

                    Now I can't even trust ED drugs and it destroys self-confidence. I would like to get back where I don't need any drugs for regular sex. I am on trt and estrogen level is crucial for erection. That I must check again that dosages are right.

                    But what other things you guys suggest? Therapy to talk performance anxiety? Some exercises to boost EQ? Jelqing, edging, hindi squats? My EQ without drugs is not very good when masturbating/morning wood. My diet should be ok and I go to gym regularly.

                    Good I'm jealous to guys that have bullet proof erection. Meaning you don't even have though that your dick won't work. Like at least 95 % of my aged guys seem to be like that. I used to be like that with my wife, but most guys can do it with any woman. It is such a good feeling and good self-esteem boost when you don't have anything to worry about. Your dick just automatically Works like it should when sex is expected.

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                    • #11
                      Can we say that hanging can't be reason for my ED because I stopped it 2 years and since then have had rock hard boners and best sex sessions of my life. Allthough with ed drugs, but dick has worked without them too.

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                      • #12
                        Last night my penis worked again 100 %. Had sex multiple times. At first I did not get erection and I was thinking "not again", but then I got into zone and it started working and worked all night.

                        But I was in huge amount of drugs to get my confidence and ability up.
                        -10mg cialis
                        -50mg viagra
                        -Vitaros 3mg/ml

                        My TRT plan is messed up as I switched to another, long acting drug Nebido. I haven't yet took lab samples but I feel my libido is not where it used to be. And I inject these extra doses and randomly take aromatase inhibitor to balance estrogen.

                        -4 hours before sex I injected 25 mg of Testosterone base (very fast acting testosterone)
                        -2 hours before I injected again 25 mg

                        I have to get my TRT plan fixed so estrogen stays at sweet spot. That I believe is big part of problem along with mental head issues/performance anxiety.

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                        • #13
                          Hi T, Why the drugs? try getting along without them then your know how your body is really working, the drugs could be masking a problem.

                          But I think you real problem has be more down to first night frights, its your brain its giving you anxiety problems and even with drugs you wont perform, try this when it to sex just get naked with your women get into bed and relax and take things slowly lots of foreplay but not sex save that for last let her slow masturbate you and if you ejaculate, stop and go for it again no matter how long it takes, but also enjoy her body as well get her to orgasm with your tongue, that's a great libido lifter, but do try and keep of the ED drugs.

                          NOWHARD

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                          • #14
                            ED drugs are mainly for confidence. Without them I begin to think that my penis is not going to work.

                            That works what you described that we lay relaxed next to eachother and take it slow. And when I see it's working I relax even more and get into zone and relax and enjoy.

                            I will slowly go down in drugs so that it's only 25 mg viagra and then nothing. I have done that kind of withdrawal in my twenties. Didn't even notice performance difference when I dropped from 25 mg viagra to nothing.

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                            • #15
                              Stopped reading when you mentioned Accutane.

                              Yeah, i`m pretty sure it's the accutane. These new modern medicines mess with your brain.

                              You have to wait until it recovers, and do plenty of sport diet meditation and hardcore cardio. My advice

                              All the best

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