EDIT: I have been lurking here for years, joined this year and tried everything I read on here and finally found a solution I believe for me. I also now only do PE about once a week, just a good 30-50 jelqs. I used to do 45 minute long routines 3 or 4 times a week, stopped fully when the erection problems came, and just recently started the super easy once a week workout after having solid erections for a while now.
I went through a whirlwind the last year and a half with my EQ. I always had ridiculously hard erections that would come from simply kissing a girl or cuddling. Then one night with a girl, nothing happened, even with self stimulation. It felt like my penis was dead or not even there. It was very embarrassing and from this point on I couldn't get more than 75% hard even with porn, and if I stopped physical stimulation my erection would be gone in seconds.
I had a few more instances where I couldn't get it up and then started avoiding opportunities for sex because I didn't want to experience the humiliation of not being able to perform.
After a year and a half of trial and error, I confidently feel like I am 98% cured. And that last 2% is the fact that though they still come easy it seems erections don't come quite as instantaneously as they did before and libido is a little lower than I remember before that night above. However this could be due to getting older, I just turned 32.
I will explain what worked for me, but first I want to address no fap.
After not being able to get it up, I went on the internet and discovered no porn/no fap. I was always a at least once, usually 2-3 times a day masturbation with porn. So this got my attention. My first attempt I made it 65 days. Had a week of masturbating but no porn. Then I did 93 successful days. I still can't say whether this helped or hurt, but lean towards the latter.
My opinion, is that no fap/ no porn is not a good thing unless you have a serious problem, like hours a day to weird, disturbing porn. I was at 1-3 times a day to sometimes just pictures but otherwise normal, just a guy and girl going at it or 2 girls, or a girl solo. Why I think it can be detrimental is based on personal experience and some reading on the brain. During the end and after no fap I could once again get close to 90% erections but they would still disappear after seconds if manual stimulation was stopped. What changed though was that prior to no fap, though I couldn't get good erections I still mentally felt really horny all the time. After no fap, I could get decent erections and keep them if stimulation was kept up, however my libido and sex drive were GONE. I felt nothing when I saw a hot girl on TV or in the street. Had no desire for sex, to look at porn or masturbate. I basically made myself get off occasionally after I completed no fap. Kind of a catch-22.
Why I think no fap is a bad thing unless you have a serious problem ties in with some brain research. I won't get detailed so you can look it up, but basically when a person does something over and over again 'grooves' form in the brain making it subsequently easier for those types of neural connections to fire. If you complain all the time, it becomes easier to be negative and complain and harder to be positive. If you practice the same song on piano over and over the song gets easier to where you don't even have to think about it. Vice versa as well. My theory is that no fap did the opposite, making my sexual/horny neural connections rusty, thus I never felt that strong libido I had before.
But that's kind of off topic, if no fap works for you...awesome, it didn't for me.
So, here is what did work.
1. Reverse kegels. Leading up to that one night where everything to do with my erection changed I was doing a ton of super hard, long hold normal kegels because I knew I was going to have sex with this super hot girl I met, so I wanted my erection to be as good as possible (I'll talk about this state of mind later). I noticed after that night something didn't feel right in my pc/bc muscle area. It felt really tight, annoying almost painfully tight for pretty much a year.
So I found out about reverse kegels and started doing 100% reverse kegels only. At first I could hold them for maybe 10 seconds, but I worked up to doing 5 reps of 30 seconds spread throughout the day. After a couple weeks of No normal kegels only reverse, my erection quality improved greatly. So I kept at it. At about the 6 week mark I noticed erection quality starting to fade again. But kept up the reverse kegel only workout figuring there would be ups and downs in this recovery. I did reverse kegels only for about 3 months, around 5 30 second holds thoughout the day, 3-4 days a week. My erection was improved to about 80-85% and would remain longer with no stimulation, however this started to get worse after a while on the reverse kegel only workout.
Here I had sex a few times and it took manual stimulation to get hard, but once I was in I had no problem keeping it up, but still at about 75% quality. However, I noticed I could last forever. Before the erection problems, I got to where I could last a long time (from edging work) but it took a lot of mental discipline and effort so to speak and I would have the occasional 2 minute 'oops'. So I think reverse kegels are the answer to pre-ejac.
2. Regular kegels. At this point I stopped the reverse kegels but was afraid to do normal kegels because I didn't want that permanent tension in my pc muscle to return. But after a while I figured I had nothing to lose so I started doing really light, 10 second holds a few times a week. This definitely helped, I was at close to 90% after a couple weeks.
My theory is that I somehow messed up my pc/bc muscles from doing the super hard overtraining kegels. The reverse kegels helped this, and then doing reverse kegels only for so long, which actually made my erection worse, ultimately helped to get my pc/bc muscles healed and rid of the chronic tension. though it made them weak, thus starting up regular kegels after a sufficient amount of time spent relaxing them with reverse kegels. So I had to go backwards to go forward so to speak.
3. This one was a huge piece of the puzzle, something I interestingly can't find too much info on with regards to males, however a girl told me it is a fundamental part of her kundalini yoga practice but everything I find online talks about it in regards to females only.
It is the 'Root Lock'. Basically like doing a kegel with your anus. Squeezing it as if you wanted to hold in a fart.
After starting these, just 2-3 30 second holds a few times a week, I got a sensation I haven't had in a long time with my erection. Before I started having problems my erections would be so hard it almost felt as if with the blood being powerfully forced outward into my dick, some opposing force or muscle in my lower belly, the area if you were to follow inside my belly where the shaft connects, something was pulling inward in opposition to the blood flowing outward. The sensation makes for super strong erections, almost like with a string puppet pulling down on the string makes the puppet raise his arm.
When practicing the 'root lock' I started getting this sensation and super hard erections. This brought a big time positive, so far permanent change in the quality of my wood.
I now do about 80% regular kegels and root locks to a 20% reverse kegel workout. It basically equates to 3-4 days a week of kegels and root locks, and on different days, 1 or 2 days a week a 1 or 2 20 second reverse kegel holds.
4. To address my libido through lots of research and a cabinet full of worthless supplements, I found a very important mineral that most people don't know anything about. (I tried Maca, horny goat weed, fenugreek, inositol, brocoli extracts and countless others). (note tribulus does seem to help a little with being more in the mood and L-arginine maybe indirectly helped as it lowered my blood pressure to normal levels when I take 1 cap twice a day)
It is Boron
It is known to increase testosterone and basically balance all hormones to good levels in both men and women.
I found something called Tri-Boron by a good supplement company. Just look it up. They recommend 2 caps twice a day. I started with just one a day, and noticed small improvement. So I started the recommended dose. Wow.
So I upped it even more and I felt like a teenager again. Sex was all that was on my mind.
I now take 2 caps three times a day because with most supplements the recommended dose is a safe dose to prevent bad things, but not a therapeutic dose. However I cycle it 3 days on 2 or 3 days off just because I feel anything that affects hormones should be cycled otherwise the body down regulates slightly and the supplement becomes less effective.
Also, I rub one out maybe 3 or 4 times a week to very tame porn, sometimes none, usually just pictures to keep that libido 'groove' in tact
5. Lastly and arguably most importantly, I simply decided to stop worrying about my dick. I just got tired of constantly monitoring how my penis felt, was it shrunk today, was it hard flaccid, was it plump, how long did it take to get fully hard, i got so sick of this I just said fuck it and who cares. Do the three things above that you know help and stop fretting over it. If you can't get hard with a girl, who cares it's happened before and you survived. You've had enough sex in your life that if it never works again, oh well. I was just sick of worrying about it constantly that I decided to let it all go. I feel this is a major part of recovery for anyone who has experienced erection problems before.
So that's that, a super long recount of over a year and a half of struggle with erection problems that seemingly came out of nowhere literally overnight.
Hope it can help others as this is a miserable thing to go through.
I went through a whirlwind the last year and a half with my EQ. I always had ridiculously hard erections that would come from simply kissing a girl or cuddling. Then one night with a girl, nothing happened, even with self stimulation. It felt like my penis was dead or not even there. It was very embarrassing and from this point on I couldn't get more than 75% hard even with porn, and if I stopped physical stimulation my erection would be gone in seconds.
I had a few more instances where I couldn't get it up and then started avoiding opportunities for sex because I didn't want to experience the humiliation of not being able to perform.
After a year and a half of trial and error, I confidently feel like I am 98% cured. And that last 2% is the fact that though they still come easy it seems erections don't come quite as instantaneously as they did before and libido is a little lower than I remember before that night above. However this could be due to getting older, I just turned 32.
I will explain what worked for me, but first I want to address no fap.
After not being able to get it up, I went on the internet and discovered no porn/no fap. I was always a at least once, usually 2-3 times a day masturbation with porn. So this got my attention. My first attempt I made it 65 days. Had a week of masturbating but no porn. Then I did 93 successful days. I still can't say whether this helped or hurt, but lean towards the latter.
My opinion, is that no fap/ no porn is not a good thing unless you have a serious problem, like hours a day to weird, disturbing porn. I was at 1-3 times a day to sometimes just pictures but otherwise normal, just a guy and girl going at it or 2 girls, or a girl solo. Why I think it can be detrimental is based on personal experience and some reading on the brain. During the end and after no fap I could once again get close to 90% erections but they would still disappear after seconds if manual stimulation was stopped. What changed though was that prior to no fap, though I couldn't get good erections I still mentally felt really horny all the time. After no fap, I could get decent erections and keep them if stimulation was kept up, however my libido and sex drive were GONE. I felt nothing when I saw a hot girl on TV or in the street. Had no desire for sex, to look at porn or masturbate. I basically made myself get off occasionally after I completed no fap. Kind of a catch-22.
Why I think no fap is a bad thing unless you have a serious problem ties in with some brain research. I won't get detailed so you can look it up, but basically when a person does something over and over again 'grooves' form in the brain making it subsequently easier for those types of neural connections to fire. If you complain all the time, it becomes easier to be negative and complain and harder to be positive. If you practice the same song on piano over and over the song gets easier to where you don't even have to think about it. Vice versa as well. My theory is that no fap did the opposite, making my sexual/horny neural connections rusty, thus I never felt that strong libido I had before.
But that's kind of off topic, if no fap works for you...awesome, it didn't for me.
So, here is what did work.
1. Reverse kegels. Leading up to that one night where everything to do with my erection changed I was doing a ton of super hard, long hold normal kegels because I knew I was going to have sex with this super hot girl I met, so I wanted my erection to be as good as possible (I'll talk about this state of mind later). I noticed after that night something didn't feel right in my pc/bc muscle area. It felt really tight, annoying almost painfully tight for pretty much a year.
So I found out about reverse kegels and started doing 100% reverse kegels only. At first I could hold them for maybe 10 seconds, but I worked up to doing 5 reps of 30 seconds spread throughout the day. After a couple weeks of No normal kegels only reverse, my erection quality improved greatly. So I kept at it. At about the 6 week mark I noticed erection quality starting to fade again. But kept up the reverse kegel only workout figuring there would be ups and downs in this recovery. I did reverse kegels only for about 3 months, around 5 30 second holds thoughout the day, 3-4 days a week. My erection was improved to about 80-85% and would remain longer with no stimulation, however this started to get worse after a while on the reverse kegel only workout.
Here I had sex a few times and it took manual stimulation to get hard, but once I was in I had no problem keeping it up, but still at about 75% quality. However, I noticed I could last forever. Before the erection problems, I got to where I could last a long time (from edging work) but it took a lot of mental discipline and effort so to speak and I would have the occasional 2 minute 'oops'. So I think reverse kegels are the answer to pre-ejac.
2. Regular kegels. At this point I stopped the reverse kegels but was afraid to do normal kegels because I didn't want that permanent tension in my pc muscle to return. But after a while I figured I had nothing to lose so I started doing really light, 10 second holds a few times a week. This definitely helped, I was at close to 90% after a couple weeks.
My theory is that I somehow messed up my pc/bc muscles from doing the super hard overtraining kegels. The reverse kegels helped this, and then doing reverse kegels only for so long, which actually made my erection worse, ultimately helped to get my pc/bc muscles healed and rid of the chronic tension. though it made them weak, thus starting up regular kegels after a sufficient amount of time spent relaxing them with reverse kegels. So I had to go backwards to go forward so to speak.
3. This one was a huge piece of the puzzle, something I interestingly can't find too much info on with regards to males, however a girl told me it is a fundamental part of her kundalini yoga practice but everything I find online talks about it in regards to females only.
It is the 'Root Lock'. Basically like doing a kegel with your anus. Squeezing it as if you wanted to hold in a fart.
After starting these, just 2-3 30 second holds a few times a week, I got a sensation I haven't had in a long time with my erection. Before I started having problems my erections would be so hard it almost felt as if with the blood being powerfully forced outward into my dick, some opposing force or muscle in my lower belly, the area if you were to follow inside my belly where the shaft connects, something was pulling inward in opposition to the blood flowing outward. The sensation makes for super strong erections, almost like with a string puppet pulling down on the string makes the puppet raise his arm.
When practicing the 'root lock' I started getting this sensation and super hard erections. This brought a big time positive, so far permanent change in the quality of my wood.
I now do about 80% regular kegels and root locks to a 20% reverse kegel workout. It basically equates to 3-4 days a week of kegels and root locks, and on different days, 1 or 2 days a week a 1 or 2 20 second reverse kegel holds.
4. To address my libido through lots of research and a cabinet full of worthless supplements, I found a very important mineral that most people don't know anything about. (I tried Maca, horny goat weed, fenugreek, inositol, brocoli extracts and countless others). (note tribulus does seem to help a little with being more in the mood and L-arginine maybe indirectly helped as it lowered my blood pressure to normal levels when I take 1 cap twice a day)
It is Boron
It is known to increase testosterone and basically balance all hormones to good levels in both men and women.
I found something called Tri-Boron by a good supplement company. Just look it up. They recommend 2 caps twice a day. I started with just one a day, and noticed small improvement. So I started the recommended dose. Wow.
So I upped it even more and I felt like a teenager again. Sex was all that was on my mind.
I now take 2 caps three times a day because with most supplements the recommended dose is a safe dose to prevent bad things, but not a therapeutic dose. However I cycle it 3 days on 2 or 3 days off just because I feel anything that affects hormones should be cycled otherwise the body down regulates slightly and the supplement becomes less effective.
Also, I rub one out maybe 3 or 4 times a week to very tame porn, sometimes none, usually just pictures to keep that libido 'groove' in tact
5. Lastly and arguably most importantly, I simply decided to stop worrying about my dick. I just got tired of constantly monitoring how my penis felt, was it shrunk today, was it hard flaccid, was it plump, how long did it take to get fully hard, i got so sick of this I just said fuck it and who cares. Do the three things above that you know help and stop fretting over it. If you can't get hard with a girl, who cares it's happened before and you survived. You've had enough sex in your life that if it never works again, oh well. I was just sick of worrying about it constantly that I decided to let it all go. I feel this is a major part of recovery for anyone who has experienced erection problems before.
So that's that, a super long recount of over a year and a half of struggle with erection problems that seemingly came out of nowhere literally overnight.
Hope it can help others as this is a miserable thing to go through.
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