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  • AP90 (anti-porn)
  • Fighting this drug for + 10 years. I AM SO OVER IT

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Fighting this drug for + 10 years. I AM SO OVER IT

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  1. Anewlife
    Anewlife - 11-27-2020
    Fellow wariors.

    Every time i feel like shit i fall back in the same old same old

    The trap

    it starts out little - you see a cute girl in the gym (what are girls wearing these days? it drives me absolutely insane to see the 17 year olds wearing skin tight leggings.)
    When i just started lifting it was just some sweaty dudes. But since the whole trend started up everything changed.. This is a real trigger for me and then the waterslide starts

    You come home and sit behind your computer, bored, alone.

    Lets start up the gateway drug - > youtube? instagram? Seeing a movie?

    Then the first cue hits -> cute girl doesnt wear a bra in a normal tv show. WOW what a rush.

    Than the rush wears of and the cravings start, what would that instagram page that you used to follow have to offer? Some new females perhaps?

    Or that subreddit that you used to watch? you know the one that turns you on so much, heaps of new material perhaps

    you fire op your browser and then it is actually too late. You start with one video on youtube 2 picutres on instagram 3 reddit videos.
    And than you visit the dealer again. You know what site i mean...

    And then you orgasm to that one clip. Close your browser..

    and than reality hits

    What did i do
    WHY again
    I will NEVER do this again

    and then you succeed for three days, maybe four, up to a week

    and then the itch starts again

    This cycle of addiciton is going on with me for over 10 years. ONly times that ive been completely clean was those times that i got with a new girl. Didnt think about the possibility even to look. BUt then after 3 moths you get the itch again.


    HOW to beat the urges? HOW TO BEAT THIS MONSTER.

    Let me tell you blockers dont work. IF you want to look you are going to get it one way or another. there is always a way.

    Please let me know how you did manage to kick this forever.

    THANKS GUYS day 1 for me lets goooo
  2. DickieBill
    DickieBill - 12-01-2020
    Hey man - you got this. I completely understand (I bet we all do) the cycle of self loathing, the "I will NEVER do this again" and then the weakness and the slip and the hate and the "I will NEVER do this again" and the, etc etc etc. Just remember to grant yourself the same "grace" or "mercy" or whatever that you would give someone else working on quitting a strong addiction. Beating yourself up doesn't do you any good and doesn't put yourself in a good position for longterm success.

    Like most (all?) of us here, I've been through this cycle over and over again throughout my life, both as a teen and now as an adult. But each time I fail I just start back up again. Not sure if I'll ever be truly porn-free, at least free from the desires/need/urges to view it. But I do celebrate every time I'm tempted and don't act out, rather than beating myself up each time that I do.

    So let us know how it's going, how we can help you. And if you want an accountability partner, DM me.
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