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Thread: The Manly Arts!
- 06-05-2013 #221
I feel that one of the attributes of a real man is that he is in control of his emotions at all times. That isn't to say he doesn't become vulnerable or feel sadness, but he doesn't let these things control him.
If you're still of the mindset that your mother or your ex or whomever is "making" you feel a certain way (whether good or bad) then you are not in control of yourself and are not taking responsibility for your feelings.
I had a run in with this just the other week. I thought I was all high and mighty because I was in control of my emotions. No one could make me feel bad. Then this girl walks into my life and she starts "making" me feel good. She starts saying things like how awesome I am, how she's quickly falling for me, she repetitively told me all the things that any guy would love to hear. She was essentially pushing my feel-good buttons. I had to put a stop to that as soon as I became aware of it.
That isn't to say I don't enjoy her company but I don't want her to be in control of when I'm feeling good about myself, or when I'm feeling bad. She says one thing, I'm up. She says another, I'm down. Why should I give anyone that kind of power over me?"Know the rules well, so that you may properly break them" - The Dalai Lama
Do not criticize the seed for not yet being a tree.
Character is destiny - Sigmund Freud
As long as I have breath in my lungs, I will make this happen
- 06-05-2013 #222
It depends on how much you gave those people really. In my case I gave 12 years taking care of my mother and in the end all I got was her lying that I was abusing her and having the cops talk to me before the state took her away, so I am going to have the emotional/mental baggage equal to that of the lost and found of an airport. As for an ex doing that I would love for that to not have as much power over me, but can't seem to be able to get out of that, possibly because I still talk to her and she is probably my best friend, which is both sad and great at the same time. In the end though each person will have someone, or something, that gets under their skin or burrows into their thoughts so deep that even when you think it is over you forgot to tear the roots out and it came right back.
I had a run in with this just the other week. I thought I was all high and mighty because I was in control of my emotions. No one could make me feel bad. Then this girl walks into my life and she starts "making" me feel good. She starts saying things like how awesome I am, how she's quickly falling for me, she repetitively told me all the things that any guy would love to hear. She was essentially pushing my feel-good buttons. I had to put a stop to that as soon as I became aware of it.
That isn't to say I don't enjoy her company but I don't want her to be in control of when I'm feeling good about myself, or when I'm feeling bad. She says one thing, I'm up. She says another, I'm down. Why should I give anyone that kind of power over me?
Throughout our whole lives we are divvying up pieces of ourselves, deciding what and who makes us happy or angry, the difference is how much we give out to each person or thing. Sometimes we give too much to one person or thing, maybe because we were being to dependent on them or perhaps that person or thing was what caused a dramatic change, for the better or worse, and it just naturally stuck to you. There will always be something that makes you lose control in some way.
No one is 100% in control of their feelings.
- 06-07-2013 #223
It's called being human. When you were a kid your parents had the same effect on you, at least I would hope...unless you're some kind of sociopath it's natural. I think you may be trying a bit too hard at whatever it is you want to prove to yourself. Instead of looking at it as "giving anyone that kind of power over me" you should be looking at it for what it is...valuing the opinion of somebody you have let close enough into your life to give you positive and negative feedback. Whether you feel up or down is completely up to you.
START 12-17-2012 BPEL: 6.0 MEG 5.0
CURRENT BPEL: 7.2 MEG 5.4
- 06-08-2013 #224
Good points gentlemen.
The trick, methinks, is to chose wisely those whose opinions we really care about.Pirate Diplomacy:
The art of telling someone to go to hell and having them look forward to the trip.
Remember: If done right, there is no such thing as safe sex.
- 06-09-2013 #225"Know the rules well, so that you may properly break them" - The Dalai Lama
Do not criticize the seed for not yet being a tree.
Character is destiny - Sigmund Freud
As long as I have breath in my lungs, I will make this happen
- 06-09-2013 #226
Last edited by goodfellow; 06-09-2013 at 02:25 PM.
August 2012 Feb 2013 August 2013
BPFL 11,5cm 11,7cm 11,5cm
FG 10,0cm 11,4cm 12,2cm
BPEL 15,8cm 15,9cm 16,6cm
EG 12,5cm 13,2cm 13,2cm
Wannabe
FG 13,5cm
BPEL 16,4cm
- 06-10-2013 #227
- 10-07-2013 #228
Do what you think will make the world a better place. If doing something won't make the world a better place, don't do it.
Pirate Diplomacy:
The art of telling someone to go to hell and having them look forward to the trip.
Remember: If done right, there is no such thing as safe sex.
- 10-11-2013 #229
Learn how to wet shave using a safety razor
The Ten Minute Traditional Wet Shave - YouTube
You will save a billion doubloons per year.Pirate Diplomacy:
The art of telling someone to go to hell and having them look forward to the trip.
Remember: If done right, there is no such thing as safe sex.
- 10-11-2013 #230
Thank you for sharing this with the boys Pirate. By the way guys, he's on to something with this, so check it out.
Draggin Trainer
Tikkun Olam
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