Being a victim of a stereotype brought me here

[tjny Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close tjny]

What's up guys?

I'm TJ. A recent college grad and a black man with an average sized penis (6.0" BPL x 4.5). There were many times during my teenage and early college years were I would pull my pants down and get that "Is that it?" look on a girls face. Ever since I started to become sexually active I was reminded that I did not live up to the myth of the massive black dick. Sometimes I think I would be a lot more confident in myself if I weren't black. I mean, my size could be a hell of a lot worse but I've had to deal with this stigma my whole life.

However, no one is perfect and everyone can improve - that's why I am here. I want to have a penis that could make me feel confident and powerful and also one that can pleasure my girlfriend of 2 years even more. I do not think my girlfriend knows how self conscious I am about my dick. In fact, she tells me during sex how much she's being filled up but there are times when I get really insecure about my size. As we're having sex I constantly have negative thoughts running through my head: Is she just faking it? Why can I never make her orgasm without her using her fingers? I wish I can do that position but my dick is too skinny etc etc. Although she never complained about my dick I know an improvement could do wonders for our sex life and also for my personal self esteem.

I would appreciate any and all advice and I am looking forward to reading up on the beginners thread and getting started!

TJ

[Tamora Retired Super Moderator Member of the Month Aug 2015 PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close Tamora]

Welcome to the madhouse TJ!

Educate yourself by reading as much as you can before starting any kind of PE, don't just dive right in first and then learn by your mistakes.

START HERE!

Get involved, SAFETY FIRST and most important...ENJOY!

[CLOSEDDennyA Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close CLOSEDDennyA]

I always thought how hard this stereotype must be to live up to...I remember the movie Soul Man where a white kid pretends to be black and sleeps with a girl in college and she says something like I guess the rumors aren't true. It is true if you are not black girls are not expecting a big surprise. Well at least PE can make the rumors true for you...good luck!

[Zman007 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Zman007]

It has to be a rough stereotype to be hanging over your head. Studies have shown minimal difference in size due to race, yet expectations are a big black cock.

You are in the right place, happy PEing!

[burtybasset Retired Moderator Member of the Month May 2014PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close burtybasset]

Welcome tjny!

I think many women don't orgasm from penetration, don't stress. Your size is average too, no need to worry about that either.

Good luck to you achieving your goals!

[closed291 Retired ModeratorPEGym Hero Member of the Month June 2016 Find all posts View Profile Close closed291]

Hey TJ, welcome!

I'm black too...glad that you are here.

If you need any help, let us know.

[domnus Senior Member Member of the Month Dec 2016 Find all posts View Profile Close domnus]

Hello tj, welcome to the gym. You are in the right place to learn how to grow up to that stereotype. But have you ever thought that maybe you are the perfect size for your gf? I don't know how important this gf is to you, but if you want to know if it's your size that is preventing her from penetration orgasm, you might consider going and buying a toy that is a little bigger than you and and try using it on her. If she doesn't like it or mentions it's uncomfortable, you will know that she is not faking. If she likes it then you will know she can handle more and still enjoy it. She will not be able to hide the truth from you either way if you are paying attention.
The tricky part is not letting this affect your confidence if she does like the bigger size. I know you are here in large part for yourself not just for her.
If this gf could be "the one" you might want to be sure that building your dreamcock is going to please her as well. If you already know she is not someone you see yourself with forever then you have nothing to worry about.
Good luck on your journey!
I only offer this suggestion because I have done this with my wife of 20+ years and she knows I do the exs recommended on this site. I wanted to know what the max size is she can take and still receive pleasure. Now I know

[tjny Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close tjny]

Thank you all for the warm welcome. Looking forward to improving with all of you...

TJ

[TheZZMan Moderator Member of the Month Sept 2018PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close TheZZMan]

Your girlfriend has been with you for 2 years - think of that 2 years my friend. She digs you my friend, and couldn't give a rip about the size of your unit. So ease off the stress about it - you have found the PEGym. Now study and exercise and see what you can do to improve your situation over time. But in the short term, give this beautiful lady all the joy your can muster. She really is with you for you, not your dick. Let her know how much you appreciate that.

[ProjectMagnum Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close ProjectMagnum]

Welcome to the gym. Because I'm also a new member, I can't really give you any advice on PE. But I understand where you're coming from. The porn industry has given countless people the image that a well-endowed penis is average. And unfortunately for black men outside of the industry especially, they emphasize this as a characteristic feature when science has proven that penis size does not correlate to race. But, you are considered average and up to par with most men. As for your relationship, you both have been together for two years. Your penis clearly isn't a deal breaker.

[Big Al AdministratorPEGym EditorMale Enhancement Coach Rep.PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close Big Al]

Tjny,


Welcome to the forum. Please be aware that MANY men in your position have experienced the same thing. It's a sad thing to hear of your experiences, and worse considering your penis is actually statistically above average! Still, as long as the stereotype persists then men in your position can expect to be seen as objects by some.