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Hi,
I've been in a 3.5 month relationship with a nice woman. Our only disagreements come over my lack of ability to maintain a strong enough erection to please her. I am 28, and she is 25. We recently took a vacation and a couple of weeks before the trip was the first time we tried being intimate. I failed miserably and couldn't get a strong enough erection to stay inside of her.
She got really upset and thought it was because I wasn't attracted to her. She stormed out of my apartment and stopped talking to me for a day. She told me she has never had to deal with this problem before and told me this was more of a problem with old men than someone who is 28. I explained to her that I am really attracted to her and that I love her (that's the truth). I told her the problem is mostly one of my own, but it makes me feel worse when she reacts like that. Since that day, she said she would be better at reacting to my lack of erections to please her but she hasn't (more on that later).
On the vacation, we finally hit the jack pot and I was able to make her cum once and maintain a couple of strong erections while she blew me on the trip. Oddly enough, I am able to get hard when she gives me a blow job or hand job usually. My erectile issues seem to be related to the vagina, as I can't seem to get a strong enough erection most of the time to get in there. I was only able to get really hard once there. I should also note I haven't had a lot of experience and didn't masturbate with lube regularly so maybe I'm just not used to the feeling of a vagina yet?
As soon as we came back from the vacay my ED seems to have come back. One night when I wasn't in the mood (didn't even try sex as we had a late night flight back and I was tired), she slept in the other room in frustration. Last night it happened again and she kept trying to get me to have sex (3 times and I failed each time). I did get pretty erect when she played with my balls, but as soon as I got inside of her I lost the erection. What made me upset is she told me "you're not even trying", but on 3 occasions I did and lost wood.
Her disappointment at the lack of my ability to please her is killing me. She gets visibly upset, and I think it makes me feel even worse. I've pleaded with her to let me give her a hand job or use a vibrator for the time being as an alternative to please her, and she is having none of it. She frequently shuts down socially when I can't perform, and I've told her that I understand but that it makes me feel worse when I see her visibly upset.
She wants my penis penetration only. I'm kind of feeling lost and like a failure. She also has made a couple of joking comments recently about how I can't get it up and yesterday called me "Baby dick". She keeps saying sex is "really important" to her and that it needs to happen soon and at least once or twice a week. I brought up in the fact that there's hope since I made her cum once with a fairly strong erection. I also am really trying to convince her to let me please her in alternate ways but she only wants dick.
I used to be a heavy porn watcher in my early 20's and think a combination of that and performance anxiety could be causing this. However, in the last year or so I've even lost desire to watch porn. I can go like a week or two without masturbating and not even get morning wood or feel the urge to do it. I've only fapped once in the last month and still have a low sex drive. I wonder if it's low testosterone. I've only seen moderate results using natural remedies like horny goat weed. Nonetheless, this problem has started to eat away at me, and I just wish my girlfriend would be a little more supportive about it.
Is this relationship worth continuing on? Our only argument has been about sex. I feel an enormous pressure to perform for her, but can't. I'm going to schedule a doctor's appointment this week to see if he can figure out the reason behind my ED. Any support/comments would be appreciated!
I've been in a 3.5 month relationship with a nice woman. Our only disagreements come over my lack of ability to maintain a strong enough erection to please her. I am 28, and she is 25. We recently took a vacation and a couple of weeks before the trip was the first time we tried being intimate. I failed miserably and couldn't get a strong enough erection to stay inside of her.
She got really upset and thought it was because I wasn't attracted to her. She stormed out of my apartment and stopped talking to me for a day. She told me she has never had to deal with this problem before and told me this was more of a problem with old men than someone who is 28. I explained to her that I am really attracted to her and that I love her (that's the truth). I told her the problem is mostly one of my own, but it makes me feel worse when she reacts like that. Since that day, she said she would be better at reacting to my lack of erections to please her but she hasn't (more on that later).
On the vacation, we finally hit the jack pot and I was able to make her cum once and maintain a couple of strong erections while she blew me on the trip. Oddly enough, I am able to get hard when she gives me a blow job or hand job usually. My erectile issues seem to be related to the vagina, as I can't seem to get a strong enough erection most of the time to get in there. I was only able to get really hard once there. I should also note I haven't had a lot of experience and didn't masturbate with lube regularly so maybe I'm just not used to the feeling of a vagina yet?
As soon as we came back from the vacay my ED seems to have come back. One night when I wasn't in the mood (didn't even try sex as we had a late night flight back and I was tired), she slept in the other room in frustration. Last night it happened again and she kept trying to get me to have sex (3 times and I failed each time). I did get pretty erect when she played with my balls, but as soon as I got inside of her I lost the erection. What made me upset is she told me "you're not even trying", but on 3 occasions I did and lost wood.
Her disappointment at the lack of my ability to please her is killing me. She gets visibly upset, and I think it makes me feel even worse. I've pleaded with her to let me give her a hand job or use a vibrator for the time being as an alternative to please her, and she is having none of it. She frequently shuts down socially when I can't perform, and I've told her that I understand but that it makes me feel worse when I see her visibly upset.
She wants my penis penetration only. I'm kind of feeling lost and like a failure. She also has made a couple of joking comments recently about how I can't get it up and yesterday called me "Baby dick". She keeps saying sex is "really important" to her and that it needs to happen soon and at least once or twice a week. I brought up in the fact that there's hope since I made her cum once with a fairly strong erection. I also am really trying to convince her to let me please her in alternate ways but she only wants dick.
I used to be a heavy porn watcher in my early 20's and think a combination of that and performance anxiety could be causing this. However, in the last year or so I've even lost desire to watch porn. I can go like a week or two without masturbating and not even get morning wood or feel the urge to do it. I've only fapped once in the last month and still have a low sex drive. I wonder if it's low testosterone. I've only seen moderate results using natural remedies like horny goat weed. Nonetheless, this problem has started to eat away at me, and I just wish my girlfriend would be a little more supportive about it.
Is this relationship worth continuing on? Our only argument has been about sex. I feel an enormous pressure to perform for her, but can't. I'm going to schedule a doctor's appointment this week to see if he can figure out the reason behind my ED. Any support/comments would be appreciated!
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