New (and overwhelmed)

[Anonymmm Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Anonymmm]

Hullo everyone,
I shall try my best to keep this brief. How did I get here? Having been a lazy git for the most of my short existence - at least when it comes to social life - I never thought I would get a girlfriend. However, a few months back, my life changed... a lot. I met someone, online, but still... it did not take us long to figure out we were a match, and not much longer to move from naughty texts to, ahem, pleasing ourselves together via Skype. Now, our sessions have quickly lead me to one cruel realisation and many questions.

The realisation
- I don't last... at all

While I am ready to finish in basically the first minute or two, she will go for... 30, 45 minutes even? Ok, something is wrong. A few days younger me starts googling around and WOW, there is so much stuff on this on the internet. I should probably mention a major flaw of mine... I am a highly emotional perfectionist. Plunging deeper into the topic, thoughts of depression while reading about all the guys who make women orgasm so much, because this and that, mix with feelings of happiness over the fact that something can be done and ultimately end up creating a huge mess in my head together with all the other things that I have read. Just this "gym" alone... there is so much!

So, what am I getting at here. Super sum up - I want my girlfriend to have the most pleasure she can get from me when we do it, and I am ready invest time as much time needed, but there is simply too much info here - What should I do to last longer? Should I do enlargement exercises? Should I do other exercises too? How frequently, for how long? Where do I start at?

And as a bonus - okay, this will probably sound incredibly naive, but as this is anonymous, so might as well... should I buy some sort of masturbator? Shouldn't I... wait to do the actual thing with my girlfriend (eyy, here comes a even more naive statement - we will have to wait years till we can meet irl, distance between us is too great, but I believe we can do it + she is religious, so no sex before marriage).

I am not brief at all, am I? Alright, stopping here for now. I hope I am taking this to the right forum - ANY adice regarding ANYTHING I have mentioned or anything else really is deeply appreciated.

Right, I could not have drafter a more horrid text. If you have really made it this far, congratulations.


Signing off,
Anonymmm

[TheSperminator Member of the Month Oct 12 Find all posts View Profile Close TheSperminator]

Welcome to the forum!

There's a whole forum dedicated to premature ejaculation. Read articles there. Search for "kegels". That's a specific exercise to help you last longer in bed.

If you want to please her the best you can I sugges you download or buy some sex books as well. Plenty of "how to make her cum" etc on the internet. Read, memorize, apply.

Also communicate and find out what she likes in bed. That definetly helps.

You could buy a bathmate stamina unit. It replicates a vagina but it's much more intense. You can train lasting longer with this device. It is costly tho. Your choice!

Regards
Sperminator

[WillGetBetter Senior Member Member of the Month Nov 2018 Find all posts View Profile Close WillGetBetter]

A good place to start are the stickies in the premature ejaculation forum.

I spent the last few months training to fix my PreE. I had it 20 years and assumed it was something I had to live with. But, after finding this site and following the advice of people on the PreE forum, I completely fixed it. I wish I would have had access to a site like this when I was in my 20’s!

Here’s my success post.
https://www.pegym.com/forums/success...aculation.html

It outlines every thing I did. You should expect to spend about 30 minutes each day. One of the main causes of PreE is a tight pelvic floor. That’s what causes the involuntary kegels and contractions of the pelvic floor muscles that lead to ejaculation.

Here’s a quick outline of the main steps.

1. Do pelvic floor stretches. Look in my post above for a list of them. The main ones are happy baby pose, Hindi squats, butterfly, reverse hurdler, and cobra. You can look them up on YouTube. Also, sit on a tennis ball and roll it around in your pelvic floor area. Also, look up anterior pelvic tilt. A number of members here with PreE also have APT. It also causes a tight pelvic floor.
2. Learn to reverse kegel and do them all the time. No normal kegels for now. Kegels tighten your pelvic floor even more. You need to loosen it. Reverse kegels are the action you feel when you start your flow of urine and make it come out faster. A kegel is the tightening of the muscles that stop your flow of urine. Do only RKs now. Later, after you beat your PreE you can strengthen you pelvic floor with normal kegels. You will us RKs during sex to lower your arousal and keep you from the point of no return (PONR).
3. Yes, but a masturbator now (fleshlight STU is a common one). Buy lube. You will use it 20 minutes each day to do what is called edging. You will practice building up your stamina. RKs and pelvic floor stretches will help. Your goal is to achieve an arousa plateau. People with PreE don’t have a plateau- they just jump right to the PONR and ejaculate. Learn your arousal levels 0 through 10. Trying to slowly ramp up to a 6 and stay there as long as you can. Only ejaculate every 3 days (twice a year). You need to train your brain that you don't have to ejaculate every time.
4. Learn to do relaxation breathing. Breathe from your diaphragm. Start to do a RK for each breath in. This will help keep your arousal in check.

My success post has much for information. Good luck. If you commit to this, you should have it beat in a couple months. Then you’ll have a lifetime of fun.

[Big Al AdministratorPEGym EditorMale Enhancement Coach Rep.PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close Big Al]

Welcome to the forum!

Focusing on stamina is your best bet. There are specific exercises you can do manually AND with your sexual partner.