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Hey Guys,
I'm posting this desperately seeking help because like the title of my post says I've been struggling with HF and ED for 6 years now. I started masterbating with and without porn around the age of 12-13 and became sexually active my freshman year of high school at the age of 14. All throughout high school and college I never experienced any problems with achieving or maintaining an erection but I will say that from time to time I would experience premature ejaculation. The premature ejaculation never really bothered me too much and I always assumed it was because I was young, very sensitive and easily excited. Now in retrospect I believe the premature ejaculation was caused by a tight pelvic floor that was conditioned by masterbating with porn. I never attempted penis exercises such as "jelqing" but now that I think about it I would masterbate while watching porn and try to last as long as possible by not touching myself or kegeling when I would reach the point of no return. So in a sense I guess I was "edging" in hopes of curing my premature ejaculation. When I was 22 is when the real problems started...
I remember during finals week I was pulling all nighters and studying as much as I could day in and day out. Then one day I had sex with my girlfriend at the time in the morning, masterbated to porn in the afternoon and then masterbated once again at night time in between studies. I know now that this was a very stupid thing to do but at the time I was under the impression that my penis was indestructible and my stress levels were pretty high. That third time while I was masterbating I felt a very sharp pain in my pelvic floor region and my penis immediately "turtled" and retracted towards my body. My penis was very small, hard to the touch, cold to the touch and lifeless. Never experiencing something like this before I became very anxious and worried. I didn't know what to do and was also very embarrassed so I didn't tell anyone and thought things would resolve on their own. After a few days my penis started to loosen up a little bit but was still hard in the flaccid state, smaller, cold and the sensitivity was very abnormal. I decided it was time to tell my mother who insisted that I see a urologist. The first urologist I went to basically wrote me off, told me to resume masterbating and wrote me a script for viagra. Realizing this guy didn't help me at all I went to get a second opinion from another urologist. This doctor ran every test imaginable but everything came back normal in regard to my penis and overall health. He even suggested that I might have prostatitis even though my bloodwork, urine, and prostate fluid showed no signs of infection. Finally I went to a third urologist, who actually listened to me and realized things were abnormally hard down there but admitted that this wasn't something he was familiar with.
At that point I was very depressed and came to the conclusion that this was something I would have to solve on my own. I started googling my symptoms which are:
There might be some other symptoms but that's all I can think of off the top of my head. When I googled these symptoms I was shocked to see how many men were in the same boat as me. During this time I also learned that the pelvic floor muscles played a major role in achieving and maintaining erections. I decided the next plausible step for me would be seeing a pelvic floor physical therapist. Over the last 4 years or so I think I've seen 4-5 different pelvic floor specialists. I even went to Beyond Basics in NYC but was only able to go a few times because of the distance. Sometimes I would leave these places with some relief but roughly only 10%-20% better. The longest I ever saw a therapist consistently was for 4 months 3x a week and I'm still in the same situation. They would perform inter rectal trigger point therapy on me but I never felt like that made much of any difference. In fact, I feel like I'm more tight towards the front of my pelvic floor not the back near the anus. No physical therapist I ever saw focused on this front area of the pelvic floor. I also feel like none of the physical therapists took my whole body into consideration. I always see people with this problem stating that body alignment and posture have a role to play with pelvic floor dysfunction and since then I've been working on postural issues that I believe I have such as: kyphosis, ATP, knee valgus and my right hip is higher than my left.
Over the last 6 years my symptoms have seemed to fluctuate for better or for worse but I have never returned to 100% normal function. I remember a couple years ago I used to perform the 11 stretches featured in Amy Stein's "Heal Pelvic Pain" religiously and that seemed to help me out the most. Again, I would never reach 100% recovery but I would notice improvement here and there. I became frustrated and I stopped doing these exercises and started focusing on other aspects of my life such as my career and school. Three years ago I met the woman of my dreams and for the first year of our relationship my symptoms weren't so terrible. I knew that I was still not back to normal but she couldn't really notice a problem. I was lucky enough to get married while having this condition but for the last year and a half my symptoms have seemed to return with a vengeance. This has seriously taken a toll on my self-esteem and confidence which has negatively effected my life in many ways. Sometimes I even feel selfish for bringing her along on this awful ride. She has been very loving and supportive through all of it but I still can't help but think that she would be better off without me.
Im 28 years old and about to turn 29. I made a pact with myself that I am going to do everything in my power to get rid of this and not give up. I feel like the medical world has in many ways let me down and I'm going to have to rely on myself to get out of this hellhole. I am at a point where I believe you guys are my only hope at overcoming this and would greatly appreciate any suggestions or advice you may have. I highly respect this community and believe that you have improved the lives of many men across the globe. I hope someone here can point me in the right direction...
Sorry for this long post but this problem has been going on for many years. I've learned a lot about myself throughout this process and have gained an enormous amount of compassion for other people. I tried to write down everything that I thought was important and related to my condition so it could give you guys a better picture of what I'm dealing with and how to solve it. I guess my main questions are:
Thank you in advance and I hope all of you had a wonderful Christmas! Feel free to ask me any questions!
I'm posting this desperately seeking help because like the title of my post says I've been struggling with HF and ED for 6 years now. I started masterbating with and without porn around the age of 12-13 and became sexually active my freshman year of high school at the age of 14. All throughout high school and college I never experienced any problems with achieving or maintaining an erection but I will say that from time to time I would experience premature ejaculation. The premature ejaculation never really bothered me too much and I always assumed it was because I was young, very sensitive and easily excited. Now in retrospect I believe the premature ejaculation was caused by a tight pelvic floor that was conditioned by masterbating with porn. I never attempted penis exercises such as "jelqing" but now that I think about it I would masterbate while watching porn and try to last as long as possible by not touching myself or kegeling when I would reach the point of no return. So in a sense I guess I was "edging" in hopes of curing my premature ejaculation. When I was 22 is when the real problems started...
I remember during finals week I was pulling all nighters and studying as much as I could day in and day out. Then one day I had sex with my girlfriend at the time in the morning, masterbated to porn in the afternoon and then masterbated once again at night time in between studies. I know now that this was a very stupid thing to do but at the time I was under the impression that my penis was indestructible and my stress levels were pretty high. That third time while I was masterbating I felt a very sharp pain in my pelvic floor region and my penis immediately "turtled" and retracted towards my body. My penis was very small, hard to the touch, cold to the touch and lifeless. Never experiencing something like this before I became very anxious and worried. I didn't know what to do and was also very embarrassed so I didn't tell anyone and thought things would resolve on their own. After a few days my penis started to loosen up a little bit but was still hard in the flaccid state, smaller, cold and the sensitivity was very abnormal. I decided it was time to tell my mother who insisted that I see a urologist. The first urologist I went to basically wrote me off, told me to resume masterbating and wrote me a script for viagra. Realizing this guy didn't help me at all I went to get a second opinion from another urologist. This doctor ran every test imaginable but everything came back normal in regard to my penis and overall health. He even suggested that I might have prostatitis even though my bloodwork, urine, and prostate fluid showed no signs of infection. Finally I went to a third urologist, who actually listened to me and realized things were abnormally hard down there but admitted that this wasn't something he was familiar with.
At that point I was very depressed and came to the conclusion that this was something I would have to solve on my own. I started googling my symptoms which are:
- smaller in the flaccid state
- harder in the flaccid state
- veins are more prominent in penis (especially what I believe is the dorsal vein)
- no morning erections
- no spontaneous erections
- when erection is achieved it is 60%-70%
- hard to achieve any erection while standing
- erection needs constant stimulation to maintain rigidness
- less sensitivity (sometimes completely numb)
- lower libido
- deflated glans
- cold glans
- dribbling ejaculations
- symptoms sometimes worse after ejaculation
- hesitancy when urinating
- weak urine flow
- straining with bowel movements
There might be some other symptoms but that's all I can think of off the top of my head. When I googled these symptoms I was shocked to see how many men were in the same boat as me. During this time I also learned that the pelvic floor muscles played a major role in achieving and maintaining erections. I decided the next plausible step for me would be seeing a pelvic floor physical therapist. Over the last 4 years or so I think I've seen 4-5 different pelvic floor specialists. I even went to Beyond Basics in NYC but was only able to go a few times because of the distance. Sometimes I would leave these places with some relief but roughly only 10%-20% better. The longest I ever saw a therapist consistently was for 4 months 3x a week and I'm still in the same situation. They would perform inter rectal trigger point therapy on me but I never felt like that made much of any difference. In fact, I feel like I'm more tight towards the front of my pelvic floor not the back near the anus. No physical therapist I ever saw focused on this front area of the pelvic floor. I also feel like none of the physical therapists took my whole body into consideration. I always see people with this problem stating that body alignment and posture have a role to play with pelvic floor dysfunction and since then I've been working on postural issues that I believe I have such as: kyphosis, ATP, knee valgus and my right hip is higher than my left.
Over the last 6 years my symptoms have seemed to fluctuate for better or for worse but I have never returned to 100% normal function. I remember a couple years ago I used to perform the 11 stretches featured in Amy Stein's "Heal Pelvic Pain" religiously and that seemed to help me out the most. Again, I would never reach 100% recovery but I would notice improvement here and there. I became frustrated and I stopped doing these exercises and started focusing on other aspects of my life such as my career and school. Three years ago I met the woman of my dreams and for the first year of our relationship my symptoms weren't so terrible. I knew that I was still not back to normal but she couldn't really notice a problem. I was lucky enough to get married while having this condition but for the last year and a half my symptoms have seemed to return with a vengeance. This has seriously taken a toll on my self-esteem and confidence which has negatively effected my life in many ways. Sometimes I even feel selfish for bringing her along on this awful ride. She has been very loving and supportive through all of it but I still can't help but think that she would be better off without me.
Im 28 years old and about to turn 29. I made a pact with myself that I am going to do everything in my power to get rid of this and not give up. I feel like the medical world has in many ways let me down and I'm going to have to rely on myself to get out of this hellhole. I am at a point where I believe you guys are my only hope at overcoming this and would greatly appreciate any suggestions or advice you may have. I highly respect this community and believe that you have improved the lives of many men across the globe. I hope someone here can point me in the right direction...
Sorry for this long post but this problem has been going on for many years. I've learned a lot about myself throughout this process and have gained an enormous amount of compassion for other people. I tried to write down everything that I thought was important and related to my condition so it could give you guys a better picture of what I'm dealing with and how to solve it. I guess my main questions are:
- Does this sound like your typical hard flaccid/tight pelvic floor case?
- Do you think my postural issues are holding me back from reaching 100% recovery?
- Should I be able to feel a reverse kegel in the front of my pelvic floor? Would gaining more strength in my abdominals help me with reverse kegels?
- Is there anything else I'm not thinking of that could potentially help me out?
Thank you in advance and I hope all of you had a wonderful Christmas! Feel free to ask me any questions!
. lol have fun and good luck.
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