Quitting PE 2 years in On Iffy Terms

[Gnicbom]

Hello all.

I'm age 33; I eat healthy (including supplements) and exercise regularly (weights, occasional biking, with a mindful bike saddle for my perineum, and I recently started yoga, am already loving it). Uncircumcised/Uncut.

I have been doing PE for about 2 years, with 1 year to 1.5 years ~cumulatively~ of PE being done with consistency.

I formally quit PE as of today (this would have been the day to resume PE in my schedule after two days off). I decided last night.

Yesterday was a masturbation day (first time cumming in over a week, which is normal for me per my disciplined nature paired up with PE). Shower, pussy sleeve to cum, standing, as is my usual way lately. Hours on in the day after masturbation, there were some irregular sensations on/throughout my penis in the day that I noted, though none of which were painful. That all is not that uncommon of me. For what it's worth, I do have a history of prostatitis or some kind of prostate/urinary issue (saving you all from me delving into that subject, but I plan to get it straightened out once and for all, freaking hopefully, as I'm still quite young).

This post, my query, is directed to those who have the proper insight from firsthand experience or secondhand experiences of those others who have decided to stop PE on concerning terms. Concerning, as in - some physical gains have been made, but unfortunately, as it is in my case, the overall EQ/physiological indicators (PIs)/sensitivity factors have wavered towards a negative, over the span of doing PE (I was stupid and ignored PI indicators fairly early on, I'm sure of it).

MY POSITIVE REPORT:
- Noticeably more girth; not a lot, not a little, more flaccid and some while erect.
- Slightly noticeably longer, definitely flaccid and some while erect.
(I fully suspect both length and girth gains will subside to some degree, based on other times of me pausing PE)
- I'm not in any actual pain in my penis or genital area (big positive).

MY NEUTRAL REPORT:
- Along my natural upward curve, there's a ~deviation~ in the upper 1/4 quadrant of my penis; basically the penis natural curve is rounded up, ~up until~ a point where it angles up more intensely. This developed to my knowledge/awareness sometime in January of this year (2020).
- I have had some great morning woods in the last 2-3 weeks (and variable ones in the past), BUT -what makes it more of neutral report- I'm unfortunately not sure how PE has affected some of them.. And I don't know if stress is just getting to me or not. On a related note, one thing I largely wonder about: Seeing how jelqing has caused my penis veins to be bigger, but my PIs are not so great, does that not mean that there's an imbalance somewhere in terms of blood flow? It's hard for me to word properly what I mean by that. Something about blood retention, though. Supply and demand. Basically, I have to wonder if I might need some degree of some PE exercises in the future for any help to the current state my penis is in, should my penis not go back to even some of the way it was, before PE. I have to wonder if the constant days in a row of PE created the better penis blood flow at times, like in the morning, for example (I had some serious 'diamond cutters' not that long ago). Not my penis 'naturally', per se.
- I'm guessing this is a negative report: superficial dorsal vein seems kind of bigger...I don't know what that means. If it means an affected area (injury), or not. I think it's grown to be that way somewhere along with PE, but I just attributed it to a positive. Now, I'm not so sure.
- Like my aforementioned [superficial] dorsal vein being a bit bigger, I do have prominent veins on the right side, like one in particular, it is quite big. This side vein, like the superficial dorsal vein--they're not hard to the touch or painful.

MY NEGATIVE REPORT:
- One irritated lymph vessel on left side: mostly healed now (the affected vessel is slightly hardened still, but not a guitar cord like thing it used to be, thankfully). Just for the record, this is not a vein issue, folks, let it be known. Lymphocele.
- Some spider veins: near the top, below the glans, particularly on the sides and underside. That sucks, but oh well. It could be worse: there could be much more than there are.
- Overall penis sensitivity: noticeably lessened; I have to work at getting REALLY hard, no doubt harder than I used to (I feel like that much older due to the fact I cannot remember how I used to be), and the erection doesn't seem to stay as long as it should. This is obviously my main area of concern right now and going forward.
- My penis glans/head is on the paler/light pink side. Nothing alarming, it's not white. However, what IS more clear as being pale and with hints of that not-good "blue" is the edge/rim of the base of the head. That just mildly concerns me. At times it's more so visible than other times. I can truly not recall how I looked before PE. Hopefully that's mostly a statement of indifference.

I will say though, on the subject of color, it's made me wonder if I felt like my shaft skin was getting darker or it was my head/glans that was gradually losing some red tone in favor of a pink (even though, yes - I'm aware jelqing typically causes darkening of the skin, the Firegoat Roll tool has been effective on me). Anyways, the whole subject of glans color is a non-issue when I'm hard, as far as I care to say.

- One half dime size dark spot on glans head, appeared within the first 3 months of PE (so, around August of 2018): virtually totally healed/disappeared in December of 2020 sometime (like barely I can currently make out where it was, without trying to pretend I'm seeing it). For whatever reason, that took some time to clear up (I'd lost hope for it). However, I'm not 100% that's a great sign as that's around the time I feel like my overall negative PI's started to hit their max in being tested by my PE approach. So, I can't help but wonder if it "healing" (disappearing) is a comment to things related to blood flow in the head/glans, or lack thereof.
- Slight raised "band" appearance from side to side just beneath the rim/edge/bottom of the glans head, in the really thin layer of skin that exists there. I hate that I'm mentioning it out loud somewhere for the first time, but that did appear sometime mid or later last year. Like September? I had to look into Penile Mondor's disease...to maybe rule something out. I'd be willing to share a pic of this area with a seasoned pro on here.

KEY NEGATIVE REPORT
I was in bed with a girl early February of this year, making it the first time in about 2 years with a girl (I.e. First time about to have sex 1.5 years into starting PE), and I was unable to really get it up for vaginal sex. I could get hard during the blowjob, but my penis wouldn't stay hard for penetrative sex. It is worth noting that this girl was brand new to me, as was also the nature of a quicker moving sexual engagement (normally I get to know the person), but let's be real, folks: I had been coming from quite a long dryspell, I'd never been more sexual in my mind than in all of that dryspell (especially with increasing my penis size on my brain, and all the subsequent horn thoughts to follow). So this ED should not have happened, certainly at least not to this extent. After this sex engagement (the same girl and I tried a second time, too, to no real difference - if anything it was worse than the first), I began to have real, true doubts about me doing PE. Understandably.

I will be going to a urologist (one who's not dense on the matter) in the near future to check up on everything, including but not limited to taking a cavernosogram and hormone test. Probably after the coronavirus subsides some.

The query is basic: What things should I be doing and not be doing to allow my penis to heal?

The things I've wondered about...

- Should I apply vitamin E oil to my penis regularly? Any other oils/creams I should be aware of?
- Should I seek any prescription medicine? What about "Verapamil" that I've heard of?
- Should I "heat wrap" with a rice sock regularly? What about cold therapy?
- Should I continue kegeling? Reverse kegeling?
- Should I buy a quality red light to expose my penis to?
- Should I be looking at supplements such as Acetyl-L-Carnitine ("ALCAR") for purported nerve healing benefits and L-Lysine for tissue health? Any other supplements I should be aware of?
- Should I continue to wear the Stealth Innerwear in this time of stopping PE? It's what my penis is used to, after all, for about a year.
- Should I routinely view porn without touching myself? While engaging only 'mentally' (so to arouse myself). This is a curious one. I stopped viewing porn for PE (albeit with a lot of struggling at times). But, truthfully, I'm inclined to resume some aspect of using porn in this new phase for me.
- Should I suspend myself from masturbation for a week and note the progress (while doing any other recovery methods)? Take it to two weeks, etc.?

I think the fact that I was so inconsistent at certain times over my course of PE was actually somewhat of a saving grace to where I am now - inconsistent in my PE schedule or more so in my technique (or lack thereof). Also, the countless times I'd find myself edging more than actually jelqing, when I intended to just jelq. I wonder what, in my case, caused more of where I am now. The manual stretching or jelqing.

Ideally, I'd like to keep my gains as much as I can, so it wasn't all for nothing, but I don't care about the gains if it means less of a recovery to the inner structures of my penis. All of the anatomical terms inside, those that I do not know.

Thank you all in advance for any help or earnest advice.

I will update this thread with how my penis fares from here on out.

__________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ ______

I want to end with something else...

Anyone reading in on this who's thinking about starting PE, that has an already-healthy penis (for all intents and purposes): Become extremely noteworthy of how your penis looks and feels to the touch in the present day, the present moment, on what is day 0 (flaccid state and erect) of you with PE. Truly, literally anything that comes to your mind, I want you to descriptively write that all down, look it over, and keep that log current/up-to-date as you start your PE journey, should you really want to begin it.

The accuracy in your notes and increased self-awareness will save you from very serious stress, and prevent you from incurring potentially very real damage done to your penis (permanent damage or temporary). Damage and injuries CAN happen to you, you've seen the posts that scare you, the thread titles, etc. Please just sincerely know that you are not excluded from having a "whoopsie". I don't care about your doubts ("Can't happen to me"), and neither does your penis.

You are doing something new and not exactly natural to your penis' normal way of simply existing. You either will perform the exercises safely and wisely in how you react to your penis' reactions to the exercises, or you will fall short, and pay for it somehow. Be smart. Trust your gut as you go through the new endeavor that is PE. The keenness of your gut also will develop more and more as you move forward, so keep in check with it.

PE can work good for you, maybe even exceptionally good, or it might be a mistake. SAFETY FIRST in anything you decide to do. It truly cannot be stressed enough. Ask yourself routinely, if you've been safe and calm with your dick or rough and reckless.

Follow the PE guidelines you find online to a tee, keep a log, be smart, know it's going to take a long while (but do so many things that you want in life), and enjoy each session's progress.

If any newbies want to PM me for anything based on my story above, please feel free. I'm here to be transparent. I'll try to check in here weekly (or maybe I'll just set up e-mail notifications).

Edit: As of this posting, I am going to cease wearing the Stealth Innerwear. Call it weird timing or just my awareness to it not (or my penis size as of lately), but even the bigger size of Stealth Innerwear I have is causing slight purple hue in the skin tone of the foreskin while in use.

[CUSP82]

Well let me get to one issue first. You can get hard for a blowjob but when you try to penetrate you can't. Physically what do you think the difference is?

[Gnicbom]

Well let me get to one issue first. You can get hard for a blowjob but when you try to penetrate you can't. Physically what do you think the difference is?

I do in fact feel more aroused at just the thought of a blowjob. Always kinda have (since the first time I got one as a young'n, which was actually months after vaginal sex). But I never had an actual issue of erection for penetrative sex before.

Edit: I feel a mouth alone is, technically speaking, more pleasing than how a vagina feels. As far as I know at this present time. Maybe it's the act as well, of being pleasured, and not having to do anything. Just be.

[CUSP82]

Physically there is no difference. They are both warm soft wet environments aren't they? Mentally there is a big difference. With a bj all a guy has to do is lay there and moan a bit a relax and enjoy. Now with penetration well they guy has to "perform" right? Now the pressure, mental pressure, is on the guy. No pressure in getting a good bj is there?

[Pegasus]

While the biggest cause of ed is anxiety especially with a new partner I will be very interested in the hormone numbers .
Do not accept "fine or normal" post the actual numbers .

[Gnicbom]

Physically there is no difference. They are both warm soft wet environments aren't they? Mentally there is a big difference. With a bj all a guy has to do is lay there and moan a bit a relax and enjoy. Now with penetration well they guy has to "perform" right? Now the pressure, mental pressure, is on the guy. No pressure in getting a good bj is there?

Exactly... I know where you're going with this (I'd edited my post at the time you replied). There IS indeed psychological factor at play, I will never discount that, even for how horny I was in my dryspell, to be able to be next to a naked girl after so long, the psychological factor is real.

The situation with that girl was highly suspect though... My hard-on after the blowjob subsided so much and so rather quickly, once it was time for penetrative sex. That's the key part.

Edit: If I'm thinking back to the situation a bit closer (it takes effort to because it wasn't exactly a pleasant memory), my hard-on achieved from the blowjob wasn't a 'diamond cutter' or anything close to the best of the best. It was there, it was good, but not phenomenal. So please let me make that part clearer.

For what it's worth, I should likely be seeing myself with that girl again in the near'ish future, and, if I'm feeling up to trying again (you know when you know), I'll tell her we should try again (she left it up to me after two basically failed attempts, at least in the penis department). In which case, I'll report back here with what happened.

[Gnicbom]

While the biggest cause of ed is anxiety especially with a new partner I will be very interested in the hormone numbers .
Do not accept "fine or normal" post the actual numbers .

I will happily post the exact numbers. You've seen me to be detail oriented before and I will not spare any omission with the hormone numbers (and anything else I find out from doctor visits going forward), once I am tested. Thank you.

[solidlength]

I would like to throw out there, the only times I've ever experienced ED in the moment was with a brand new partner that wasn't a hookup. I.E. we're in a relationship and the time comes to become intimate. Those are the only times I haven't gotten hard and it was totally psychological. Time passed and things would be fine, its almost like my brain/penis are like "wait this isn't the vagina we're expecting."

Just my two cents on that note.

[Gnicbom]

I would like to throw out there, the only times I've ever experienced ED in the moment was with a brand new partner that wasn't a hookup. I.E. we're in a relationship and the time comes to become intimate. Those are the only times I haven't gotten hard and it was totally psychological. Time passed and things would be fine, its almost like my brain/penis are like "wait this isn't the vagina we're expecting."

Just my two cents on that note.

That makes sense. *nods* I appreciate all the cents going forward. Thanks, guy.

The situation was at least suspect for me, due to the fact she was my first partner since long after commencing PE (I'd had two sex partners before her, no issues comparable to this). So it is what it is. I have to call it out how I see it. It might have been purely psychological, yes, or it might have been that in a mix of my penis' developed state, in all that has become to date. Time may tell.

[Big Al]

Anxiety towards PIV (Penis In Vagina) sex is usually rated at the top of specific performance anxiety types. This is because performance is expected- whereas oral sex is more of a passive event.