I want to tell a story today, my story. I have no one I can talk to about this issues, this place is the only place where I can vent to people who can understand my cursed situation.
I'm a young black man, very good looking and in shape. Have a good social life and a moderate social circle. In my social circle I'm know as the ladies man, I'm usually the one who gets with most women and as a result of this I've slept with more than a hundred girls.
I've never thought much of it, I was just fulfilling my sexual desires and stroking my enormous ego. Until one day the reality started creeping in... maybe I have a penis that is considered small by a lot of girls. At first I didn't believe it, I had this thought at the back of my mind for a long time but I never fully succumbed to it. Maybe my ego was putting me in denial but I just refused to believe I was small, even when girls were mocking me to my face I was still refusing to accept the facts. I was thinking it was just spiteful insults done by women to insult my fragile ego.
Years went by, my confidence in bed was slowly growing but the truth was too obvious for me to escape. You guys probably know the stereotypes around black guys, and girls my age sleep around a lot more compared to previous generation so they quickly find out what's the ideal size. Well, it turns out I'm not the ideal size... In fact I'm considered small.
My decline started this summer, slept with a few girls in a row and been called small and refused further sex by 2-3 girls in a short time span. Was this a new occurrence ? My ego kept telling me yes, but the truth is that this has always been my reality. I'm only able to have sex once with most girls I deal with, after the first time I either get blocked or just messed around with excuses to why they can't meet again. It wasn't until I sat down and forced myself to be honest that I realised that there was definitely something wrong, I had no problem sleeping with women but I found it impossible to keep a fuck buddy. Something was up... And I had to confirm my doubts... Which I did.
Recently I started contacting girls I slept with in the past and asking explanation as to why they don't want to entertain sex with me anymore (Pathetic I know, but I had to know the truth). Keep in mind that most girls never initially admitted the problem was my size so that fueled my ignorance over the issue. After pressing and insisting, most girls admitted that I was too small for them. A few told me I was the smallest they have ever been with. Now u can imagine how this felt, especially to a guy who was living in denial and was convinced of having a good size. Admission after admission, I became addicted to contacting previous partner and confirming this pattern. Well... The results have been clear. And today I received another few confirmations...
My ego is crushed and I'm depressed, I don't even have the strength to follow PE routines. Which is ironic because this experience should motivate me to take PE seriously. I have lost the will to pursue most activities and I've became a shell of my former self.
The truth is that I feel like I've been defeated and already lost. Who knows how many times I've been mocked by girls during sleep overs ? My crushed ego doesn't even allow me to sleep or function normally, I have been broken and ridiculed for most of my life without even being aware of it.
Sorry for the long post... just wanted to rant to people, if you've read this far I thank you for your time. Hopefully my story doesn't depress you like it does to me. Please if u have experiences to share feel free...
It's over for me.
My size is 5.5 nbel 5.5 eg
I'm a young black man, very good looking and in shape. Have a good social life and a moderate social circle. In my social circle I'm know as the ladies man, I'm usually the one who gets with most women and as a result of this I've slept with more than a hundred girls.
I've never thought much of it, I was just fulfilling my sexual desires and stroking my enormous ego. Until one day the reality started creeping in... maybe I have a penis that is considered small by a lot of girls. At first I didn't believe it, I had this thought at the back of my mind for a long time but I never fully succumbed to it. Maybe my ego was putting me in denial but I just refused to believe I was small, even when girls were mocking me to my face I was still refusing to accept the facts. I was thinking it was just spiteful insults done by women to insult my fragile ego.
Years went by, my confidence in bed was slowly growing but the truth was too obvious for me to escape. You guys probably know the stereotypes around black guys, and girls my age sleep around a lot more compared to previous generation so they quickly find out what's the ideal size. Well, it turns out I'm not the ideal size... In fact I'm considered small.
My decline started this summer, slept with a few girls in a row and been called small and refused further sex by 2-3 girls in a short time span. Was this a new occurrence ? My ego kept telling me yes, but the truth is that this has always been my reality. I'm only able to have sex once with most girls I deal with, after the first time I either get blocked or just messed around with excuses to why they can't meet again. It wasn't until I sat down and forced myself to be honest that I realised that there was definitely something wrong, I had no problem sleeping with women but I found it impossible to keep a fuck buddy. Something was up... And I had to confirm my doubts... Which I did.
Recently I started contacting girls I slept with in the past and asking explanation as to why they don't want to entertain sex with me anymore (Pathetic I know, but I had to know the truth). Keep in mind that most girls never initially admitted the problem was my size so that fueled my ignorance over the issue. After pressing and insisting, most girls admitted that I was too small for them. A few told me I was the smallest they have ever been with. Now u can imagine how this felt, especially to a guy who was living in denial and was convinced of having a good size. Admission after admission, I became addicted to contacting previous partner and confirming this pattern. Well... The results have been clear. And today I received another few confirmations...
My ego is crushed and I'm depressed, I don't even have the strength to follow PE routines. Which is ironic because this experience should motivate me to take PE seriously. I have lost the will to pursue most activities and I've became a shell of my former self.
The truth is that I feel like I've been defeated and already lost. Who knows how many times I've been mocked by girls during sleep overs ? My crushed ego doesn't even allow me to sleep or function normally, I have been broken and ridiculed for most of my life without even being aware of it.
Sorry for the long post... just wanted to rant to people, if you've read this far I thank you for your time. Hopefully my story doesn't depress you like it does to me. Please if u have experiences to share feel free...
It's over for me.
My size is 5.5 nbel 5.5 eg
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