Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Im 19 and feeling depressed about PE

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Im 19 and feeling depressed about PE

    Hi, ill try to keep this short. I first had sex when i was 18 and i came in under a minute. Since then i have only had sex 4 times and each time can only last a few strokes until i bust. This is putting a toll on my relationship and starting to depress me because i may lose my girlfriend of 4 years.

    Im curious is this an issue or is there a period of getting used to sex where the first few times go quickly? I know when i first receive oral from current gf i busted in seconds and now can last as long as i please. Im hoping this is a similar situation i just see no hope for my sexual future.

    Any advice would be appreciated, thank you!

  • #2
    Many threads about your problem. Do like my roommate, bang them twice if you are to fast the first time. We use to call my roommate the two minute man. He got older and the problem went away. He would just have sex multiple times with women in around the same time period.
    WIItard
    Senior Member
    Last edited by WIItard; 08-19-2017, 09:53 PM.
    7 1/4 inches x 5 1/4 inches Spring 2014
    8 X 5 1/2 late summer 2014
    8 X 5 3/4 Feb. 2015 That took a while.
    8 X 6 goal
    8 X 5 7/8 May 2015, wife said stop for now.

    Comment


    • #3
      I was going to say read the stickies , But I see you are having a lend tou say you have had a gf 4 years but only had sex 4 times.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by Pegasus View Post
        I was going to say read the stickies , But I see you are having a lend tou say you have had a gf 4 years but only had sex 4 times.
        ...maybe he started sex 'late'. The kid's only 19. That means he started dating this girl at 15. People can date in high school.

        At OP:
        Yes, it can fix itself on its own, like blowjobs did. Unfortunately, that is relatively unlikely to happen - especially if you have mounting anxiety, which itself will be normal.

        As a first step, let your girlfriend know that you're thinking about this and want to improve it. Don't frame it as that you're worried about your relationship -- this'll put pressure on her -- but that you want to help her and you feel better. Ask her if she wants to help you by training with plateau edging (find the link on this site by ammonite(?)). This can be through blowjobs or handjobs or heavy petting. Don't be afraid to finish this way, if you last longer here, do it.

        Second step - Return the favor. Get good at eating her out. Look up Nina Hartley as an instructional video when you have time (Noooot safe for work).

        Those two steps will at least mostly salvage your sex life, while you work on the things that'll take more time.

        Third step - try to identify which positions you last longer during. If you can find two or three that are reliable, it'll feel ridiculous, but you can switch between them every few seconds. Don't be afraid of pulling out to catch your breath.

        Fourth step - When identifying the positions you DONT last long in, try to figure out why. Usually, IMO, this can be a muscle weakness or tightness that could be strengthened / stretched. Yoga around your hips region is good.

        Beyond all of that, we have a ton of resources here onsite. Read the stickies, look up Minuteman's Dry Multiple Male Orgasm post if that appeals to you, and most of all, put in the work. This'll take time to fix.

        Comment


        • #5
          The key will be to relax. You are finally doing it and you want to keep doing it and you have been waiting so long to do it and you want to be good at doing it and you just can't believe your doing it and. . Relax, and enjoy it. Train as the post above suggests. But relax.
          ALL THE WAY WITH GOOD OLE JAY!

          Comment


          • #6
            What's your diet & physical fitness level, OP? Do you work out regularly in the Gym? You'll find your stamina will improve DRASTICALLY, once you develop a regular gym habit and eat healthier! It works well for most healthy guys. You'll feel better, which will build your confidence as you build your body and strength. You got some good advice above^^^, particularly from Throwaway on the basic knowledge, and Wishful on your mindset. Add in some physical fitness to the mix to relieve stress and enhance your libido, and you'll find your confidence level will rebound tremendously, I'm betting!

            Comment


            • #7
              Thank you all for the helpful advice. You're correct in that we waited because we both come from Christian families so it was hard to find alone time to actually have sex. So those 4 times were very spread out.

              Im very tall and skinny, played basketball in high school and ate well, but as soon as i went to college i started eating unhealthy and stopped working out, still just as skinny though. I will take your advice on working out and building some confidence. Im very stressed due to family issues and college issues so that along with worrying about PE could be a big contributor.

              As far as positions go i will do my best whenever I get another opportunity at sex. Im not sure if this is TMI or not but my girlfriend is very tight so some positions hurt her just trying to get it in. Therefore we have only really tried doggy. Once again i appreciate all the help and support, all I want is a healthy sex life so I can one day have a great girlfriend/wife so the advice means a lot and i will get to working on the things everyone has said.

              Comment


              • #8
                Tryblicking her vagina before sticking it next time.
                ALL THE WAY WITH GOOD OLE JAY!

                Comment


                • #9
                  We have used lube and plenty of it, as well as her being very wet. Ive been with her for 4 years so I dont know how tight is actually tight since she is my only experience in that area. But two fingers, although they can fit, is often uncomfortable for her In certain positions.
                  BigJ1997
                  Junior Member
                  Last edited by BigJ1997; 08-21-2017, 12:03 AM.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Also, if its any help I used a fleshlight STU model a few times and could last around 15 minutes of thrusting with a few short breaks. So I'm not sure if my PE is just a mental/overexcitement thing.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Do you take breaks during sex? The same as with the STU?
                      ALL THE WAY WITH GOOD OLE JAY!

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Id like too, but at least in the one position we have tried i get to the point of no return in a matter of a few strokes whereas with the STU i could go for 6 to 7 mins before needing a break to calm myself. I figure its not pleasurable for her if i pull out every 5 strokes to calm down.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by BigJ1997 View Post
                          Id like too, but at least in the one position we have tried i get to the point of no return in a matter of a few strokes whereas with the STU i could go for 6 to 7 mins before needing a break to calm myself. I figure its not pleasurable for her if i pull out every 5 strokes to calm down.
                          You need to learn to RELAX! Your anxiety (and your GF's too) is responsible for 99% of your problems. She's not wet enough for sex and you're not experienced in how to pleasure a female in foreplay well enough to be confident having sex. Try deep breathing exercises, learn foreplay techniques (fingers, tongue), and PRACTICE TOGETHER, without the pressure of having penetrative sex. I bet you'll BOTH loosen up and "get the hang of it" after a few sessions! Learn to edge INSTEAD of masturbating to build your stamina and PRACTICE using stop/start technique to control your pre-E.
                          jockinthebox
                          Retired Moderator
                          Member of the Month May 2015
                          PEGym Hero
                          Last edited by jockinthebox; 08-21-2017, 12:42 AM.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            try reverse kegals during sex or deep breathing techniques. what i do if i wanna last long is ill take in a deep breathe and hold it for 1-2 seconds and just focus on breathing. also during the sex just dont think about sex at all...mind distractions can add time. then again ive never had PE in my life so i dont know what it's like for you.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Thank you all ill be sure to out your advice into practice. As far as what its like for me anyway I could get it in and take it slow just fine but in an instant for some unknown reason after a few strokes everything feels overwhelming and i get to the point of no return. While the insertion and a few slow strokes i don't feel like ill ever finish from this. Its hard to explain

                              Comment

                              Working...
                              X