Losing hope

[just_let_go Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close just_let_go]

Hi everyone, I'm new to the forums and this is where I'm at...

I have struggled with PE for pretty much the entire time I've been dating. Lately it's been worse than ever. I'm at a point where my anxiety gets SO bad before we've even started that I finish pretty much as soon as I put it in. I seem to get so tense and up tight, so much that I can't even seen to get a deep breath in.

• I've been doing kegal exercises for about a year
• I try to practise edging, but can never successfully return from PONR
• Been meditating and learning breathing exercises for 4 years
• Even bought a "fleshlight" to try and train myself on
• I've spoken to my girlfriend about it
• I've seen a sex therapist (too be honest she just recommended priligy and anti depressants)

I could probably think of more. Point being, none of this seems to matter once the anxiety kicks in. Once that takes over I can't breath, can't relax and it's game over.

I guess my question for the forums... Is there something I'm missing? It's like as soon as I start touching her now the anxiety kicks in and I can't get it back. Close to just giving up

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

Tell me about the reverse kegel part of your routine , the massage forms you use and the pelvic area stretching you have done .
How don you progress you edging forms?

[just_let_go Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close just_let_go]

I don't really have a routine. I use an app and try to do 3 lots of kegals a day, but I don't really do much reverse kegal stuff. I try to push out while having sex (like trying to pee) as i heard this helps. I haven't really kept any progress of my kegals or pelvic stretching.

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

Kegels without reverse kegel (rk) are often counterproductive ,

The trying to pee thing sounds like a rk attempt during sex .

I suggest you start a rk routine out of sex . A progressive edging routine begin with stop/start and work up to plateau edging before you even consider kegel or rk edging forms .

A stretching routine for the pelvic area including the pelvic floor .

A massage routine like tennsi ball or trigger point .

Start a progress thread .

You will have to also work on anxiety/arousal etc but that is not my area.

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

Here is a link regarding stretches . Start with the basic Hindi squat.

https://www.pegym.com/forums/prematu...ber-input.html

[just_let_go Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close just_let_go]

Thanks Pegasus,

Would a routine like this be okay?

At least 10 minutes of start stop per day
Change my kegal stuff to a balance of Mediatative RK and normal K (after a break)
Do this every day: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jxWO...ature=youtu.be
Start a progress thread

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

Here is some info on rk . I rarely suggest this but stop doing kegel for a little while.



Reverse kegel for newbie ( yes, that's me )

Confusion with Reverse Kegels

Reverse Kegel Breathing (Meditative Reverse Kegels)

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

Later on we can talk about posture and posterior chain

[just_let_go Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close just_let_go]

Great, that was an informative read. I like the sound of mediative RK as It tackles my anxiety too, I'll try this with edging too. Does the above rough plan look like a good start to you?

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

Thanks Pegasus,

Would a routine like this be okay?

At least 10 minutes of start stop per day
Change my kegal stuff to a balance of Mediatative RK and normal K (after a break)
Do this every day: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jxWO...ature=youtu.be
Start a progress thread

A balanced k/rk routine is off in your future at this point.
Stop start is good keep back from the ponr at first .
Psoas strech is ok but include Hindi squat

[just_let_go Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close just_let_go]

A balanced k/rk routine is off in your future at this point.

Do you mean don't do any of this for now?
And how often and long should I be doing this hindi squat?

Cheers

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

You have overdone k by the look and should give it a rest for a few weeks.

[MrLoverLover Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close MrLoverLover]

Try some Pau Yuen Tong, its a chinese balm made to help with premature ejaculation. Nothing helped me for close to 2 years until Ive found this stuff. Apply small amounts to frenulum and other trigger points. Makes my stamina A LOT better.

this also made me believe that managing a lot of stimulation on the glans is the solution for pre e, at least for me. And reading through other, older posts on this forum others have benefitet a lot from it too!

[just_let_go Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close just_let_go]

Try some Pau Yuen Tong, its a chinese balm made to help with premature ejaculation. Nothing helped me for close to 2 years until Ive found this stuff. Apply small amounts to frenulum and other trigger points. Makes my stamina A LOT better.

this also made me believe that managing a lot of stimulation on the glans is the solution for pre e, at least for me. And reading through other, older posts on this forum others have benefitet a lot from it too!

Worth a shot I guess! Where would you recommend getting this from?

Also Pegasus, sorry to keep nagging you, but are there any programs I can download for PE? Like a daily routine?

[TheZZMan Moderator Member of the Month Sept 2018PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close TheZZMan]

To me, the object of Edging is to fail, lots of times. Push yourself hard and try different things to try to control the PONR. If you are not pushing the limit, it is just masturbation with a pause now and then, you have not learned anything. You can slow down when the PONR gets close, but you need to experience getting past it a little at a time. It is OK to fail, it drives the learning process. We all get over excited at times, it is natural. Learning to control that takes dedication and a want to succeed.