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2018: a penis odyssey (Depression, PIED, PE escpecially).

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  • 2018: a penis odyssey (Depression, PIED, PE escpecially).

    For those struggling with depression, PE, PIED.
    2018: a penis odyssey.

    This thread will be a written account for myself and my penis, lets call her Jhene (Juh-nae), and our trials, tribulations, progress, and hopefully one day, ride off into the sunset.

    Lets start with introductions,
    I'm 20 years old, Asian/Caucasian descent, almost 6'1", 160lbs trying to reach 175, pretty active, very fast metabolism. Jhene, my penis, (for those of you wondering) is about 5.5", pushing 6" on a really good day.

    This is my story,
    I lost my virginity in high school during a V drunk hookup, it only lasted a minute or two but thats normal I guess. My sexual experience since then has been limited to several other DRUNK highschool one night stands, more or less the same as the first with the exception of a relationship that I'll get to later. After graduation I moved down to So Cal for University in 2016/17. Looking in hindsight I think I've always been depressed but loosing my friends and support group from my hometown took a toll on me during my first year at college. I stopped talking to people. I experimented with different drugs (amphetamines, xans, leannn, alc, and a lot of THC). I became addicted to porn and I'd masturbate often several times a day in my room to it. This was an extremely destructive lifestyle that compounded my depression and severely fucked up how my brain looked for dopamine. I had severe anxiety attacks and irrational fits of paranoia in the middle of the night and it was only getting worse. In May of 2017 I took an unknown amount of LSD (I reckon it to have been ~ 400-500 micrograms) and fell into complete and utter ego death (In case your confused here's a random account of an ego death: https://the-numinous.com/ego-death/ ). The following day I felt almost cured of my depression, with a newfound enthusiasm for life that persists in some ways to this day. I was so happy to be alive and grateful that I didn't kill myself. ***DISCLAIMER*** I do not advocate the use of lsd, ESPECIALLY if you are depressed. I was lucky with how my situation unfolded and well aware that it easily could've turned out much worse. Lsd did not cure my depression. *** Anyways, my bad habits fell by the wayside as I went home for the summer. I went stone cold sober for the summer and stopped masturbating/watching porn. Not because I wanted to per say, but because I was literally high off life and didn't feel the desire to.

    When I got back to school in September I started seeing this girl, she was absolutely gorgeous, to this day I swear I've never seen a more beautiful woman in my life. We got along insanely well it was almost scary how well we clicked. BUT, there was a problem. When it came down to making a move I felt as if there was never an opportunity. Come to think of it I felt like making a move was almost a chore. Eventually she got more sexually aggressive but when we finally lied down together to FUCK.. I couldn't get Jhene (my penis) up. At all. For my life. I felt awful, completely demasculated, and inadequate as a man. We stopped seeing each other romantically after that but we stayed friends... I did my research and found that my swift withdrawal from porn after to my porn addiction resulted in a flatline, in short I was asexual, at least for the time being. This sucked because it made me realize how much I actually liked this girl. I mean our relationship, at least on my end was based off of pure emotional intimacy, that's nuts. I was determined to break out of this asexuality. I continued to research the issue and found that the only way out of PIED and the Asexual flatline was to live an EXTREMELY healthy lifestyle, to ride the flatline out until desire naturally returned, and to NOT WATCH PORN OR MASTURBATE when this desire returned. So thats exactly what I did. For months I did everything I could to naturally boost testosterone. I went to the gym when I could 3-5 times a week, I took cold showers, I ate a fuckton and as healthy as I could cutting sugar almost entirely and reducing salt. I also started taking Libido boosting supplements like L argentine and Ginko Baloba.

    Eventually, after about 5 months (this would make my total flatline about 8 mf months long) it began to creep back. I felt more confident and hanging out with the girl from earlier was a bit more electric. I ended up spending the night at her place in April. Everything was going fantastic and I felt Jhene (my penis) standing at attention ready to go. I pulled her out but as soon as this girl touched my dick to guide it inside her I came. So hard. So unexpectedly... Wow. It was so embarrassing she had to big spoon me to sleep. It took me almost a year to conquer PIED just for Premature Ejaculation to come in and start its reign of terror on my sex life. PE became the issue for the next several weeks. I honestly never lasted more than 15 seconds despite my best efforts, even in round 2. A couple weeks ago I asked her if she wanted to take our relationship to the next step and make it official.. She said that, as a really physically loving person, we wouldn't work out. I appreciate her honesty and I don't blame her. It's not her responsibility to nurse my dick back to health. We're still friends but, its different now. I don't know, excuse me for being emotional.

    THAT BRINGS US TO TODAY.
    For the past two weeks I've been edging without porn every couple days, and Reverse Kegeling throughout like a mf. I try to reach the PONR without ejaculating but I usually cum just because its too hard not too. After getting hard Jhene (my penis) can last about 15-20 seconds before she busts. I've found marginal improvement in identifying my PONR and stopping involuntary kegels but its still difficult to not cum when it only takes a few seconds to get me to that point.

    How I intend to cure Jhene (my penis) from her PE.

    1. Starting tomorrow I will be doing Yoga in the morning to quell my pelvic floor muscles. In addition I will meditate for 15 minutes lying down RK'ing when I inhale and relaxing when I exhale.

    2. I'll try to edge for as long as possible every couple days w/o ejaculating. I aim to only reach ejaculation only once per week

    3. I'll step up my time in the GYM and focus on squats, deadlifts, and core to support my pelvic floor muscles.

    4. Work up the confidence to make sexy moves despite the fact that I know damn well I'll probably last less than a minute.

    4. Revised, Make sure my head game is A.1.

    Fin. ***I intend to update this thread weekly. Feel free to ask any questions especially about PIED/flatline bc I feel like I can help there. I hope that this thread will be helpful to somebody!***

  • #2
    Continue to edge and push the PONR. When you get there, try different things to try to work through it. May be a kegel, may be clenching down, for me, it is a relaxing of the pelvic floor so that the sensation fades into the background and I can move forward. If you just stroke and go, you have learned nothing, you need to focus, feel and adjust, both your intensity and your grip. Find the sweet spot and experiment with it. Learn to control. You can do it, a lot of members here have done it, so have faith that you too can overcome.

    Comment


    • #3
      Hey, welcome to your journey. In my opinion it is good that you joined! Talking about it and keeping track of your progress most certainly will help a lot!

      What i want to say about this problem:
      The thing with your GF first: I had a similar relationship and trust me this girl is wise for not getting you in a relationship because at the moment your problems may destroy it. If you overcome this problem you are on good terms with her. That means there is hope if both of you want it.

      If you want to tackle this problem really seriously i would recommend doing a bloodtest that checks for:

      -Histamine
      -Vitamin B6
      -Magnesium
      -Zink
      -Serotonin
      -Gaba
      -Viamin D
      -nitric oxide

      to see if you have a deficiency that makes your muscle uncontrollable.

      Also in your journey your own attitude and anxiety levels will play a huge role in whether you will be successful or not

      Good luck with the stretching and so on, if it is only a tight PV that would be the best case!
      “Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Wishing is not enough; we must do.”
      – Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

      My Journey on Premature Ejaculation

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by ZeNigmar View Post
        Hey, welcome to your journey. In my opinion it is good that you joined! Talking about it and keeping track of your progress most certainly will help a lot!

        What i want to say about this problem:
        The thing with your GF first: I had a similar relationship and trust me this girl is wise for not getting you in a relationship because at the moment your problems may destroy it. If you overcome this problem you are on good terms with her. That means there is hope if both of you want it.

        If you want to tackle this problem really seriously i would recommend doing a bloodtest that checks for:

        -Histamine
        -Vitamin B6
        -Magnesium
        -Zink
        -Serotonin
        -Gaba
        -Viamin D
        -nitric oxide

        to see if you have a deficiency that makes your muscle uncontrollable.

        Also in your journey your own attitude and anxiety levels will play a huge role in whether you will be successful or not

        Good luck with the stretching and so on, if it is only a tight PV that would be the best case!
        Unfortunately there's no easy way to accurately test for neurotransmitters like serotonin and GABA, and even then, it's not a simple matter of "boosting" these neurotransmitters up. It's much more complex than that and you can run into issues with down regulation if you use supplements or drugs that alter their levels over the longer term. (For example, people who use SSRI's often have to increase the dosage over time to get the same effect, and if/when they do come off, their PE may end up even worse than before)

        A high quality zinc citrate (15-30mg daily) and magnesium citrate (200-400mg daily) probably wouldn't hurt though (I use these personally) especially if you weight train consistently, as they're drained from the body through sweating.

        Vitamin D can be accurately tested for and the majority of people in the west have below optimal levels, though I don't know how much of an effect this has on PE. I've supplemented with it for years to keep my levels up and haven't noticed any difference with it.

        Comment


        • #5
          Oh, i dont know so much about how this stuff gets tested in blood levels.

          Dopamin and Serotonin is a topic that is still not completely discovered through research and the link between SSRIs and the dopamin/serotonin-balance is more or less a guess as far as i know.

          I wouldn't mess with SSRIs either! But in some cases supplementing things already helped people in this forum!
          I saw one that went to a doctor and got diagnosed with an extreme B6 and Zinc deficiency and that pretty much cured his PE. I am not a doctor so i can only give hints on what the roots to the symptom could be.

          Did you try HTP-5 for Serotonin? An SSRI is way more dangerous than that supplement i would guess as it agressively inhibits functions in your dopamin Serotonin balance.

          I've red that if you increase one of these your brain will produce more of the other to follow up for balance.
          My guess is that testosteron, estrogen, histamine, cortisol and Serotonin are the most important factors in your brain/blood.

          Personally i think most cases are a mix of everything, tight PF, mental anxiety, arousement-control and brain chemistry, so supplementing should not be harmful if you consume objectively and work on all factors. Especially because supplementing (if you have the money) can help other areas of life too, i have mild insomnia for example. I can only guess again but i think that may be because of a lack of Melatonin (followup to Serotonin) or due to high histamine because often my heart is starting to race at night and i have a mildly higher blood pressure than normally. I started to eat 1/2 onion and 1/4 garlic trying to flush it, lets see!
          “Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Wishing is not enough; we must do.”
          – Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

          My Journey on Premature Ejaculation

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by ZeNigmar View Post
            Oh, i dont know so much about how this stuff gets tested in blood levels.

            Dopamin and Serotonin is a topic that is still not completely discovered through research and the link between SSRIs and the dopamin/serotonin-balance is more or less a guess as far as i know.

            I wouldn't mess with SSRIs either! But in some cases supplementing things already helped people in this forum!
            I saw one that went to a doctor and got diagnosed with an extreme B6 and Zinc deficiency and that pretty much cured his PE. I am not a doctor so i can only give hints on what the roots to the symptom could be.

            Did you try HTP-5 for Serotonin? An SSRI is way more dangerous than that supplement i would guess as it agressively inhibits functions in your dopamin Serotonin balance.

            I've red that if you increase one of these your brain will produce more of the other to follow up for balance.
            My guess is that testosteron, estrogen, histamine, cortisol and Serotonin are the most important factors in your brain/blood.

            Personally i think most cases are a mix of everything, tight PF, mental anxiety, arousement-control and brain chemistry, so supplementing should not be harmful if you consume objectively and work on all factors. Especially because supplementing (if you have the money) can help other areas of life too, i have mild insomnia for example. I can only guess again but i think that may be because of a lack of Melatonin (followup to Serotonin) or due to high histamine because often my heart is starting to race at night and i have a mildly higher blood pressure than normally. I started to eat 1/2 onion and 1/4 garlic trying to flush it, lets see!
            I'm not at all opposed to supplementation and use quite a few things myself (curcumin, ginger, garlic, green tea extract, fish oil, melatonin, various vitamins/minerals) but was just pointing out the difficulty/complexity in assessing issues with neurotransmitters.

            The reality is that chemical solutions are usually the fastest and easiest way to fix PE (and I see nothing inherently wrong with using them), but unfortunately I don't know of anything that produces the desired result WITHOUT side effects, and that doesn't have to be taken "on demand" (this is annoying and kind of ruins the spontaneity aspect). For example, a sufficient quantity of alcohol (8 drinks or more) basically cures me... dapoxetine cures me... DXM with tylenol also gave very significant results the couple times I tried it. Many guys report a huge effect from SSRI's, kratom and various other substances.. unfortunately all of these come with undesirable side effects and can't be used long term.

            If some kind of once-daily supplement or drug did exist that cured PE and was safe for long term use (similar to viagra or cialis for ED) I absolutely would use it without hesitation. But I'm not aware of anything that can accomplish this, so it's edging/ballooning/stretching/RK's/massage/natural supplements etc. at least for now

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Tooners88 View Post
              If some kind of once-daily supplement or drug did exist that cured PE and was safe for long term use (similar to viagra or cialis for ED) I absolutely would use it without hesitation. But I'm not aware of anything that can accomplish this, so it's edging/ballooning/stretching/RK's/massage/natural supplements etc. at least for now
              This once daily supplement may or may not exist for you. Reading through this forum, i heard some stories about guys that cured their problems with a supplement. Yes natural supplements of course are No1 because of longterm use. I basicly try everything at once and hope for something to work, if something does work along with the typical PreE training i cut out things until i am at the best work/efficiency balance. White wine also cures my PE and turns me into a kinky sex god.. its strange but its kinda like a desensitizer for your nerves i guess. And you are right short-term drugs are not the solution. It's trial and error. and MOTIVATION. My signature says it all :-p
              “Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Wishing is not enough; we must do.”
              – Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

              My Journey on Premature Ejaculation

              Comment


              • #8
                It's been about two weeks since I posted. Jhene (my penis) has made significant progress in edging. I can now edge, starting off for a minute or two stroking at a moderate - semi quick pace, and I'm able to better recognize the PONR. I've found that focusing on RKs while stroking somewhat triggers an involuntary kegel almost like activating any muscle in the pelvic floor contributes to an involuntary kegel and subsequent PONR. Simply focusing on keeping the region relaxed seems like the way to go. That being said, whenever I fantasize I find that I get EXTREMELY aroused and reach the PONR very quickly, around 20 seconds or so. I'm worried that even though I've made some progress physically that this mental barrier regarding arousal from fantasy will be extremely hard to overcome. On top of that I acquired a minor tear in my meniscus that will prevent me from squatting, deadlifting, and generally doing many pelvic floor stretches for several weeks or so..

                Does anybody have any tips on increasing my PONR control while fantasizing? Should I just focus on the physical aspects and not fantasize at all? Will an increase in my resistance to physical stimulation even translate to actual sex if I just get too turned on in the first place?

                Any and all advice is appreciated. Thanks!

                Comment


                • #9
                  Hey OP, congrats on your progress.

                  I suggest you read this post and comments and begun to implement the arousal controls technique that are talked about in this thread.

                  https://www.pegym.com/forums/prematu...-response.html

                  Good luck.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Something strange just happened.. Possible breakthrough?
                    I got home from work and hopped on this sight just to check out one of the stickies on arousal control that @Kakal directed me to. After that I started to browse previous threads to see if anybody had more tips regarding arousal control. Anyways I stumbled upon this thread:
                    https://www.pegym.com/forums/prematu...le-edging.html

                    @Tooners88 TLDR version of the post states: "(TLDR version: there is a spot on the glans around the peehole (mostly on the top side just below it) that, when stimulated, is extremely sensitive and uncomfortable to the touch. But, my experience was that if I desensitized this spot first for about 10 mins using circular motions with my palm, my ejaculatory response felt like it was essentially "shut off" afterwards when using my . I could go forever using the most arousing porn/sexual thoughts/thrusting motions, whereas normally I will orgasm within a minute).

                    Intrigued, I tried this for myself. Rubbing the spot created a squeamish feeling that ran to the base of my spine and further up.. its rather strange and uncomfortable. I kept stimulating the spot until the sensation peaked and at that point.. Jhene (my penis) just let out a short stream of.. piss? It was NOT pre cum or cum, it was just clear piss, I guess..? After that my erection deflated in rather spectacular fashion (I THINK bc i was so shocked at what just happened, surprise pee is always freaky but seriously does anybody know wtf happened?). ANYWAYS. I figured I should move on with my edging routine, and I found that Jhene's (my penis') stamina increased significantly. At this point in my odyssey I usually can edge for around 5 minutes, stroking in 15-30 second intervals, but this time I edged for around 10 minutes with my longest interval/split being 2 minutes.. With fantasy I can usually only last about 10-15 seconds before PONR but this time I was pushing about 40-60..

                    I figure, just as @
                    Tooners88 did before me. That there must be a correlation between stimulating this nerve on top of the penis head at the hole while erect prior to edging/sexual activity and sexual endurance and the delay of PONR. I'll try to experiment more on fussing with this nerve prior to edging.

                    Can anybody give an explanation for this squeamish response to stimulating the hole in this manner? Does it definitively aid in delaying PONR? Why TF did it make me pee? Any and all advice and or questions are welcome!

                    Thanks!

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Wait for Pegasus to hit your thread to say it's all mental, then thread will die

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Op i see you are working at it .

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Update!

                          It's been about 5 weeks since I started regularly edging for stamina and Jhene (my penis) and I have definitely made progress!! For the first couple weeks it was extremely difficult to last even 10 seconds, the PONR was essentially on a hair trigger and extremely difficult to recognize and prevent and as a result I ended up cumming during every edging sesh. I can now typically last about 2 minutes of stroking to fantasy before recognizing the PONR at which point I can successfully kegel to deter it and reverse kegel to bring my arousal down. Afterwards it takes me about 20-30 seconds of (stroking with fantasy) before I begin to reach the PONR again. I'm usually able to fight it off unless I get carried away in the fantasy lmaooo. With this newfound albeit meager stamina I've been able to prevent myself from cumming every day which I'm pretty sure has increased my erection strength. Also my knee (meniscus) injury has healed to the point where I could incorporate pelvic floor stretches into me and Jhene's (my penis') odyssey. Hopefully within two weeks I'll be in shape to start squatting and deadlifting.

                          Also yesterday I was able to last about 10 minutes of edging strait. It came out of nowhere and I can't tell exactly what allowed me to last so long... It could've been fatigue, as it was late and I had a longgg day at work but I don't really know.. I'm marking it as a fluke until I'm able to replicate the results/data. Oh my goodness I swear I sound like a SCHMEAT scientist this is COMEDY.

                          Anyways my routine rn is as follows:

                          10 Minutes meditation while laying on my back, lightly reverse kegeling on breaths in.

                          Stretching/Yoga routine relaxing the pelvic floor and breath control.

                          Reverse Kegels and Kegeling throughout the day. -- I try to hold a 10 second kegel and 20 second reverse kegel every time I think of my ex. Which is alot bc ya boy is a simp (((

                          Edging as long as I can everyday. I just reached the point where I can control my PONR enough to cum every other day so I'll try to do that. I mix in ballooning and different strokes, keep track of my breathing and arousal, and kegel and reverse kegel when applicable.

                          Also I'm looking to get freaaaaky with a fleshy light to prepare for the real thing ))) so if anybody has recommendations there in terms of texture vs realistic feel or just flashlight wisdom or whatever please lmk.

                          As always any and all feedback, advise, questions, or recommendations are welcome!!!
                          Thank you!

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Glad to hear you're making progress! Keep us posted.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              I've been keeping the same routine of edging, kegeling, reverse kegeling, and trying to do yoga every day. Any progress from my last update a week ago is too insignificant to really talk about. I've determined that arousal is the main issue for me as my problem isn't so much preventing myself from cumming when I feel the PONR coming it is actually the time from relative non arousal to PONR, If I focus hard on something else I can typically last quite a bit longer edging but as soon as I add auditory stimulation it draws the PONR in in just a matter of seconds. I'll keep grinding at it I guess. I'm assuming this is going to take months to beat..

                              I understand everybody is different but if anybody would be willing to share their progress/timeline I'd appreciate it!!

                              Comment

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