My quest to solving my life long PE

**TimeALWAYStells** · 03-09-2020

Originally Posted by Pegasus

Look I am an mmo master and I can have trouble controling ejaculation if I have not ejaculated in some time .

My normal advice re edging is to achieve the goal you set yourself re edging at that point you can ejaculate or not as you feel best meets your needs .

I still ejaculate at least once a week. In the past I’d pretty much give in and ejaculate every single time; to porn too. I’ve been doing my best to be disciplined and only let loose maybe 1 in every 3 sessions at most, and not to porn, just fine ladies in lingerie haha

**TimeALWAYStells** · 04-27-2020

4/27/20

Hey all. Have been continuing my routine, but unfortunately haven't really made progress TBH. Just wanted to talk about it here, and vent. It's sad that I've been at this for so so long, seeing people come and go and seem to cure this terrible condition. Yet here I am still stuck at ground zero.

Stretching has been ongoing. Feels like I've pretty much plateau'd there. It's more for maintenance at this point. I do feel like it's helped me open up my PF a bit though.

Hindi squats I've been able to do a little better, but still get uncomfortable with my hips. I've been able to hold them for 10 minutes here and there, which is encouraging. Definitely way more comfortable in them now than I used to be, but can't really keep my legs too wide I noticed.

RK's: I've been trying to do them regularly. I do feel some movement going on down there and increased expansion in my PF when attempting to do front RKs. I noticed lately though that when doing them harder that my glutes tighten and I always get the sensation that I'm going to fart. Not sure if that's relevant, but given that I'm trying to do front RKs I'm not sure if that's supposed to happen. Also I noticed that when I'm erect I can not really get my erection to go down from a front RK, so I must be doing it incorrectly.

Edging/sex: Still get to the PONR so quick with just my hand and lotion. Sex, forget about it. In and out in a couple of thrusts. I'll keep myself in PPT with my hips tucked in, deep breathing, trying to keep a light RK, etc., but to no avail. My PF doesn't feel as tight when I'm really hard like it used to, but even if I get my erection down by waiting / or poking hard at my PF, I'm still able to crawl back up to the PONR too quickly. I'm unable to really enjoy more than a couple strokes without feeling the sensation of PONR coming on.

I really don't know what to do. I've had depression and anxiety for years now, but lately I've realized that this just issue has just exacerbated it so much more. I have no idea who to talk to so here I am. Maybe my case really just is that bad. I'm super inflexible so maybe my imbalances or whatever are just too much to overcome. I've tried every supplement out there, I've even tried delay creams which barely work.

Maybe it's time to try a pelvic floor specialist? I really don't know.

Till next time.

**dbcoop34** · 04-27-2020

Right when I just had my first relatively decent sex session, was when my body has been the most flexible it has ever been. I truly never realized how tight my hips, legs, addcutors, etc were. I do not know if there is a super direct correlation or what but I will say that I believe that stretching everyday helped my body relax and let my stay relaxed confidently when I last had sex. I have been active my whole life but never put an emphasis on stretching and now I stretch everyday. I think that if there is anywhere you know is really inflexible, target that area. For me it was my hips and hamstrings, SO TIGHT. Now they are still a tad tight but no where near where they were a month ago. I have made big strides because I can now touch the floor with my fingers while keeping my legs straight which I have never been able to do.

**TimeALWAYStells** · 04-27-2020

Originally Posted by dbcoop34

Right when I just had my first relatively decent sex session, was when my body has been the most flexible it has ever been. I truly never realized how tight my hips, legs, addcutors, etc were. I do not know if there is a super direct correlation or what but I will say that I believe that stretching everyday helped my body relax and let my stay relaxed confidently when I last had sex. I have been active my whole life but never put an emphasis on stretching and now I stretch everyday. I think that if there is anywhere you know is really inflexible, target that area. For me it was my hips and hamstrings, SO TIGHT. Now they are still a tad tight but no where near where they were a month ago. I have made big strides because I can now touch the floor with my fingers while keeping my legs straight which I have never been able to do.

That's reassuring to hear man. Happy to hear about your progress. Do you mind sharing which stretches you did to alleviate your tightness in the hammies and hips? Because that's definitely where I'm most tight myself.

**Anthony_gerio** · 04-28-2020

I'll keep myself in PPT with my hips tucked in

Why do you do this? any particular reason?

Stretching has been ongoing

What is your stretch routine?

A general good practice is scanning your body. Search for the name of the muscles and tendons in your body, from your soles to your neck (soles, knees, legs, hips and back). Test to see if all of them are relatively normal, for each muscle there are loads of vids to test if they are normal or not, you'd be surprised to see what problems can be discovered. Even for athlets it happens (I have played in national team level, yet I had few structrul problems which was affecting my hips and back).

RK's: I've been trying to do them regularly

I am confident as important as doing them regularly, keeping them through out the day is.
And it seems from your post that you have not achieved the initial opening of PF (What I call when you actually start to feel the baloon opening feeling in your front PF while doing/keeping an RK) as well.

**dbcoop34** · 04-28-2020

Originally Posted by TimeALWAYStells

That's reassuring to hear man. Happy to hear about your progress. Do you mind sharing which stretches you did to alleviate your tightness in the hammies and hips? Because that's definitely where I'm most tight myself.

For the hips, it was hindi squats but moving as I did them. Sort of like swaying my body to stretch the hips. And for the hamstrings it was lajin and laying on the floor with back down and then pulling up my one leg vertically while keeping the other down.

**HoldTight** · 05-05-2020

Hey bud, I feel you pain. I'm 38 and still suffer from it UNLESS I do one very specific exercises. I've been doing this for awhile so when I'm having sex I proceed normally but when I start to feel the urge to cum I push in deeper in her and begin rocking against her rather than thrusting. Less sensation on my penis and I can buy myself a few minutes and lose some of my anxiety. I've found that getting over the initial hump can really set me free.

I had the same problem as you and it unfortunately affected some of my early relationships. I found a supportive (now former) girlfriend who let me do me and enjoyed me for me. I've learned how to talk about it and not hide it and know that sometimes I'll fail but at least I have a good tool for next time. My supportive former girlfriend, no wife couldn't be happier.

**TimeALWAYStells** · 05-31-2020

5/30/2020

It finally happened: I had a breakthrough.

I had a sex session where I felt pretty much in control. I couldn’t believe it.

Leading up to this session, it’d been a couple weeks since I had sex. However, I did feel like I was sort of making new discoveries as of late. Despite all of my frustrations, I continued working. I felt that overall I was moving in the right direction. I felt like changes in my PF were progressing.

During edging, I tried to pay close attention to where my clenches and tightness was coming from. I had been focusing mostly on my front kegels, but after really trying to be in more tune with my body I realized that the IKs were coming from right around my butt hole, so I guess more of that back of my PF. That area basically would pucker up and suck in (IKs?) as I would approach the PONR.

After I realized that, I tried to just pretty force my RKs to the back. I still send them to the front too, but just trying to spread the love. I also feel some tightness from deep inside my abdomen, towards the bottom and back of it. Also felt a lot of tightness from my glutes; primarily the bottom and outer parts of it. Really pushing hard RKs in that general direction I feel has made a big difference in loosening up the area. I’ve also been placing more emphasis on a lot of my other exercises to that region: Hindi squats, tennis balls, glute bridges, etc. My deep breathing has definitely improved and I really try to fill up my whole abdominal area up with air. I notice pushing my belly outwards when inhaling, then pulling it up and inwards helps me to feel more air coming in helps me feel relief/relaxation directly on my PF. I've also noticed that the texture of my PF when pressing on it feels a lot different now. It seems less tight and like more tender. If I had to make an analogy, I'd say now it feels like a chicken breast that went from frozen and hard, to defrosted, soft, pounded, and tender lol.

I wanna reiterate that I think it’s super important to loosen up the glutes. Dropping down low as you can in Hindi squats while doing your best to spread your legs out more and more while pushing your ass outwards really helps to stretch the area out. All of this really has helped my pelvic floor to feel like it’s stretching/elongating. If I had to describe it within, I’d say that it’s a diamond shape with 2 points at the outer ass, and the other at the genitals. All the stretching as of late has really began to make me feel so much better with a sense of relief, like damn... I love stretching! Must mean I'm likely finally releasing tension that's been building up there. Also worth noting that all my APT exercises have paid off as well, as I can now sit in hindi squats pretty comfortably without my hip flexors hurting. Makes a huge difference in really optimizing the stretch you get from hindi squatting as you get to stay in it longer.

During my sex session, I noticed it was way harder to get an erection. Although it’s not exactly ideal, part of me felt it was more natural and how things should be. To me it indicated my PF wasn’t super tight anymore. Normally I get a hard as a rock, instantly. I did have a beer and smoked some weed, but I’ve been tried having sex on multiple substances for years without success. Other than that, nothing else changed from my baseline. After I was able to get erect, I stayed there and pretty much got to 10/10 EQ level. I was close to PONR here and there in the beginning, but it was different from my usual. I just kept focusing on pushing RKs which helped the feeing subside and let me resume, which normally never happens. At some point we got to doggy and I was just going at it when I decided I wanted to cum. I kegel’d and finished. I had sex for at least 10 mins with pretty solid control. I still longed for that feeling of pleasure from ejaculation, which I've read some members don't even crave anymore because the actual sex feels so good.

I’m not completely out of the woods, but I’ve definitely seen the light. This is after years and years and YEARS of failures and disappointments. Thanks so much to everyone on this site. I'm so ecstatic and grateful to make it even this far. I only had one “successful” session so far, so I definitely to develop some consistency and continue on this path to see where it takes me.

Everybody is different. It’s important to listen to your body. The PF is supposed to very long, so make sure you target all of it when you train.

To those of you in despair, don’t give up hope; as I did many times. There is no one size fits all solution. Find what works for you. Good luck everyone!