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What is the cause of PE?

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  • What is the cause of PE?

    I wanted to pose a few questions .. to get some opinions as I am genuinly interested.

    I'm sure there are several people who have an unbalanced pelvic floor that can last for as long as they want. I'm sure there are people who watch porn everyday and masturbate every day but when it comes to sex can last how long they want. You get my point.

    Now what determines someones PE? Why do some people have it and some people don't. Some peoples cure for PE isn't the same for someone else ... I understand everyone is different but it just gets all a bit confusing.

    The main question I pose is, why do some people have PE for as long as they can remember and others never get the problem at all. Surely there is one major factor that causes PE - or am I wrong?

  • #2
    No one knows. Thats why we are still premature ejaculators. Maybe that is the way it should be. When we were cavemen sex was intended to procreate not for pleasure. The faster that a man could ejaculate the more he can procreate. If we were cavemen maybe we would have been awesome but unfortunately in our modern society our problem sucks pretty bad.

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    • #3
      I wonder this as well. For people with lifelong PreE, my money is on neurological or neurochemical roots. I don’t buy the argument that people “train” themselves into PreE by discovering porn at a young age and masturbating quickly, because there are plenty of kids who do this and don’t end up with issues, or even end up with the opposite problem (ED). Personally, thinking back, I’m pretty sure I had PreE issues before I even discovered porn.

      Similarly, as you mentioned, I highly doubt the root cause is generally the pelvic floor. It’s not like all the guys who don’t have PreE also happened to do pelvic floor training in their youth.

      It really frustrates me that these “root causes” are thrown around so casually as if they are fact. In order to truly determine whether e.g. excessive rushed masturbation causes PreE, you would need to look at a large number of people in all four groups: rushed/preE, not rushed/preE, rushed/no preE, not rushed/no preE. And even then it would be correlation, not causation.

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      • #4
        Originally posted by arandomperson View Post
        I wonder this as well. For people with lifelong PreE, my money is on neurological or neurochemical roots. I don’t buy the argument that people “train” themselves into PreE by discovering porn at a young age and masturbating quickly, because there are plenty of kids who do this and don’t end up with issues, or even end up with the opposite problem (ED). Personally, thinking back, I’m pretty sure I had PreE issues before I even discovered porn.

        Similarly, as you mentioned, I highly doubt the root cause is generally the pelvic floor. It’s not like all the guys who don’t have PreE also happened to do pelvic floor training in their youth.

        It really frustrates me that these “root causes” are thrown around so casually as if they are fact. In order to truly determine whether e.g. excessive rushed masturbation causes PreE, you would need to look at a large number of people in all four groups: rushed/preE, not rushed/preE, rushed/no preE, not rushed/no preE. And even then it would be correlation, not causation.
        I agree with this. I believe the issue is primarily rooted in neurochemistry for most. Everything about my natural default state/personality seems to fit the profile of someone who would ejaculate quickly. Anxious, sensitive to external stimuli, high arousal, high libido (sometimes I don't even have a refractory period), ultra goal oriented/ambitious, sensitive dick etc etc. It's no surprise that chemical interventions that slow down my nervous system, such as alcohol or opiates, basically cure me.

        Hopefully with training though this natural wiring can be overcome, though I do believe that the "ultimate" solution probably involves both training and chemical intervention of some sort, whether it be "drugs" or just natural supplements.

        I have seen results with training though so I know it does work to a certain degree.

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        • #5
          Yep, same here. It somewhat frustrates me how much “quick fix” shaming there is around here. If there was a pill I could take every day that cured PreE with minimal/tolerable side effects, you better fucking believe that I’d happily take it for the rest of my life in a heartbeat.

          Of course, there is no such pill, so like many others, I train almost every goddamn day. And it has helped to some extent. Maybe one day I’ll be satisfied with my sex life. But without some form of chemical assistance (or other “quick fix”), I highly doubt that I will ever be able to have hard, passionate, carefree long-lasting sex, like most people naturally can. Meanwhile Jonny Fucksallnight can do all that naturally with zero effort, AND enjoy it.

          And I get it, life isn’t fair. I’m not debating that. But sometimes it feels like there is almost a cult-like attitude of denial around here. Some people have depression due to chemical imbalances, and nothing except for medication helps. Some people have ADD due to chemical imbalances in their brain, and nothing except for medication helps. It seems likely that PreE is similar. So in addition to all the training I do, you better believe that I’ll try out all the chemical “quick fixes” and stick with the ones that help the most.

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          • #6
            I have been here for a long time i can tell you fixating on neuro this chemical that is seting yourself up for failure .

            The success rate of people that talk like this is low.

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            • #7
              Originally posted by arandomperson View Post
              Yep, same here. It somewhat frustrates me how much “quick fix” shaming there is around here. If there was a pill I could take every day that cured PreE with minimal/tolerable side effects, you better fucking believe that I’d happily take it for the rest of my life in a heartbeat.

              Of course, there is no such pill, so like many others, I train almost every goddamn day. And it has helped to some extent. Maybe one day I’ll be satisfied with my sex life. But without some form of chemical assistance (or other “quick fix”), I highly doubt that I will ever be able to have hard, passionate, carefree long-lasting sex, like most people naturally can. Meanwhile Jonny Fucksallnight can do all that naturally with zero effort, AND enjoy it.

              And I get it, life isn’t fair. I’m not debating that. But sometimes it feels like there is almost a cult-like attitude of denial around here. Some people have depression due to chemical imbalances, and nothing except for medication helps. Some people have ADD due to chemical imbalances in their brain, and nothing except for medication helps. It seems likely that PreE is similar. So in addition to all the training I do, you better believe that I’ll try out all the chemical “quick fixes” and stick with the ones that help the most.
              Yep, I personally have absolutely zero issue with "chemical fixes" - and there are some that do work - but the side effect profile just isn't worth it for the ones I've tried + having to constantly time the dosage is annoying. And yes, if a once or twice daily (or fuck it, 6 times daily) pill existed that cured Pre-E I wouldn't even remotely hesitate to use it.

              I would say though that I don't think it's true that "most people" simply have hard/passionate/care-free sex without any worry. Something like 1/3 of the entire population have Pre-E and cum within a minute or two (as a side note I don't even think premature ejaculation qualifies as an actual medical condition - there's no "dysfunction" involved with ejaculating quickly and probably provided an evolutionary survival advantage), and that doesn't mean the other 2/3's just go forever and never have to worry about controlling themselves either. I think one issue us guys with Pre-E have is in thinking we're some unique snowflake and that everyone else out there is just having amazing sex all the time. Keep in mind that there are TONS of guys out there just like you with the exact same issue.

              But yeah, it's annoying as fuck nonetheless. I try to keep things in perspective though. I have so many things to be grateful for and at least I CAN have sex. I'm not handicapped or sick or locked in prison or someone who can't attract women. And it's not like sex is a total bust either (no pun intended) since there are ways of working around it with foreplay, round 2's, chemical fixes here and there, jacking off before etc. I usually can work around it enough to where most women would consider me good in bed, but the main issue is that I can never just relax and enjoy it since I'm always stressing out and treating it like a huge performance.

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              • #8
                Originally posted by Pegasus View Post
                I have been here for a long time i can tell you fixating on neuro this chemical that is seting yourself up for failure .

                The success rate of people that talk like this is low.
                I'd agree with this also. I think the best approach is to focus on a solid training routine first and foremost, and then optionally experiment with certain supplements on the side to see if you can find anything that gives you some extra help. But fixating on something that you can't change (at least currently) is pointless.

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                • #9
                  Ok I am gonna give my 2 cents on the subject as I am one on the people that I can control my ejaculaton as much as I want.
                  My record is 3 hours straight sex without ejaculating . I ejaculated in the end once.
                  I am gonna give some infos according to my situation.

                  I am sure its all about genetics and practice.

                  A lot of years ago when I was a teenager I had this chat with my father and he told me he could control his ejaculation too as much as he wanted.
                  The other thing is practice.
                  When I was masturbating , I didn t want to finish fast , because I wanted to enjoy it.I never was the person to ejaculate 2-3 times in a row... I never liked that. I wanted to stroke my penis for a lot of hour and ejaculate just one time in the end.
                  So when it was time to ejaculate , I was stopping for some secs and then continue again to stroke my penis... so I learned how to block the ejaculation...
                  I noticed that after blocking my cumming for 1-2 times in a masturbation session , then I was entering to a state that I could control my ejaculation for as long as I want.

                  The same thing happens when I am having sex.
                  If I come to a situation that the ejaculation is gonna happen . I am just staying inside the woman without moving for 3-4 secs and I blocking it. Then after doing this 1-2 times , I am entering to the state that I no longer need to ejaculate , so I can hold as much I want.

                  That s all I had to say.

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Tooners88 View Post
                    Yep, I personally have absolutely zero issue with "chemical fixes" - and there are some that do work - but the side effect profile just isn't worth it for the ones I've tried + having to constantly time the dosage is annoying. And yes, if a once or twice daily (or fuck it, 6 times daily) pill existed that cured Pre-E I wouldn't even remotely hesitate to use it.

                    I would say though that I don't think it's true that "most people" simply have hard/passionate/care-free sex without any worry. Something like 1/3 of the entire population have Pre-E and cum within a minute or two (as a side note I don't even think premature ejaculation qualifies as an actual medical condition - there's no "dysfunction" involved with ejaculating quickly and probably provided an evolutionary survival advantage), and that doesn't mean the other 2/3's just go forever and never have to worry about controlling themselves either. I think one issue us guys with Pre-E have is in thinking we're some unique snowflake and that everyone else out there is just having amazing sex all the time. Keep in mind that there are TONS of guys out there just like you with the exact same issue.
                    This paragraph contains much truth about everything you should know when you start training. Premature Ejaculation is one aspect of sexuality. I had great sex sessions, preE doesn't block you out of getting it at all, it is just way harder than for the average Joe. But i tell you that, 80% of casual hookups not on tinder are happening in drunken mode and then i can fuck like a stud too, so they are not that much ahead of me.

                    Then there is the really ugly people (not ment negative) that have a life on really hard mode. For them it is way harder to even get the confidence to talk to women at all. Then there is the really obese people, they most likely get ED, decreased libido, decreased attraction, etc.. Then there are people with chronic pain..., asexual people, ...the list continues (they even can have PreE on top of that).

                    If a girl outside of my friend-network asked me to fuck her i wouldn't be hesitating a split second if i thought she is attractive. I am planning to take my problem like a man and tell her that this happens now and then but i can go for a second round and massage her in between or finger her or etc..
                    I have a dick over 6,3 inch and a good girth which is totally enough for every girl or at least 95%
                    for me Sex itself is not the problem.. handling it in a one-nighter

                    FOR ME relationships are. Serious relationships where you love your partner. Passionate satisfying sex is a way to emotional bind someone to you. And if you can't then you have to make a constant effort to create attraction otherwise. And that is why i want to fight my premature ejaculation. That is why i want to become the ultimate version of myself. Because then the world falls to my hands, i am finally free to be everything i wanted, to just walk up to the girl at the bar sober and tell her let's go home to me right now with a glance in my eyes that tell her it will be a night with someone she will long remember, to give a future love sexual satisfaction.

                    God gifted me with a mostly healthy body, above average intelligence and a different approach on many things. I am gonna use it to try to help everybody with this problem help himself.
                    ZeNigmar
                    Senior Member
                    Last edited by ZeNigmar; 07-18-2018, 04:24 AM.
                    “Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Wishing is not enough; we must do.”
                    – Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

                    My Journey on Premature Ejaculation

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                    • #11
                      My personal opinion on this:

                      It cannot be just some muscle stuff or relaxation issue or whatever. But I think getting a grip on all of those things can and is helping with the problem, wherever it roots may be found.

                      I am also in the line with people who think there have to be physical or chemical differences which cause the problem at that one starting point. After that everything else developes and some things are chose by ourselfs that make it even worse.
                      Bad masturbation habits + disposition (neuro/chem/physical) for PreE = big problem. Bad posture + disposition (neuro/chem/physical) for PreE = big problem. Tense pelvic floor + disposition (neuro/chem/physical) for PreE = big problem. Anxiety, fear of failing during sex + disposition (neuro/chem/physical) for PreE = big problem.
                      Now you go and fix all of this: you fix your bad masturbation habits, you fix your pelvic floor tension, you fix your fears and shit! All what is left is your disposition and now you can fight it. It his hard and it will never be "lets go and fuck and I do not have to think and work on anything and I will just tear you apart". But it will get okay'ish or even great due to hard work.

                      I am also suffering form this since ever. I am also realy good in control when I am drunk. I am quite okay'ish when I trust the person I have sex with with my life. I am terribly fucked when I meet someone new, it is just too exciting and new. Her body is new, her touch is new, her kisses are. The feeling of entering her is new, she is smelling different. This puts so much stress on me that I am completely unable to control anything. This aint normal! There has to be a root cause for this which is influencing how much your arousal gets affected by those things and this is probably neuro/chemical. I mean there are guys who bust their load when they kiss a woman! For gods sake, that cannot be caused by their freaking tensed pelvic floor muscles! It is not that bad for me, but I feel the arousal so early on, it affects me and my body so bad even without sticking my dick in her that my whole body is in an nearly uncontrolable state before that happens.

                      My money is on a combination of genetical disadvantage + wrong behaviour (rushing ejac etc.) which leverages all of that. Plus the anxiety/ fear thing from knowing that we have a "problem" is a big pile of shit on top of it. Our brain is a fucking maniac when it comes to influencing our life, body and everything.

                      I would not have any problems with getting laid if I wanted to. But I do not want to since I do not want to waste my time, her time and be embarrassed afterwards. Im doing my MSc, most probably PHD afterwards, im sportive, outgoing in general, good friends, many people I just know and casualy hang out with, people like me, they think high of my inteligence and come to me for advise (and smart is the new sexy) and still there is this one thing I cannot fix. Till now. I wont stop ever perhaps I should switch from studying finance to biology or chemistry and research PreE, who knows.

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                      • #12
                        Sounds to me like you guys want to avoid work and find something to blame . You know something that sounds scientific and vagely plausible .

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Pegasus View Post
                          Sounds to me like you guys want to avoid work and find something to blame . You know something that sounds scientific and vagely plausible .
                          Sounds to me like you are ignoring every other thought on this which is in conflict to your assumption and theory.

                          Nobody in here said that hard work is not needed or not helping, there are just thoughts to evaluate that point into other directions. I am working on my problem the way you propose. I am doing stretches, pelvic floor balance, edging and everything else. I am still confident that there is more to the problem than that. If it can be ever found? I do not know, neuro/chemistry is so wide and it could be something different for everybody that there will never be a "one suits all solution". Would still be a shame if we would not pay any attention to that possibilities.

                          As somebody else stated, I am 100% sure that there are people out there who clench their PC muscle to reach fast orgasm in their youth while masturbating and never suffer from PreE. Same for excessive porn consumption etc. There has to be something like a disposition to this "illness", I hope! Just for future generations if at someday something is found out.

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Pegasus View Post
                            Sounds to me like you guys want to avoid work and find something to blame . You know something that sounds scientific and vagely plausible .

                            What I want is something that works and allows me to enjoy sex. Insanity = doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results, and the exercises recommended here basically are not helping most people here. Just look at your own thread: https://www.pegym.com/forums/prematu...s-stories.html
                            It has been posted since 9/4/17 and still there is not even a single success story. I would love to really enjoy sex, not thinking "I'm going to do a black belt kegel followed by a sumo reverse kegel while thinking about Dracula to see if I can last longer. Meanwhile I will be breathing yoga style and checking my arousal level. If it reaches 7.93 I will stop and hope that she doesn't move either." That sucks and don't work. Maybe you don't understand us because as far as I know you had the opposite "problem". You don't know what is to have sex just to finish when your girl is starting to get turned on and see her disappointed face and hear "It's ok. I like it that way." when you know it is not true.

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                            • #15
                              I've had anxiety sinse I was 5 years old. I remember going to kindergarden and not sitting with the other students until near the end of the school year because of my anxiety. I've never taken a ssri drug but I just got some cbd oil to try for my anxiety. I've read some testimonies from people that use to take ssri drugs and were able to come off them slowly with the help of cbd oil and to eventually replace the ssri with the cbd oil and have the same results for their anxiety less the awful side effects of ssri drugs. That being said I like yoga or meditation as possible option for anxiety as well. I have social anxiety and also sexual performance anxiety. My hope is to do Hindi squats at first and then move to rks. I like others have always kegaled to keep my erection hard and from doing that possibly partially caused my ED and Pre E. Just my opinion i think these issues can be physical as well as a brain thing. From my understanding anxiety always starts in the brain and then moves through out the body or effects certain areas of the body.

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