Progress thread

[medusa]

Last two sessions, few days ago, (2/11/18 and 3/11/18) sorry for lack of detail. First time used emla cream and definitely experienced more control, usually cant stimulate myself with flesh light at any kind of “normal” pace, always really really slow, with cream could go faster than ever before. It still felt very pleasurable, this might be because im usually so overstimulated so desensitizing feels more normal? No idea if it would work in sex, I managed about 25 mins of edging, wouldn’t be surprised if it was considerably less during sex.

Second session(nextday): beginning was very difficult to control, very strong ik, and what ive noticed is that whenever I try and counter and ik with a rk I end up feeling more tense and out of control and potentially end up kegalling. What does help me and reduce ik’s considerably is just relaxing, focusing on the pleasure I’m feeling, thinking positively and deep breathing. I still have to stroke really slowly, but when focusing on relaxing I felt like I reached a plateau! In the first time in my life! It lasted maybe 1min 30secs to 2 mins, I didn’t time. I have a rk routine out of edging I stick to so maybe this is helping.

Had a big eureka moment that Im terrified of getting aroused because I just think I’m gonna blow, this conflict fucks me up gets my mind in such a twist that my body obviously reacts and tenses up. If Ive been afraid for so long that my body is basically trained to react that way whenever I get aroused. If I learn to EMBRACE arousal and enjoy it then overtime my body won’t automatically freak out whenever I get aroused. We will see.

[medusa]

27/10/2018:
One of the better sessions! Not many strong iks, still not sure if the little tension in my dick is a minor kegal or not. Faster strokes than usual but still very slow, 3-5 seconds. Starting to try and bring my arousal control in there, but what I’ve noticed is the words and phrases I think of while edging really has an effect so the word “control” sounds to aggressive and tense so whenever I tell myself to “control my arousal” I end up losing control and getting more tense if that makes sense. I feel more in control when I say something like “enjoy this” or “relax.” I didn’t stretch today and it still went well which was surprising. No ejaculation. Still feeling really great pleasure, stuff I haven’t really felt or delved into before.

[medusa]

1/10/18
Did penis stretches before and needed to shit. Went well, 15mins thrusting slow. Pleasure not as good as before, not as aroused, felt a bit depressed. No ejaculations. Lacking detail because this is me writing this a few days after

[medusa]

2/10/18
Did yoga session today with a teacher. Edging later felt better, less iks and more pleasurable than yesterday. 18mins. Thrusting and standing still.

[medusa]

3/10/18: Good pleasure sensations, felt like I was in plateau for a few minutes, 18 mins standing thrusting. Got excited at the end and discharged some semon but was still hard not ponr. Stopped after that.
Edged later that night but couldn’t control arousal and ejaculated, in 2 mins.

[medusa]

8/11/2018
Last few sessions has seen big progress for me! (7/11/2018, 6/11/2018) Started thrusting much faster than I have been able to before and also with my fleshlight on a tighter setting than usual. Edged every day this week and each has been 15 20 mins of thrusting and control. Thrusting on my knees still tough, cant manage more than a few minutes like this and thrusting much slower. Even sitting down leaned back and very relaxed with my hand moving the fleshlight can spark strong iks. Still no experience whether this will work with actual sex. What seems to have helped me is my mind embracing arousal and not feeling afraid of it. This week has been a mix of ejac and not ejac, cant remember exact of each but think there has been more ejaculation.
Convinced my change in mindset has helped! Less focused and agitated on every ik but more playful and enjoying myself and welcoming of arousal.

[medusa]

10/11/2018
Yesterday and today (9/10/18) not as good. Tried to attempt thrusting at same speed as before but unable to. Still faster than before. On the 9/10/18 I made 18 mins before ejaculation, today I only made 8 mins standing thrusting and kneeling, but this was because I got carried away again, could have kept going if I slowed down. From now going to try to stop ejaculating so much. My brain is still conditioned to believe it to be the best part about sex, want to break this conditioning. Need to do yoga again every day as well, have lost this habit over the past week.

Just edged now and went better, 16 mins of standing thrusting at a pace just below average, felt plateau most of the way through this. 4 mins of kneeling, this was harder and more iks. Wasn't thrusting here just moving fleshlight with my hand. Had enough control when standing that when I started to feel myself lose control I could slow my pace and regain control and enter plateau again rather than just completely stopping. ejaculated again, different than earlier today though more, slow and sensual how I'd been edging before.

[medusa]

This feels hard to explain but something else I noticed is that when edging in plateau my penis still might contract at times but I still feel in control, by contract I mean kegal but I'm not sure if its still classified as a ik. There never very strong but when I thought of plateau I didn't imagine I would still feel these. I only really noticed them today, before I've felt so good and in control that i just didnt notice them. Another thing is my breathing during plateau can also be quite shallow but I still feel in control, and if I notice shallow breathing and attempt to have a full breath from my stomach it tenses me up even more. It basically feels like if I ever try to interfere or control what body is doing its rejected and my pf tenses up. whats brought me the most succsess in my routine is just relaxing, enjoying the pleasure and playing around. If I ever try and get technical then I have a ik spike. anyone have any thoughts?

[WillGetBetter]

Hi medusa-

Sounds like you’re making progress and learning about your mind and body. Congrats.

I had a similar experience early on where when I tried to do anything- I would IK. I felt like I had to be perfectly still.

But, I’m not sure if that’s going to lead you in the right direction to fix this. I agree that breathing and relaxing is a part of the puzzle, but it seems like getting to a point where you can RK without making an IK happen would be useful.

My IKs went away over time. I think it was mostly due to stretching my pelvic floor. I think the tightness leads to the spasms. So, stretching the pelvic floor helps to reduce IKs and gives the ability to do fuller RKs to help reduce arousal.

Do you think you should do some other pelvic floor and core muscle stretches in addition to the Hindi squats? Happy baby pose, lunges, butterfly, pigeon, etc. What’s you RK/K ratio and routine?

[medusa]

Thanks for the reply! Yeah I completely agree, I've read through multiple threads, MarcusHa's one especially, promoting the use of yoga to stretch the pelvic floor, and early on in my routine (I didn't mention it in detail) I was doing it every day. The poses I was doing were happy baby like you mentioned and baddha konasana. But its something I haven't been doing enough of in recent weeks, I will also expand the poses to do, the ones you suggest sound great!
[COLOR=var(--ytd-video-primary-info-renderer-title-color, var(--yt-primary-text-color))]I am still confused by reverse kegals though, as I mentioned in the op I used to push rks so hard that may abs tensed up like crazy and I would usually end ik at the end of the rk. Anyway now I've tried to do the opposite and see it more likeelaxing the muscle than pushing out a fart or pissing. The rks I do now are heavily connected to my breath, and it basically feels like breathing through my bc or pc muscle. the in breath opening the muscle and out breath just relaxing further. I feel most connected to it while standing. Is what i've described sound like rks to you? or is there something more I could be doing. Rk reps are also something I've fallen out of habit of doing with my routine.

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