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What could be the reason? Anyone?

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  • What could be the reason? Anyone?

    I have come to notice that whenever I use lotion on my palm to masturbate, I always go on for 1hour+ without spilling but whenever I don't take my shorts off & wank holding my penis which is covered by my shorts, I spill very quick... Less than 2mins. I suffer from pe when I'm with girl.....I spill in a minute. What can anyone say about this to assist me?

    PS: before I knew I got pe, I always wank with my shorts on & stroke with it wrapped around my dick...

  • #2
    How thick/thin is the lotion you're using and do you use a lot? Have you tried using a lube like silicon-based? Maybe because of the friction by using your shorts, you're tensing your pelvic floor and now it's too tight.

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    • #3
      I've used several lotion of varying thinness. I feel it isn't about the lotion. If my shorts caused tension in pelvis... Shouldn't I also cum quickly whether using a thin/thick lotion? I keep wondering. I avn't tried unprotected sex due to fear of STD as this would enable me know if my pe only occurs with a condom(which makes my brain feel my shorts is on). I know condom should reduce sensitivity but I've seen somewhere on the internet of some people who doesn't last 2mins with condom but can go over 10mins without it.... So I'm just hanging here

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      • #4
        Good point about the lotion. Maybe try some silicone lube and see what happens with that, if you haven't already? Have you tried any of the Pre-E steps on this forum yet? If not, it would be a good place to start.

        As far as the condom part goes - When you're really aroused, you can produce a good amount of precum... add lubrication if it's a pre-lubed condom... add in the extra bit of latex at the end rubbing on your glans (and possibly frenulum) due to all the extra lubrication inside. The result is stimulation on the inside as well as from outside of the condom. Do a google search for "condom size chart" and find the right sized condom for you, maybe a little smaller in girth/circumference. This should keep the extra latex from sliding up and adding to the stimulation inside the condom.

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        • #5
          I stopped using lotion a LONG time ago. Go with some sort of oil such as olive oil, coconut oil, or lavender massage oil from Walmart or TJ Maxx for a nice relaxing smell. Additionally, warming it up intensifies the feeling when using it. Regarding your pe, if you don't use condoms than consider using them before you have your pe under control. Don't bother with the ones that have numbing gel on them as they can decrease your erection quality or even cause you to go limp during sex. Look for ones that are thicker initially. They will decrease your urge to go off. When I had those issues years ago, I used the regular magnums until I got things under control. Then transitioned back and forth between regulars and thins, and now just use thins and ultra thins with no problem.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by tank0909 View Post
            Good point about the lotion. Maybe try some silicone lube and see what happens with that, if you haven't already? Have you tried any of the Pre-E steps on this forum yet? If not, it would be a good place to start.

            As far as the condom part goes - When you're really aroused, you can produce .....
            Silicone lube? I don't think I can get That here (africa) 😑. Your suggestion is trying to point out that I need to reduce the friction by adding more lubricant to the condom, right? It seems I will last Longer with it.. I'll find the right sized cd & do as you have said. Thanks for assisting...

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            • #7
              Originally posted by CptnD View Post
              I stopped using lotion a LONG time ago. Go with some sort of oil such as olive oil, coconut oil, or lavender massage oil from Walmart or...
              Olive oil seems not to be a better lubricant for me as it feels a bit hard to rub. And like I said earlier, I do use a condom whenever I have sex but I always av pe. That's the problem as highlighted in my first post on this thread. Thanks for Posting here man.. i hope to get ur reply

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              • #8
                Originally posted by jangga View Post
                Silicone lube? I don't think I can get That here (africa) . Your suggestion is trying to point out that I need to reduce the friction by adding more lubricant to the condom, right? It seems I will last Longer with it.. I'll find the right sized cd & do as you have said. Thanks for assisting...
                All good. Basically you're looking for anything that's really slick. It's just something to try by yourself to see what happens. Try with a lot, try with a little, try with a hard grip, try with a soft grip. You can try with and without a condom too, if you want. "When I do this, this does/doesn't happen. When I do that, that does/doesn't happen."

                You want less lubricant inside the condom so it stays put and rubs less. By "add lubrication", I meant adding it to the factors that may be causing the pre-e while wearing a condom. Not that clear now that I read it again.

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                • #9
                  You are getting much more friction with shorts on, this thing is different from one person to another, some people will get off to more friction and some will to less, for me the more lube I used the faster I finish because I like the slick smooth sensation rather than more friction which I find it to be a bit of a turn off.
                  The only easy day was yesterday

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by tank0909 View Post
                    All good. Basically you're looking for anything that's really slick. It's just something to ....
                    Thanks tank0909. I appreciate your effort in suggesting the trial and error method because if I don't try, I will never know. I'll put that into practice. I'll add more lubricant and see what happens... 🙌

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Mike99027 View Post
                      You are getting much more friction with shorts on, this thing is different from one person to....
                      I'm starting to think in this same line too because the last sex was terrible tight & a bit painful and before I could adjust, I spilled. If it happens to be friction causing my pe... What do I do to improve my situation? It would seem my pelvis floor isn't tight? Why don't I spill in a minute when I use my bare hands(without lube)? Why hours? Please any help....

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                      • #12
                        I would spend a few months practice in a way that matches what real sex is like. Then your body can try to settle into those sensations. Some options:

                        1. Quit porn for a while (a few months)
                        2. Create a pelvic floor stretching and K/RK routine
                        3. Buy a fleshlight and some water based lube. Edge for 20 minutes up to 5 times per week. Only ejaculate every 3 or 4 day. Do it in different positions (laying on back, standing, kneeling, missionary, etc).
                        4. Learn relaxation breathing.
                        5. Learn to rate your arousal level during edging and sex. Learn to moderate your arousal and find a plateau by RK (or sometimes kegeling), breathing, meditation techniques, slowing your thrust speed, etc.

                        I would do this for a few months. It takes a while to get your body and mind to change after you've locked into a habit.

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by jangga View Post
                          I'm starting to think in this same line too because the last sex was terrible tight & a bit painful and before I could adjust, I spilled. If it happens to be friction causing my pe... What do I do to improve my situation? It would seem my pelvis floor isn't tight? Why don't I spill in a minute when I use my bare hands(without lube)? Why hours? Please any help....
                          My wild guess here is that you're not used to stimulation to the glans, shorts will tickle your glans making you finish faster, and if sex was terrible and painful that strengthen my theory, I don't think any vagina in the world is tighter than your grip, did you feel a ticklish dull pain sensation during sex? if so then there are two possible things here 1) you're not used to glans sensation 2) your girl wasn't wet enough, you can try to change your masturbation habits using lube getting used to full hand stroke all across your shaft and above the glans with a light grip, if you start enjoying that and sex is still painful then you could use lube or make sure to add in more foreplay to prepare the girl
                          The only easy day was yesterday

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by WillGetBetter View Post
                            I would spend a few months practice in a way that matches what real sex is like. Then your body can try to settle into those sensations. Some options:

                            1. Quit porn.,..
                            I've heard about this fleshlight for sometime now. So on ur suggestion, I had to check it out on a local online store.The complete set here in Africa is a bit on the high side. I need to get the complete set? One of the components look like vagina... Won't only that be okay? If it's okay, I'll get it only because it's cheap and affordable.

                            I have also try to incorporate some rk into my daily routine.... Though not so serious.

                            Also, I've been trying to quit porn for a year now it's really hard.... Maybe because I've no gf yet. It's really hard

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Mike99027 View Post
                              My wild guess here is that you're not used to stimulation to the glans, shorts will tickle your glans making you finish faster, and if sex was terrible and painful that strengthen my theory, I don't think any vagina in the world is tighter than your grip, did you feel a ticklish ...
                              As you might have experience, pe issue can be very deceiving. Some day when I had sex and despite the lady extremely wet, I still fast too. Sometimes, I don't even feel ponr, it just spill out.... Very terrible.

                              I don't have sex regularly as I don't have a gf. So, when I got some guts I hookup up some girl to sleep over and it's rare too.

                              Also, I don't really experience pain during sex. It just occurred on my last sex and the friction caused the pain making me spill so quick (within 3 thrusts as compared to my 6 thrusts). Pe is very frustrating.... Im even scared of having a gf now because sje would be so pissed if after telling her to be my girl & she found out

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