To light a fire you need all elements of heat, oxygen and fuel

[Anthony_gerio]

Many have overcome the PreE by applying some of the techniques advised on various forums. However, there are many cases which say despite putting an effort for a long time, they have not been successful in developing stamina. Often when I look at the posts (the ones which give some information) I see missing links.

To light a fire you need to provide all the necessary elements and without one of them (triangle of heat, O2 and fuel) you cannot generate fire.

The same is for improving ejaculation time. As frustrating as it could be, during the years you have developed your body mechanism in a way that you are not able to prevent ejaculation and thus you have to address all those situations in parallel and if you fail at one, there is a chance that your efforts will not result in satisfactory output. The very main elements that need to be worked on all together are:

- PF elongation and expansion: you need to be able to release and keep your PF released during intercourse. The best way experienced by successful people is to trying RKs and keeping a very very light RK for as long as a period you can (hours). Now you have find what is a RK, maybe you have been doing it all along during these years. It is worth to mention as much as you progress into your routine, your requirement for RK hold decreases.

- Flexibility and openness of the core: you need to have an open core as they are all connected to your PF and in particular if you are in a dynamic position during sex, any tightness can trigger you PF to react badly and more PF needs space to expand and tight hip is a barrier for it. The core includes all the muscles and ligaments connected to your PF.

- Glutes (Maximus, medium and piriformis)
- hip flexors
- hip abductors
- hip adductors
- hamstring
- Rectus Abdominis
- Transverse Abdominis
- Obliques
- lower back (lumbar spine)
- Multifidus

- Power and activation of the core: a power core helps you to keep a neutral position and gives you stamina for your the movements in intercourse. Power full abs help to keep the PF down, power full glutes automatically increase the power of the PF and activated Multifidus helps glutes to do their jobs (preventing back PF to lock in) during the sex. Glute max power and activation is a must for PF development.

- Remember that PF is at the centre of your hip and imbalances between hip flexion, hip extension and hip adduction and hip abduction significantly disturb and gets it out of balance. Any weakness in these areas should be addressed by training the muscles responsible for them. Moreover, external and internal rotation of the hips should be considered and any limitations should be dealt with.

- Memory: you need to remember what you need to do during the sex. Some as soon as the first kiss (I was like this once) loose every thing and their anatomy gets back to the mixed up situation. You need to know:

- keep your PF relaxed and down at all times (keeping a light RK could help initially)
- you need to feel your Transverse abdominal layer within the sex and not letting your abs to be fully deactivated. It is your tool to play with your PF.
- you need to play with glutes as well and keep your back PF expanded.
- you need to remember to breath, not necessary belly breathing which needs a lot of concentration itself (as much as you hear, hey you need to make it your own default) and just breath relatively calm and do not keep your breath.
- you need to keep out all the bad sex memories from the past, it doesn't matter, you have changed, you have trained and you have overcome the physical aspects which was not your fault. Be in the moment.

I hope this would be of help to some and guide them that in order to see improvement as fast as possible, you do not have the luxury of overlooking any of the above aspects. And remember it may take time to make all the transformations, maybe half a year or more. It is important to be consistent in training and development.

[dbcoop34]

Always appreciate the feedback and advice Anthony.

[PhilipKDick]

@Anthony_gerio can you recommend a training routine following your post? One which addresses the particular muscular issues you detailed and includes RKs? I get so lost when I try to stretch and exercise all of the necessary muscles on my own, not knowing what I'm doing.

[Anthony_gerio]

@Anthony_gerio can you recommend a training routine following your post? One which addresses the particular muscular issues you detailed and includes RKs? I get so lost when I try to stretch and exercise all of the necessary muscles on my own, not knowing what I'm doing.

There's not a single routine that works for everyone. You have to adjust your training based on your needs, figuring out in which of the areas you have the most weakness and focusing more on it.

I can give you an advice about your daily activities. Training and etc. is really important but more important than that is your daily posture. As an example, I had tight inner abductors, weak and tight glute maximus and the same for lower back.
So while doing my daily activities, I work standing with my legs open more than my shoulder width and I always keep a light RK. This puts my hips on a constant light stretch and elongation and while my hips are open, it gives an opportunity with better space for my PF to be expanded more. I changed my sitting position from slouching on the coach to crossed leg on the ground for the last 6 months which is a constant hip opener (at first it was significantly heartful but after 3 weeks it got better and I was able to sit in the position correctly eventually after 2 months). Within these type of activities you feel the opening in your PF and hips and core.

Another thing is about the stretching routines I see normally. To open my glutes, I used to (as it is enjoying now I still do sometimes) be the stretches positions (which are abundant on youtube) for at least 20 mins twice per day. 30 secs or 1 min daily doesn't do much. Also, you have to be careful to not stretch to a painful level. Stretch up to a very slight pain and keep the position for longer period of times thus your body sees it as a position to grow to not a position to fight to.
Hindi squats and RKs the same, long period of times (I used to be hindi squat position for an hour and half at least daily while watching Netflix for example) and the RKs light to medium whether standing or in hindi squat position and constant not pushing out hard for 2 secs and repeat it.

[Anthony_gerio]

Front RK.jpg

Where you should feel are forcing out when you do a front kegel standing up.

[Jimmy_quick]

Front RK.jpg

Where you should feel are forcing out when you do a front kegel standing up.

Do you recommend maintaining a RK during sex or the PF should become relaxed with the time being when you train for sometime? Thanks.

[madyogi]

I just came across this thread for the first time. Really solid post, Anthony! The graphic is spot on, and basically all your advice totally in line with my experience.

I would only add that the balance between what you call an "open and flexible core" and what you call a "powerful and active core" can be a difficult thing to internalize. Most people end up concentrating on one or the other and miss the sweet spot in the middle. The yoga tradition in which I was trained would use a phrase like "minimum muscular effort" to point to the optimal amount of tone necessary to maintain integrity in any given position. So, core activation is critical to spinal integrity (neutral position), but too much core activation is stifling. At the same time, losing all tone in the belly is a no-no under pretty much all circumstances, but you must be able to belly breathe and to open your PF as well. It's paradoxical in this sense, and takes quite a lot of practice and sensitivity to get it right in my experience.

Anyway, overall great advice to the community!

[madyogi]

Do you recommend maintaining a RK during sex or the PF should become relaxed with the time being when you train for sometime? Thanks.

Speaking for myself, I don't actively maintain the RK during sex, it's more of an intuitive thing as I get closer to PONR. In my experience this intuition has come about over time, mostly from extended edging. When I first started edging for the purpose of stamina I would get to PONR and do a serious RK. At that point, the urgency would either subside and I could keep going, or might have needed to then do a hard kegel to avoid ejaculation. Either way, I could usually avoid going over the edge and continue edging.

I also started working on the stuff in MinuteMan's DO Guide a while back. There's enough there in terms of kegel training to keep you busy for quite some time.

[Jimmy_quick]

Speaking for myself, I don't actively maintain the RK during sex, it's more of an intuitive thing as I get closer to PONR. In my experience this intuition has come about over time, mostly from extended edging. When I first started edging for the purpose of stamina I would get to PONR and do a serious RK. At that point, the urgency would either subside and I could keep going, or might have needed to then do a hard kegel to avoid ejaculation. Either way, I could usually avoid going over the edge and continue edging.

I also started working on the stuff in MinuteMan's DO Guide a while back. There's enough there in terms of kegel training to keep you busy for quite some time.

I am at a stage whem during intercourse I am at PONR at the penetration time, very annoying. Very often I cum right away. However if I stop right after i am in, wait some seconds and continue slowly I can push light RK (if I push hard I again cum) and if being careful go for another 5-10min. Lately if my wife allows it, after the first 10 min I get in plateau like phase and can go hard and deep.
Now the point is how to get to this plateau state early and not after 10 min stopping and starting?
My routine in the last months consists of only RKs, yoga and stretching
Does it make sense to introduce normal kegels? I am afraid to start them however as in the past when I could last 2-3min of intercourse i started doing kegels and it got much worse.

[madyogi]

A few things come to mind.

First, I've never personally dealt with Pre-E, so I know there are others around these parts better qualified to help. Take what I say with that grain of salt.

Second, have you ever suggested mutual masturbation as part of foreplay with your wife? It seems to me if you both spent 5 minutes pleasuring yourselves together, this might not only be stimulating for the two of you, but it also might get you closer to the plateau place you want to be prior to PIV sex. I know I enjoy watching my wife touch herself, and she claims to like watching me stroke my dick as well.

Third, do you have privacy/opportunity to edge yourself without climax for minutes at a time? I know that private edging without climax has done wonders for my stamina.

Finally, I want to reiterate that I'm no Pre-E expert. I don't really consciously kegel or RK during intercourse at all. Slowing down my breath is conscious. Maintaining a gentle tone in my "Transverse abdominal layer within the sex and not letting your abs to be fully deactivated" as Anthony pointed out in his initial post is conscious. Otherwise, stamina for me is intuitive.

Hope that helps.