PE Problem - Please Read

[confidential Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close confidential]

Hello all, this is my first post, but I've been lurking for a while and trying to figure out how to fix my issue.

First off, let me preface this by saying that I've done a lot of reading regarding kegels, reverse kegels, the BC/BS muscle, the PC muscle, and all of that, so I may be "too close to the forest to see the trees" and am unable to figure out my problem.

As a child, for whatever reason, I never masturbated. The first time I ever orgasmed was when I was 17 and had my first girlfriend (sad I know - btw I'm 23 now). Because of this, I'm considering that perhaps I have an under-developed PC/BC muscle because of lack of use? Who knows. During this time of my life it always took a very long time for me to reach orgasm. Anyways, after the first orgasm I started masturbating regularly, but with bad habits. To avoid being caught (and because it wanted to reach orgasm quickly) I rushed the masturbation process. I also never used any type of lubrication, but never experienced any kind of pain. I also never really included the "head" of the penis when I was masturbating. In fact, I think I was so anxious to reach orgasm that I kegeled prior to being fully erect (and while erect) to increase hardness. Keep this part in mind.

The first time I had sex I probably lasted....5-6 minutes maybe? I wasn't happy with this, so I decided that masturbating a lot would make me get used to the feeling and thus increase my "lasting" time. Well, I continued to finish as quickly as I could while masturbating (as described above), and obviously this never really helped my issue.

So, I sit here today with a PE problem. I cannot decide what it is that I need to do, or exactly what the problem is. My theories are as follows:
1) by masturbating every day, and trying to maintain a nearly "constant" kegel, my BC/PC is incredibly overused.
2) since I started masturbating so late in life, I'm working with under-developed BC/PC muscles which are in need of serious training.
3) my BC/PC muscle is overly-exercised and too strong, thus creating an imbalance in my pelvic floor so I need to perform RKs.
4) the head of my penis isn't used to stimulation, and this is causing the PE
5) a possible combination of 1, 2, 3, and 4

I think it is worth noting that when I sneeze I can feel a bit of soreness in the perineum area on occasion (and sometimes even a little urine leaks), and I tend to involuntarily kegel quite often (primarily when standing up from a chair/couch, and during the beginning of masturbation). I will also say that, if I'm performing RKs correctly, I believe that they help me when I'm nearing the PONR.

If you've made it this far, thank you for reading and trying to help me. Am I just overworked? If so, how long should I take to recover? Or am I under-developed? Thanks in advance.

[Drummer19 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Drummer19]

I am no pro at this but it sounds like we have a few things in common. 1. I have a constant "kegal" for the same reason as yourself. 2. I wouldnt suspect your masturbating late in life would have much to do with it, but you never know... 3.I have been on a serious RK program and it is definitely helping as far as I can tell. 4.You have stumped me on this one, haha. I would think rubbing it too much would cause PE instead of what you propose...
Doing RKs, edging, and proper breathing techniques are all seeming to really be helping me. If you need any details or anything I will gladly share. On another note, how long do you last in the sack as of now?

[TinyMutantNinjaTurtle Member Find all posts View Profile Close TinyMutantNinjaTurtle]

sorry to be kind of blunt and unscientific,(i'm half asleep lol) But do you think maybe through masturbation you've trained yourself for rapid release? You said you always tried to get off fast.

[confidential Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close confidential]

Drummer: When I mentioned #4, I was implying that it is NOT used to stimulation. Thus, when it is stimulated it causes PE because it's not used to it. And I actually seem to be worse - a couple minutes in I'm at PONR, but RK seems to help.

TMNT: Yes, that's a theory of mine. I was asking everyone here to see if that was a possibility, which I'm assuming it is.

[Drummer19 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Drummer19]

I understand you completely confidential. For me think I may have stimulated it too much over the years thus causing extreme stimulation and PE. I have also seen some posts suggesting that the sensitivity may be the same for every man and that head sensitivity doesn't effect PE. But there is more than one type of PE out there apparently so who knows who's right?
Also I am curious if I do involuntary kegals myself from standing up like you, since I only thought it was possible when stimulating...

[twopumpchump Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close twopumpchump]

yes yes yes! the contast kegel , sitting , standing , pretty much anything my body relies on my kegel muscles , Cant even touch my cock with out kegeling. They feel over used and able to flex at anytime. Ive been trying reverse kegels and im not stopping

[spanky Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close spanky]

Read these confidential. Already seeing benefits from the idea presented here, a simple idea, but one I've never heard anywhere else, and I've had a progressively bad PE problem for years.

PE and DE the physical cure ?

Implications

[confidential Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close confidential]

Spanky, I've actually read both of those threads a few times haha. I guess my main question is this: should I rest everything for like a month, then start a kegel/RK routine, or should I start now? I don't want to start a routine now if everything is too sore/tired/worn out and needs rest first.

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

Do you get unintended, uncontroled kegels? If you do ,then you should start by trying to relax your pelvic floor and doing reverse kegels. If not your answer lies elsewhere.

[confidential Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close confidential]

Pegasus, yes I do get involuntary kegels. I've noticed when they are most prominent: 1) in the very beginning of sex upon entry (no kegels on the exit stroke), and 2) right before/during PONR (obviously).

I believe that all I need to determine is when to start a kegel/RK routine. Either I should start now, because my muscles are weak, or after a month (unless you have a better time-frame suggestion??) or so of rest so the BC/PC have recuperated to their original strength prior to starting a routine.

[spanky Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close spanky]

My guess would be to start a gentle kegel routine right now, see if you can isolate all the four main ones - I started with just normal BC kegels daily, and that gave me more wood as you'd expect. I was suprised how hard it was to hold them at first - not because I wasn't used to my BC being weak, but because the routines were working up to 60 seconds or so holds, and I'm like "no. way.". It probably took less than a month before I broke through some sort of barrier, and instead of holding for 4 seconds.. then 5... I could suddenly hold for 20, then 30 seconds. Didn't help my PE much until I discovered this place, the other three main types of kegels and the idea that RELAXING the pelvic floor was the key. With that it probably didn't take long until I could isolate the muscles much better, and I'm now just experimenting a bit, trying to get a much better feel for my response there during arousal.

If Pegasus' balance theory works for you (I expect it has resonance for everyone) I think a good way to look at it is literally about balance, like riding a bike. If you can feel, strengthen and control all the muscles in your pelvic floor, you'll be wobbly at first, but i'd expect there to come a point where you don't even have to think about it. Just like riding a bike, one day you'll be riding round the park and be like... oh, look what I did! that was easy, I don't remember suddenly "getting it".

Just my 2c, but don't take me as any sort of authority, I'm still very much a student!

Good luck