Hoochin's Journal: Starting from zero

[hoochiNn]

Hello and welcome! Finally , I decided to start my own journal which will collect my thoughts, progress and everything related to my journey in overcoming premature ejaculation.


My intention with this journal is to share my thoughts so I can get feedback / reviews, help myself to be constant and as a way of trying to keep my motivation high. Also arrived the day I overcome PE, it may serve as a guide and motivation to others with the same problem.


My story is long but I will try to summarize: I have 23 years , close to 24. Premature ejaculation has been something that has influenced me during my day to day since I have 15 years. I learned a lot about it all this time but due my tendency to depression and my lack of will, I've never been consistent in my cure I've had moments where I've come to reject any female contact but after my last relationship, I saw that what I really want is to end this once, I think I've suffered enough and this must end. I want that to change. Currently I'm single and until I get some confidence with my progress, I prefer not to have sex (at least with a stranger).

As a start, I would like to go achieving small goals as I think it's a good way to gain confidence and self esteem. I will focus on balancing my pelvic floor as I notice it weak and with a lot of IK.




My current routine:

- Minuteman's DO Pelvic Floor routine Level 0.
- 10 min. Meditation every day (not doing RK Breathing since I'm doing them so forcefull)
- 30 min. Edging 2 times per week (cumming just at one of them)
- Leg & Yoga strecthes

[hoochiNn]

There's one thing on my mind for some time:

During the day there are actions that do tighten my pelvic floor and cause involuntary kegels. No, I'm not talking about the gym, run or drive the car, I mean for example when I laugh, simple movements such as standing up from a chair, etc.
Even when I'm talking to some people, if I focus on my pelvic floor, I can feel that I am creating tension.

My question here is whether we should focus 24/7 on our pelvic floor and try to reduce these movements or over time, these movements disappear by themselves.

It may be related to my degree of stimulation, I feel a bit insecure and that arouses me/ gives me some anxiety. Should look to control this degree of arousal/excitement?

I wish I could get the opinion of some expert users who have overcome the problem or have made ​​significant progress.

Have a nice weekend!

[sameel]

Make conscious efforts to not tight your pelvic floor doing these movements. Instead, you can tighten your diaphragm. Deep breathing if done frequently, makes this learning easy. It is just a matter of habit.

[ammonite]

I think that to some degree, Pre E is a problem caused by muscle memory of the pelvic floor tightening up during certain movements. This is a very hard thing to overcome, and will require a lot of attention. When doing a movement (those such as you stated) try either to make a concious decision to stay relaxed, or perform a RK to force it to stay relaxed. However, try to avoid focusing on it all the time, because it might become and obsession. By deliberately not doing a kegel at these movements, over time the need to perform the kegel will fade and fade, until eventually, it completely disappears. Then, it will not happen during sex and will make control a lot easier.

However, a tense pelvic floor is not the only cause of these involuntary kegels, they can be brought on by many factors, as outlined in the link in my signature, and it is probably best to go for an attack on all fronts to have the best chance of getting them entirely under control.

As for your routine, I see you have changed to cumming only 1 out of every 2. This is good. But to take this further, I would reccomend you change it so that you only cum after a good session. So, if you find yourself having lots of involuntary kegels and many PONR's, stop and don't ejaculate. However, if you have a long relaxed session and your arousal is under control, you should ejaculate at the end. This teaches you the rewards of ejaculation after a good session, and improves the sense of satisfaction you get from it, while also showing you that ejaculation is not the only good thing. Your body should learn that it only gets the release from orgasm if it behaves itself.

Learn to do light RK, these are good as you can hold them for ages if done correctly, so can release tnesion during the day, and prevent involuntary kegels during edging.

How strong are your kegels? If you can hold one for maybe 20 seconds or more without reholding, I would say drop them completely for now until you notice a reduction in tension. The less kegels you do, the less tension. I'm not saying they are bad, but for someone who has tension problems, they can aggrevate the problem until relaxation is achieved.

There is often also a mental aspect to Pre E, especially in people who have had it for a long time. This is harder to understand, but usually comes in the form of anxiety/arosual control/rushing to the PONR. You should fix the physical problems first, but keep in mind this is likely also having an effect, and is much harder to fix. I would not suggest trying to deal with the mental aspect until you have atleast good physical control.