First sexual encounter since PE work...

[Fastnpass Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Fastnpass]

Hi everyone,

A little backstory, I've had PE from the get go and it has been worsened over the past two years of porn abuse and quick masturbation.

Recently I've been trying to fix this, in the past 2-3 weeks I've been edging and since last week I've given up porn, started meditative RKs 20 mins a day and minutemans kegel/RK routine.

I had sex with my gf today, and thought I would see some improvement in control, as I've seen some when edging, but I felt it was worse, I felt the need to ejaculate with the first thrust, I tried to pull out and compose myself, but after 3-4 more thrusts I was done!!

Is this something to be expected? Am I expecting too much? Should I be doing more/less? I should point out that I haven't had sex for about 3 weeks prior to this, but frequent sex isn't possible for me cz of other commitments.

I felt that I was extremely aroused even during foreplay and had IKs as a result, is there anything I can do to help with mental arousal?

Thanks, appreciate any comments!

[longerlastingnoob Senior Member Member of the Month Jan 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close longerlastingnoob]

3 weeks without would add to the cause. Also take into account edging will always be an increased time over sex. If the ik's are still happening early, try a reverse only routine. Add in stretches and deepsquats and see what difference it makes.
How are you edging, stop/ start or plateau?

[Fastnpass Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Fastnpass]

What would a reverse only routine look like? As in repetitions, holds, frequency?

And I'm not sure in the difference between the edging routines, right now I'm simply edging to near PONR, stopping, rinse and repeat for 20-30 minutes, occasional ballooning if I feel too much sensitivity. Sometimes I reach PONR in 5-10 strokes, sometimes after a minute or so, I don't ejaculate after sessions.

[longerlastingnoob Senior Member Member of the Month Jan 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close longerlastingnoob]

Start off with 25-50 short holds 2 or 3 times a day. Do a day on a day off.
Keep edging the way you are, focussing on increasing time each session.
Dont worry if your going slow or barely touching yourself, once stimulation keeps going, you'll keep improving.

[Fastnpass Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Fastnpass]

Thanks for the advice

So I've cut out kegels and focused on eliminating IKs and solely reverse kegels and a bit of stretching.

Just had sex again today and still the same pr

[Fastnpass Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Fastnpass]

Thanks for the advice

So I've cut out kegels and focused on eliminating IKs and solely reverse kegels and a bit of stretching.

Just had sex again today ( first time since last post) and still the same problem!! Over in 1-2 thrusts!!

Is there any more advice, why is this happening! It's seems to be worse than when I started working on the problem which is very de motivating!!

[burtybasset Retired Moderator Member of the Month May 2014PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close burtybasset]

Hey bro, in my opinion you need to try and control your arousal level too! Try using your breathing to calm you down as well as relax your pelvic floor. take longer deeper breaths when edging and also try edging in the position you will be having sex in! If you only ever edge when you are seated you may be able to last longer in a seated position, but when you start engaging your leg and butt muscles in missionary you won't have much control! So maybe try edging in a kneeling position with focus on trying to relax and calm yourself!

[longerlastingnoob Senior Member Member of the Month Jan 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close longerlastingnoob]

Thanks for the advice

So I've cut out kegels and focused on eliminating IKs and solely reverse kegels and a bit of stretching.

Just had sex again today ( first time since last post) and still the same problem!! Over in 1-2 thrusts!!

Is there any more advice, why is this happening! It's seems to be worse than when I started working on the problem which is very de motivating!!

If you've been exercising and edging a lot, fatigue can cause this. Adequate rest time is needed. Also transfering it to sex will not be the same especially so quick. Practice edging with your gf and this will help immensely.

[CptnD Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close CptnD]

Hi everyone,

A little backstory, I've had PE from the get go and it has been worsened over the past two years of porn abuse and quick masturbation.

Recently I've been trying to fix this, in the past 2-3 weeks I've been edging and since last week I've given up porn, started meditative RKs 20 mins a day and minutemans kegel/RK routine.

I had sex with my gf today, and thought I would see some improvement in control, as I've seen some when edging, but I felt it was worse, I felt the need to ejaculate with the first thrust, I tried to pull out and compose myself, but after 3-4 more thrusts I was done!!

Is this something to be expected? Am I expecting too much? Should I be doing more/less? I should point out that I haven't had sex for about 3 weeks prior to this, but frequent sex isn't possible for me cz of other commitments.

I felt that I was extremely aroused even during foreplay and had IKs as a result, is there anything I can do to help with mental arousal?

Thanks, appreciate any comments!

It sounds like you just need to calm yourself down. I had that problem over 3 years ago when my GF couldn't give me head long enough to get me off. Her jaw would hurt after a while so I started forcing myself to cum sooner, as soon as possible. I didn't know it would end up causing me to PE every time that I had sex or masturbated. It was incredibly hard and frustrating to get over. It took a few years of controlling my mind, heart rate, excitement levels, and stamina to overcome it. I consider myself very fortunate to have realized on my own that that was the reason I was ejaculating so soon.

[Fastnpass Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Fastnpass]

Thanks for all the input!

Yeah I do always edge lying down but when I have sex it always starts ( and ultimately ends) in missionary, so I'll try solely edging kneeling for a week or two.

Arousal is definitely a problem I think due to the time lengths I go between sex, apart from deep breathing is there anything that can help with this?

Another thing is that my gf doesn't give head on her own accord, and I don't ask as I'm worried that it would take me over the edge and then I wouldn't be able to have sex, so as a result the first time my penis has any stimulation is at penetration, which is too much stimulation for me I think, is there anything I can do about that?

[longerlastingnoob Senior Member Member of the Month Jan 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close longerlastingnoob]

Foreplay. Make it last for 15-20 mins or longer keeping the focus on her. Some light stim inbetween for you and a lot of attention on oral for her ( if she likes that). Then take it slow, just go a snails pace for the first few mins.
You might find it helps in lasting longer you might not. But either way you should do it like this or in as similar way substitutng the above for your and her preferences.

[burtybasset Retired Moderator Member of the Month May 2014PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close burtybasset]

Thanks for all the input!

Yeah I do always edge lying down but when I have sex it always starts ( and ultimately ends) in missionary, so I'll try solely edging kneeling for a week or two.

Arousal is definitely a problem I think due to the time lengths I go between sex, apart from deep breathing is there anything that can help with this?

Another thing is that my gf doesn't give head on her own accord, and I don't ask as I'm worried that it would take me over the edge and then I wouldn't be able to have sex, so as a result the first time my penis has any stimulation is at penetration, which is too much stimulation for me I think, is there anything I can do about that?

I've always preferred to stimulate the lady and ensure she goes cross eyed well before penetration that way the pressure is off you to "perform" with your penis!

I would have an honest talk with her, because I'm sure it's frustrating for her and if she thinks your not interested in her pleasure, might eventually get a little resentful. Not that I'm trying to worry you, but if you can both work on the problem together I believe would be a step in the right direction! A problem shared is a problem halved!

Also if you can communicate your how your feeling during sex, maybe it will help further with control, if she stops touching you if you feel like your going to lose it.

[Fastnpass Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Fastnpass]

Yeah we haven't talked about it so that might help, and I always get her off 1-2 times before sex so that's not a worry! Foreplay is normally 10-20 minutes of that

[CptnD Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close CptnD]

Thanks for all the input!

Yeah I do always edge lying down but when I have sex it always starts ( and ultimately ends) in missionary, so I'll try solely edging kneeling for a week or two.

Arousal is definitely a problem I think due to the time lengths I go between sex, apart from deep breathing is there anything that can help with this?

Another thing is that my gf doesn't give head on her own accord, and I don't ask as I'm worried that it would take me over the edge and then I wouldn't be able to have sex, so as a result the first time my penis has any stimulation is at penetration, which is too much stimulation for me I think, is there anything I can do about that?

Ask for head if you have to man. I'm pretty sure it will help with sensitivity. For example, the first time I got head it took me less than 5 minutes to ejaculate. Now I can get sucked for over 45 minutes before supporting the urge to cum. I think they say missionary is the best for problems with PE. However, I slightly disagree. Everyone's body is different. You just need to try different ways of combat the issue. Try doing doggy style and go at a steady pace. As you start to go faster, count your thrusts, and stop when you feel the PONR coming. Pause, then go again at the same speed, but try to do a few more thrusts than previously. Your brain should trigger a certain competitiveness to beat the amount of thrusts you did before. More thrusts at constant speed will obviously equal more time overall. Lastly, when you feel the urge to cum, think of something that turns you off somewhat but not completely. It may halfway kill your erection but at least it calmed your nerves in the process and you can just forget about it and keep going.
REMEMBER: Stay confident through the whole thing. You're not gonna make a change over night so don't rush it. Just keep thinking you WILL overcome this and keep in mind that you are "THE MAN!"
That's what helped me. Hope it helps you!

Not to high-jack your thread but on a positive note, I had sex with my GF in the shower the other day and came pretty close to going MACH 1 speed lol. Needless to say I felt a very warm sensation flow from her vagina and drip off my balls. It was the ultimate turn on of succession! Good things take time as every good man and woman will stress to you on here.

[CptnD Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close CptnD]

Oh and I forgot to add that I did start off with Trojan delayed climax condoms. The Benzocaine in them definitely helps. When it comes to a point where you almost can't stay fully erect during sex while using them, change to the thin ultra lubricated ones.