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  • Girlfriends Sexual Past...

    So my GF is 30, I'm younger, only 25. Been together for just under 2 months, been hanging out and seeing each other for about 4. She's overall one of the most well rounded and thoughtful people I've ever met. She makes great money, the smallest things make her so happy, she looks great, body is great, amazing personality, eats right, extremely nice, also very very honest, I've never been able to trust someone as much as her, she's athletic, she's very smart, very close with her family. The sex between us is amazing. There was just this automatic click and immediate and very strong sexual chemistry between us that just felt so right. Matching sex drives, she'll do anything with me in bed. I've done things to her in bed she's never done (blind fold, certain positions, etc.) She told me last week that sex with me is completely mind blowing and she had to brag to her friends about me (cause of the sex and I'm guessing my body as well. I'm a bodybuilder/ actual signed fitness model with an agency) which she said she's never done. She actually pursued me, very persistently even tho I showed hardly any interest the first few times just cause I was talking to other women at the time and she just didn't give up.

    SO, she tells me she's had 3 boyfriends, and that she hasn't been with many guys, started having sex at 17, so 13 years of sex. Cause she told me "not that many" I thought like 6-7 total partners. Then I find out she's had 10...something about it being double digits I just didn't like. BUT, a big but, 10 guys at 30 reallly isn't bad. She was in an off and on 9 year relationship 17-26, where other than her off and on boyfriend, she had sex with 4 other guys in those 9 years of being off and on. Then since 26, 5 more guys. So in the past 4 years, 5 guys, which really isn't also bad. But it stil bugs me, maybe just cause I care about her so much so it's hard to imagine. Also, she didnt tel me she was off and on in that 9 year relationship. I assumed she was with only that one dude for 9 years. So if she would have told me they were off and on, instead of guessing 6-7 partners, I really would have guessed 10-13, and she's had 10.

    What do you guys think? Slutty? Would it bother you? I know plenty of girls that are 18-21 and already at 8-10, girls in their mid 20's at 15-20 guys. so 10 at 30, not too bad really. I also know 2 guys that are both pretty good lucking who have pursued her and she turned them both down, so she's picky. And just to throw this in there, I know, double standards, I've been with 50 some woman and I've been with 13 in the last year, so I've been with more in one year than she has in 13 years

    One last thing I'll say, most girls are getting engaged and the married by like what 26-27? If you were to give those girls another 3-4 years of being single I'm sure they'd hit 10 guys.

    6 years ago the hottest girl I ever hooked up with had some solid standards and was an extremely well rounded girl just like my GF, and by the time she was 21 she had 5-6 guys, at 18 she had 3. So give her till 30 of being single and I'm sure she'd also rack up 10+ despite being one of the best women I've ever met in my life in terms of kindness, honestly, loyalty, physical attractiveness, smart, fun, personality.

  • #2
    How many girls have you had sex with? 50? And you're worried that she's a slut? Wow!
    The world's still a toy if you just stay a boy!

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    • #3
      It wouldn't bother me at all. That number is arbitrary in the end. Judging someone based on a number is pointless. From what you describe about her, honest, healthy, trustworthy, smart,close with family, she doesn't sound like a "slut" at all just because she had lots of sexual partners. That notion of labelling a girl and objectifying her as a slut and someone who's "used up" just because of her number of sexual partners is just judgemental as fuck; a product of societal programming.

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      • #4
        One thing I've had to learn and accept is that women are human and sexual too.
        It doesn't matter how many partners they've had, they're allowed to have sex and enjoy giving and receiving pleasure just as much as us men are.

        You're obsessed because you want to be the only person she's ever been with. Not going to happen, so accept her sex life and move forward.

        This is coming from someone with severe OCD (obsessive thinking).

        My girlfriends past is much more detailed than yours, she's an incredible person and loving.. It doesn't make her a bad person for enjoying one of the things life has to offer.
        09-03-2016: BPEL: 6.5 EG: 5.0
        04-16-2019: BPEL: 7.1 MEG: 5.19
        03-29-2020: BPEL: 7.36 MEG: 5.39

        No person is worth wanting to hurt yourself over, neither is the size of your penis.

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        • #5
          Hey MG, why do you consider "experience" a bad thing? Women who've had numerous sexual partners are no different than guys who have, IMO. I've been a "rabbit" since I was a teen, and it's done 2 important things for me...I'm a better sexual partner for SURE than guys with less experience ("practice makes PERFECT", right?), plus more experienced partners (both male & female) are able to enjoy sex with each other BEST; having no inhibitions & more confidence, are more inclined to try & enjoy experimenting with positions, different "spur of the moment" locations, and share more sexually stimulating "variety" than couples who are less experienced with multiple partners. That makes sex MORE FUN, which only leads to...MORE SEX!

          Sex is no different than anything else humans desire & determine they want to do well! The more times you practice, the better you perform, especially with a variety of partners! Give up the archaic notions that women who have more sexual experience than most are "sluts", it's no different than guys who do the same! Your new GF sounds like a perfect match for you sexually, and she's somewhat selective too! STOP finding fault where there is NONE! Enjoy free uninhibited sex as much as possible! Just ALWAYS wear a condom to be "safe" until you're BOTH committed to an exclusive relationship sexually. Once you get THERE, spontaneity adds a WHOLE NEW DIMENSION to SEX, believe me! Good luck to you BOTH!

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          • #6
            I know I know. Still...just bugs me. But like I said I really don't think she is. It's just the number bugs me. But I think it's just cause she's my GF. So it's hard to imagine others being there. But that's life. Every hot girl that's that fun to be around and at that age is going to have a past.

            Out of those 10, 3 boyfriends, 1 she said was kind of a boyfriend, she doesn't consider it one cause she says it didn't last long enough officially, and 6 guys she was with without being in a relationship with, but she said each of those guys she took her time with, went on 3-5 dates, and had discussed exclusitivity first. But they just didn't work out. She said due to either ex's coming back, social media, lose of interest, and it just simply not working out. She says sex for her is very very emotional, she just can't do casual sex, no one night stands, said she's never had a fuk buddy or friends with benefits. She'll only have sex wjtha guy if she can see herself dating him. Which like I said, finding 10 guys in 13 years that you'd like to date is pretty selective and picky. And YES, I do believe she's telling the truth with all of this. Like I said, she's been incredibly honest with me about so many other things that she reallyyy didn't need to tell me but she did. She's literally one of the nicest people I've ever met. If she lied to me, I think she'd eventually regret it so much she'd have to come forward. That's the way she is

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            • #7
              I hate this double standard society has, it's great
              for men to have many partners but not women.

              You want a woman great in bed, with a high sex drive but not to have slept with many men beforehand.

              Unless there in their late teens, it's going to be like looking for a needle in a turnip field! And teen wouldn't have all the other great qualities you have mention.

              I recommended recently to a member privately to watch 'Chasing Amy' regarding jealousy, maybe you should watch it too.

              Enjoy your relationship, stop thinking silly thoughts. Her past has made her the person she is today and guess what, you have her!
              Women were created from the rib of man to be beside him, not from his head to top him, nor from his feet to be trampled by him, but from under his arm to be protected by him, near to his heart to be loved by him.

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              • #8
                Like Cusp said, you've probably had sex with 3x as many women, so your question is pretty hypocritical.


                With that said, 10 partners at the age of 30 is NOTHING. Tons of women who attend 4 year colleges will have slept with more guys than that in those 4 years alone. My most recent girlfriend was 20 when we started dating, just finished her freshman year of college, and had already had 12 partners. And I wouldn't call her a slut.

                To be fair, when I heard 12 it really bothered me even though I've slept with at least twice as many women so I definitely see where your heads at. The psychology of men.
                Start 03/23/16
                BPEL: 7.5"
                MEG: 5.25"

                Current
                BPEL:
                MEG:


                Porn. Is. Evil.

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                • #9
                  So point I'm getting at with the above post. The context of the number is what's really important and the age of the person. So for her age and the context of it, meaning very emotional, no fuk buddies, or one night stands, only guys she can potentially see a future wit, makes it better

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                  • #10
                    Hey T you said he has her? Well it won't be for long if he keeps thinking this way.
                    The world's still a toy if you just stay a boy!

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Tara123 View Post
                      I hate this double standard society has, it's great
                      for men to have many partners but not women.
                      A key that can open many locks is a master key.

                      A lock that can be opened by many keys is a shitty lock.


                      Don't hate me Tara
                      Start 03/23/16
                      BPEL: 7.5"
                      MEG: 5.25"

                      Current
                      BPEL:
                      MEG:


                      Porn. Is. Evil.

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                      • #12
                        Rule # 1, never ask women about other men, either she will tell you a lie, or if she does tell you, you may not have wanted to hear it in the first place.

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Dongo View Post
                          Rule # 1, never ask women about other men, either she will tell you a lie, or if she does tell you, you may not have wanted to hear it in the first place.
                          I believe it's important to know for relationships. I'm not going to date a slut. And I wasn't going to ask her, but she said she asked a friend of hers what her number was and her friend who's only 23 has been with about 40-45. Which is just disgusting and she has a BF and the poor guy probably doesn't even know how easy and slutty she is.

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                          • #14
                            For a 25 year old, you sure seem to me to have a bunch of "old archaic notions" about sex. Your ego & immaturity are going to be your downfall in this relationship if you're not careful! NEVER ASK A PARTNER A QUESTION YOU'D BE EMBARRASSED TO ANSWER HONESTLY, TOO! It's a good rule to live by!

                            Ever see the movie "Moonstruck", where CHER SLAPS THE SHIT OUTTA THE GUY, THEN YELLS "SNAPOUTOFIT"!!!
                            ...YOU could use that, I think!
                            jockinthebox
                            Retired Moderator
                            Member of the Month May 2015
                            PEGym Hero
                            Last edited by jockinthebox; 08-16-2017, 01:18 PM.

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by jockinthebox View Post
                              For a 25 year old, you sure seem to me to have a bunch of "old archaic notions" about sex. Your ego & immaturity are going to be your downfall in this relationship if you're not careful! NEVER ASK A PARTNER A QUESTION YOU'D BE EMBARRASSED TO ANSWER HONESTLY, TOO! It's a good rule to live by!

                              Ever see the movie "Moonstruck", where CHER SLAPS THE SHIT OUTTA THE GUY, THEN YELLS "SNAPOUTOFIT"!!!
                              ...YOU could use that, I think!
                              Ego is certainly a problem, I can easily admit that. I didn't mind her asking me it. I told her the truth. She said she actually expected me to be with even more girls. She just laughed and said "well even tho you're a man whore i still think you're amazing" lol.

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