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Virginity importance of Long term partner/Wife

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  • Virginity importance of Long term partner/Wife

    In past centuries female virginity was very important in most countries especially when a man want to marry, she must still be a virgin, a girl, meaning no past single sexual experience.

    Nowadays things completely changed in most countries too, virginity is not that important even in many men view to their current long term(serious) partner and possible future wife due to more freedom for women and equality btw sexes.

    Despite change of time and mentality, still you can find girls who keep their virginity until marriage or/ until they find true love and they don't need to be the religious type, and they can reach their 20s like that.
    While many others just have sex starting as early as 15 just because it became as a social habit and who don't loose their virginity is pictured among friends and society as having some mental or/ physical problem so laughed at..some girls loose virginity just to appear ''normal'' in society terms, when being unique, respecting themselves and values will gain them more on the long run.

    There are scientific researches and statistics that say as many sexual partners a woman had, the higher possibility she'll divorce after marriage.

    This is also related to penis size fitting vagina and pleasure with first partner..etc

    Would like to read opinions of both sexes regarding this subject.

    Asking girls: do you reserve your virginity for true love/long term partner/husband?

    Asking men: do you prefer your Long term partner/Wife to be a virgin, and why Yes or no?

  • #2
    You have a point here Solving, in fact we can go as far as saying that it is not just a point, it is a truism. All factors being equal, the more the sexual partners a woman had, the less bonding effect she will possess. On the men's side, the more women a man did deeply fall in love with, the less the chance that he will bond well with a new partner.

    And to add on this virginity concept, in the past, women were groomed right from early childhood to learn certain mannerism and skills that do indeed, naturally, please men and help to keep a marriage and family unit intact. Among these skills and mannerisms are:
    - Ability to cook and serve routine meals on time and everyday
    - Ability to do routine chores including: washing dishes, washing clothes, cleaning the house
    - Skills on raising toddlers and even growing/grown up children
    - Proper relations to own family members and family of husband
    - Practical productive economic skills
    - Being polite and submissive
    - Being 100% faithful. Flirting with other men was considered being inappropriate and even unfaithful. Placing yourself in situations where unfaithfulness could occur e.g. private room with just your wife and another man and no one else was also considered inappropriate
    - Learning to dress

    Men on the other hand were taught skills, mannerisms and mentality that naturally are very pleasing to women and do help to keep the family unit intact. Among these are:
    1. Learning to provide for the family
    2. Learning self defense and ability to fight
    3. Being mentally tough, brave and to bear life burdens without shedding tears or bitching
    4. Ability to give women their space and time to hang out with other women. He was expected to seek out male partnership and not engage in women's gossips and conversations
    5. Learn skills that involve repairing/fixing things, building things, being good with technical problems and having technical know how on the prevailing technology
    6. Being decisive, consistent and resolved. He was taught to be a leader and possess leadership skills including charisma, confidence, tone of speech

    Now in our modern times, this has all been abandoned. There are 'men' nowadays whom, for a lack of a better word can be described as 'Pussies'. Naturally, these men are a big turn off to women. There are women too who, for a lack of a better word, are Sluts. Naturally these women make the worst wives.

    So in our times, a man who is confident and has character, can provide for the family and has leadership skills and isn't bitchy is naturally golden and a keeper. A woman who cooks and cleans up, is 100% faithful, is feminine loving and submissive, and is also beautiful is naturally golden and a keeper.
    A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle

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    • #3
      I would never want to marry a virgin nor should any man, I would say in my opinion.

      I would always be thinking are they wondering what else is out there.
      Women were created from the rib of man to be beside him, not from his head to top him, nor from his feet to be trampled by him, but from under his arm to be protected by him, near to his heart to be loved by him.

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      • #4
        Of course having a women having no sexual past would be better, but it's only better because we as men are insecure. There's no difference in a women having a sexual past than us men. Yes they would of encountered other penises to our unsatisifaction, but then on the other hand we would of encountered other women boobs and vaginas of all different sizes and looks aswell. Some women would be better in bed than other women. Some would have a better sized vagina etc. It's the same as us men. Some men are better in bed than other men.

        I have suffered anxiety about females past, but what's the point? It doesn't achieve nothing, it just destroys. I've also had comments from past partners asking me if I've had women that are tighter and were better in bed. It works both ways

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        • #5
          Originally posted by Tara123 View Post
          I would never want to marry a virgin nor should any man, I would say in my opinion.

          I would always be thinking are they wondering what else is out there.
          Thinking that very thought right now.
          A prayer, is kinda the same as a "Like". If there are enough likes, God will take notice. So "Like" away please. My daughter needs your prayers. Thank You.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by Tara123 View Post
            I would never want to marry a virgin nor should any man, I would say in my opinion.

            I would always be thinking are they wondering what else is out there.
            Yeah but don't forget some mens and womans are virgin because they are ugly.Personally,i am a virgin for things i don't have control in.
            Example,womans don't like ugly mans or short ones.
            Also lets don´t forget the double morality in the society.If a man is virgin,is weird.Is a woman is virgin is OK.Now,without going off topic,i think i wouldn't care if a gf is virgin.Is better and is a mind state knowing you are the first one,and you and she both,need to do the best to have a great time.
            Of course you are talking about long term,but i talk too both things.But,being how i am,i say i don't believe in that.I mean,long term.No,is dangerous.
            Look what said the_iron.Some points are very very hard.
            Faithful,loyalty,polite and all that.I pass.You know me,some of you,a little.I believe in self love,but in term of couples,NO.
            closed163
            Senior Member
            Last edited by closed163; 11-06-2017, 03:08 PM.

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Tara123 View Post
              I would never want to marry a virgin nor should any man, I would say in my opinion.

              I would always be thinking are they wondering what else is out there.
              Sara your opinion on "any man" is one which I cannot indulge. Given a choice between wifing up a slut verses a virgin all other factors equal, I would go for a virgin all the time. Given a choice between a woman who had one previous partner versus one who is still a virgin, all other factors equal, I still will go for the virgin.

              There is a magic https://www.pegym.com/forums/gym/114...ml#post1407310 that dies after a certain number of lovers - it simply turns from emotional love to logical compatibility.

              I would always be thinking are they wondering what else is out there
              This about here sums up what is wrong with out times. Lust is indeed winning over love.
              A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle

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              • #8
                What an interesting thread! I think OP hit it right on the head in his first paragraph discussing the historical view on sexual purity. What is interesting is that we are living in a paradigm shift as we speak. All sexual, social, political, and personal ideas we hold about ourselves and each other are exactly that: they are ideas, and they are constantly dissolving and re-forming. They are constructs that cannot be taken to be truths on an objective scale.

                For me, intimacy is a huge part of the connection with a woman. If a woman has no intimate experience, she is less attractive to me. I don't hold my first partner in high regard because she is not skilled intimately. I cannot forget, and constantly obsess over one of my more sexually active partners because we fit together sexually like two pieces of a puzzle. With regards to marriage, I've always thought of it like this: you wouldn't decide you wanted a certain car for the rest of your life, not having driven any other. Similar with religion, thought processes, location of residence, etc. Why should it be different with love? I know no data on the subject, but I can certainly imagine a virgin fantasizing about novel experiences that she could have had, had she not married. I know I have, and I'm single.

                In conclusion, I do not desire my future partner to be a virgin because virgins may not posses intimate abilities that I deem seductive in a woman. Any one person can attain mastery in any avenue of life; sex is no different. As it happens, I expect mastery out of both myself and my partner.
                "Can't is the cancer of happen."

                08/2015: BPEL 5.5-5.6", MSEG N/A (poor measurements)
                11/2017: BPEL 6.875", MSEG 4.8"
                Goal: NBPEL 7-7.5, MSEG 5.5"

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                • #9
                  I wouldn't want to marry a virgin, and I wouldn't want to marry a woman I hadn't had sex with beforehand either.
                  Feb. 2014 BPEL 6.8" Girth not measured

                  August 2015 BPEL 7.7" MG 5.1" BG 5.8"

                  Current NBPEL 7.5" EG 5.4"

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Purple Helmet Warrior View Post
                    What an interesting thread! I think OP hit it right on the head in his first paragraph discussing the historical view on sexual purity. What is interesting is that we are living in a paradigm shift as we speak. All sexual, social, political, and personal ideas we hold about ourselves and each other are exactly that: they are ideas, and they are constantly dissolving and re-forming. They are constructs that cannot be taken to be truths on an objective scale.

                    For me, intimacy is a huge part of the connection with a woman. If a woman has no intimate experience, she is less attractive to me. I don't hold my first partner in high regard because she is not skilled intimately. I cannot forget, and constantly obsess over one of my more sexually active partners because we fit together sexually like two pieces of a puzzle. With regards to marriage, I've always thought of it like this: you wouldn't decide you wanted a certain car for the rest of your life, not having driven any other. Similar with religion, thought processes, location of residence, etc. Why should it be different with love? I know no data on the subject, but I can certainly imagine a virgin fantasizing about novel experiences that she could have had, had she not married. I know I have, and I'm single.

                    In conclusion, I do not desire my future partner to be a virgin because virgins may not posses intimate abilities that I deem seductive in a woman. Any one person can attain mastery in any avenue of life; sex is no different. As it happens, I expect mastery out of both myself and my partner.
                    For me is better,i mean i wouldnt have any issue.Example,is she is a virgin,is more enjoyable,because you can control her in a good way.Also is more calm and sweet,because you can teach her a lot of things and laught with her,telling what to do what to not do.
                    Other example,lets supose your wife or gf doesn't have any skill in giving a handjob.Lets suposse that after 1 month of sex,she feels bad for not being able to do it right.That would be fine and funny,cuz you can teach her how to do it,give her personal tips,or show her how to do it and why,telling her too the differents parts and pleasure of the male member.Or better,how to grip to do a proper handjob,how to change the grip to change the timing.
                    Then,a couple of weeks later,she may feel more confident and may make you last 5 minutes only.
                    So,for me in terms of sex,a virgin is more enjoyable.After all,she can remember you as the partner who helped in a good way.Who knows.

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                    • #11
                      While doing some reading a few month ago, (I think in Mens Health), I came a cross a resent poll that showed in America, that women are now having more premarital sex than men. I'll have to see if I can find the article again.

                      As for myself I would not expect a women to be a virgin at the time of marriage, I wasn't. Although I would prefer not to have a gal that's been around enough that I'd feel like I was sleeping with Simon on a talent show. Seen it all, Done it all.
                      Unit
                      Retired Moderator
                      PEGym Hero
                      Last edited by Unit; 11-06-2017, 03:29 PM.
                      ​The enemy of good is not bad
                      The enemy of good is better

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Purple Helmet Warrior View Post
                        What an interesting thread! I think OP hit it right on the head in his first paragraph discussing the historical view on sexual purity. What is interesting is that we are living in a paradigm shift as we speak. All sexual, social, political, and personal ideas we hold about ourselves and each other are exactly that: they are ideas, and they are constantly dissolving and re-forming. They are constructs that cannot be taken to be truths on an objective scale.

                        For me, intimacy is a huge part of the connection with a woman. If a woman has no intimate experience, she is less attractive to me. I don't hold my first partner in high regard because she is not skilled intimately. I cannot forget, and constantly obsess over one of my more sexually active partners because we fit together sexually like two pieces of a puzzle. With regards to marriage, I've always thought of it like this: you wouldn't decide you wanted a certain car for the rest of your life, not having driven any other. Similar with religion, thought processes, location of residence, etc. Why should it be different with love? I know no data on the subject, but I can certainly imagine a virgin fantasizing about novel experiences that she could have had, had she not married. I know I have, and I'm single.

                        In conclusion, I do not desire my future partner to be a virgin because virgins may not posses intimate abilities that I deem seductive in a woman. Any one person can attain mastery in any avenue of life; sex is no different. As it happens, I expect mastery out of both myself and my partner.
                        Hey Purple, I like that you are logical, I regret that you are mistaken on the effect of previous lovers to long term relationships. Those that have had more previous partners are less likely to bond. Those that had previous partners are also more likely to fantasize on their previous partners. The implication of what I am saying is that, in the world and time that we live now, divorce is highest, as expected, among couples who married when they both had many previous partners.
                        A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle

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                        • #13
                          I feel reading a few of these posts that female virginity is seen as a 'prize' when its not.

                          It's a state - person before sex.

                          Being a virgin beforehand won't make you faithfully or eager to please etc. All those qualities depends on the person.

                          I stand by I would want the person I'm with to have had some life experiences under their belt before getting into a relationship with me.
                          Women were created from the rib of man to be beside him, not from his head to top him, nor from his feet to be trampled by him, but from under his arm to be protected by him, near to his heart to be loved by him.

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                          • #14
                            ​Is this thread just more confirmation bios for solving to feel good about being a virgin, or what?
                            Sex is the great leveler, taste the great divider. - Pauline Kael

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Tara123 View Post
                              I feel reading a few of these posts that female virginity is seen as a 'prize' when its not.

                              It's a state - person before sex.

                              Being a virgin beforehand won't make you faithfully or eager to please etc. All those qualities depends on the person.

                              I stand by I would want the person I'm with to have had some life experiences under their belt before getting into a relationship with me.
                              You make some valid points here. There is definitely some difference between the sexes. This I stated a while ago. Namely, A virgin man isn't necessarily a better man than a non virgin one - all other things equal. A virgin woman is necessarily better than a slutty woman, all other things equal. For men, and this is the difference, a man who has 'fallen in love deeply' with many previous partners is less likely to bond well with the new partner that he has met. So the difference is that in men, it is not just the past sex, but the past 'true love' that he had.

                              I said also that in the past days, unfaithfulness was ranked by more than just penis in vagina - flirting, dressing, placing yourself in compromising situations was also factored in. That is you are right that women with slutty personalities can in fact be virgins. Personally I have experience in this, where a woman, coming from a religion that still insists virginity at marriage, would allow me to do her anal but not virginal. She was still a virgin while she had slept with multiple guys already.

                              So yeah, virginity is a state and you are right to prefer men with experience - just don't project that, in a blanket fashion, to be the best choice for men too.
                              A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle

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