Ok let me start off by saying I do not post here a lot but I do read the forums a couple of times a weeks. Most of the time I see some pretty good replies to topics so I thought I would throw one out there.
I am not sure what I am looking for but its something that has being weighing heavy on my heart and mind. Anyway here we go.
I have been married to my wife for 11 years. We have two kids and I truly love my family. We never fight and get along just fine. However she never wants anything to do with me. I am lucky if we have sex once a month. Even asked for it for my birthday two weeks ago when she asked me what I wanted and needless to say all I got was a hat and hoodie. She never has contact with me and often gives me the evil eye if I touch her when she walks by. I find her attractive and will often grab her on the butt as she walks by or something but it drivers her crazy. She won't even sit beside me on the couch to watch TV.
If I go to bed early she stays up half the night to make sure I am a sleep. If I stay up late she runs in and goes to sleep before I can get to the bed. If I am awake and in the bed she will go into one of the kids rooms and tell me she fell asleep in there. Its always something. If I ask her to do out on a date she is always to tired and not up to it but if her parents or one of her buddies or the kids want something she has plenty of energy. She has a very easy job working only 4 days a week and only about 6 hours a day. I work 6 days a week and about 11 hours a day and I can still find time to do things.
Anyway for the past couple of years I have been up and down with this. Sometimes I am angry about it others times upset and sometimes I just laugh about it. She asked me why I was mad one day and I explained to her because she never had any time for me and told her how I felt. She told me she was sorry even cried a little and told me she would try to do better. Well for 3 whole days she did. We did not have sex once in those three days but she did at least sleep in our bed and not the kids and then boom right back to the same old thing again.
Now to the beef of the topic. I have really been thinking about getting the attention I need from someone else. I know once I do I can't take it back. I am not sure how I will feel if I go through with it. However how long is a guy suppose to go without? I feel like she is pushing me further away. I am a Christan man and feel that cheating is wrong but I am going over 5 years of this now. I have talked to her and that has not done any good only gotten worse. I don't want a divorce as with two kids child support would kill me plus I want to be around my kids everyday. However I stay unhappy because I feel like the dog is the only thing in the house that cares if I come home. It would be awful nice to have some attention every now and then.
Oh well thanks for your time in reading my post. I am not sure what I am looking for here. Someone to tell me its ok to cheat or someone to talk me out if it. I have an old high school flame that I am still in touch with and she ask me out about every week and its getting harder and harder to say no.
I look forward to your comments. (I think lol)
I am not sure what I am looking for but its something that has being weighing heavy on my heart and mind. Anyway here we go.
I have been married to my wife for 11 years. We have two kids and I truly love my family. We never fight and get along just fine. However she never wants anything to do with me. I am lucky if we have sex once a month. Even asked for it for my birthday two weeks ago when she asked me what I wanted and needless to say all I got was a hat and hoodie. She never has contact with me and often gives me the evil eye if I touch her when she walks by. I find her attractive and will often grab her on the butt as she walks by or something but it drivers her crazy. She won't even sit beside me on the couch to watch TV.
If I go to bed early she stays up half the night to make sure I am a sleep. If I stay up late she runs in and goes to sleep before I can get to the bed. If I am awake and in the bed she will go into one of the kids rooms and tell me she fell asleep in there. Its always something. If I ask her to do out on a date she is always to tired and not up to it but if her parents or one of her buddies or the kids want something she has plenty of energy. She has a very easy job working only 4 days a week and only about 6 hours a day. I work 6 days a week and about 11 hours a day and I can still find time to do things.
Anyway for the past couple of years I have been up and down with this. Sometimes I am angry about it others times upset and sometimes I just laugh about it. She asked me why I was mad one day and I explained to her because she never had any time for me and told her how I felt. She told me she was sorry even cried a little and told me she would try to do better. Well for 3 whole days she did. We did not have sex once in those three days but she did at least sleep in our bed and not the kids and then boom right back to the same old thing again.
Now to the beef of the topic. I have really been thinking about getting the attention I need from someone else. I know once I do I can't take it back. I am not sure how I will feel if I go through with it. However how long is a guy suppose to go without? I feel like she is pushing me further away. I am a Christan man and feel that cheating is wrong but I am going over 5 years of this now. I have talked to her and that has not done any good only gotten worse. I don't want a divorce as with two kids child support would kill me plus I want to be around my kids everyday. However I stay unhappy because I feel like the dog is the only thing in the house that cares if I come home. It would be awful nice to have some attention every now and then.
Oh well thanks for your time in reading my post. I am not sure what I am looking for here. Someone to tell me its ok to cheat or someone to talk me out if it. I have an old high school flame that I am still in touch with and she ask me out about every week and its getting harder and harder to say no.
I look forward to your comments. (I think lol)
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