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  • No sex while I have a roommate?

    So my girlfriend of nearly 3 years is refusing to have sex with me (even though we rarely had sex anyways. maybe once a month if Im lucky) as long as I have my roommate living with me. My roommate is my best friend that I had move in with me because we were both really struggling to make ends meet because we are both 21 and still in college. She says its too weird having someone else living there even though we used to all the time when she was living in an apartment with two other roommates. I feel like she is just punishing me for him living there because she doesn't really like him much. I'm considering telling her that if she wont have sex with me then we wont being going out to movies, restaurants, etc. until she changes her mind.

    I still care about her, but if she is going to act like this and it looks like we arent ever going to have a fulfilling sex life, then I'm not so sure that I want to be with her anymore. Opinions?

  • #2
    Ask her if she want to try threesome with your best friend ;p

    She might fall in love with that.

    No, I am just kidding.

    Maybe you can arrange with your buddy to have some "private time". So he won't be in the apt. while you bring your girl back.

    I feel uncomfortable too if there are other people around while having sex.
    AP90 member.

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    • #3
      Sounds to me like she needs to grow the hell up. Just because you live with your best buddy she decides to with hold sex? If it's just you and she in your room and he 's in his room, I don't see what the big deal is. Shut your door, keep the noise down and go for it.

      It's funny but they say that initially, girls mature faster than boys but then as we all turn into adults, that trend seems to reverse itself and more and more women become far more immature about that topic. Personally, if she's going to use sex as a weapon, because that's basically what she's doing, I'd dump her ass and find someone else. Acting like she is is really juvenile to me.
      It's a tough job being good looking and hung :-)

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      • #4
        Maybe you can arrange with your buddy to have some "private time". So he won't be in the apt. while you bring your girl back.

        We already have a lot of private time, my roommate is rarely ever there. Its more the fact that someone else is living there and that I dont have my own place anymore.

        Personally, if she's going to use sex as a weapon, because that's basically what she's doing, I'd dump her ass and find someone else.

        I think you nailed it. Last time we had sex was in November but before that the only time we would ever have sex was when I was sick of putting up with her shit so she would magically turn herself on to pacify me

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        • #5
          A girl who is GENUINELY into a guy, isn't going to use sex as a weapon or manipulation tool. From what you've said, it sounds like there's a little bit of both going on here...........which in my opinion is fucked up.

          Girls are a dime a dozen brother man and life is too damn short to put up with that kind of nonsense. It really depends on how much you really like this girl and how much you're really willing to tolerate.
          It's a tough job being good looking and hung :-)

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          • #6
            As long as you have a room and a locked door, it shouldn't be a problem.
            If it were me I'd either talk some sense in to her or dump her and find a girl that won't use sex as a weapon like MBD was saying.
            Goal: Huge

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            • #7
              Is your buddy respectful towards your girlfriend?
              ~ If.....
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              • #8
                Upgrade, man. Girls do this all the time. They don't like being alone so they'll hold onto you until they find another boyfriend. I know I'm generalizing but it does happen a lot. Before you start thinking that that would be too disrespectful to her, then I would say she is being waaaaaaaaaaaaaay too disrespectful to you. Man(I presume you two are young), you two should be at it like rabbits and she's not giving you any because of such a lame excuse!!!!!!!! Why doesn't she want to jump you? Has she a very low sex-drive? Have you been able to get her off? Maybe you two aren't compatible sexually. I don't know, maybe you should just be friends
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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Samurai View Post
                  Upgrade, man. Girls do this all the time. They don't like being alone so they'll hold onto you until they find another boyfriend. I know I'm generalizing but it does happen a lot. Before you start thinking that that would be too disrespectful to her, then I would say she is being waaaaaaaaaaaaaay too disrespectful to you. Man(I presume you two are young), you two should be at it like rabbits and she's not giving you any because of such a lame excuse!!!!!!!! Why doesn't she want to jump you? Has she a very low sex-drive? Have you been able to get her off? Maybe you two aren't compatible sexually. I don't know, maybe you should just be friends
                  I saw this happening a lot of time, but it isn't that much a girl thing only, men to that too.


                  About the topic problem, there is also a possibility that she is jealous or maybe even liking your roommate (it isn't his fault).

                  The fact that you have sex so rarely is more worrying to me. I mean, hardly once a month for a 3 years long relationship. It is ok if you are ok with that, but generally if the two of you where really hot for each other, you would need to find excuse not to have sex, not the other way around (in other words you should be all over each other).

                  Not to mention that she is totally inconsiderate towards your financial situation.

                  The best course of action (considering the comment you made about not being sure if you wanna stay with her) is to simply tell her what you want, and what will happen if you don't get what you want. Either there is sex, or there is no relationship. I don't like to sound typical, but you should not really waste much time on her, considering that she certanly isn't planing to waste much time with you.
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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by BuffaloSoldier03 View Post
                    Maybe you can arrange with your buddy to have some "private time". So he won't be in the apt. while you bring your girl back.

                    We already have a lot of private time, my roommate is rarely ever there. Its more the fact that someone else is living there and that I dont have my own place anymore.

                    Personally, if she's going to use sex as a weapon, because that's basically what she's doing, I'd dump her ass and find someone else.

                    I think you nailed it. Last time we had sex was in November but before that the only time we would ever have sex was when I was sick of putting up with her shit so she would magically turn herself on to pacify me
                    Wow... Time to rid of that girl dude. I know you care about her, but she's using sex to manipulate your mind... Trust me.

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                    • #11
                      Upgrade. Women are a dime a dozen. Nice responses.

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                      • #12
                        Seems like so pure immature garbage going on. Leave the ball in her court and let her figure out what she wants since, from what you've told us, she's pretty manipulative. And if it's been November (wtf?!?!?!?) since you last had sex, wow ... I'd think the writing's on the wall.
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                        • #13
                          I'm not shallow but if that were my girl, I'd be looking for a new one.

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                          • #14
                            Is your buddy respectful towards your girlfriend?

                            Yea he is very nice to her. And I dont think I have to worry about my gf being attracted to my roommate.

                            I actually reached the finally straw with her today. She is beyond pissed at me for picking up my friend's pregnant gf from the doctor because her appointment ran late and he had to go to work. Any good break up tips?

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by BuffaloSoldier03 View Post
                              Is your buddy respectful towards your girlfriend?

                              Yea he is very nice to her. And I dont think I have to worry about my gf being attracted to my roommate.

                              I actually reached the finally straw with her today. She is beyond pissed at me for picking up my friend's pregnant gf from the doctor because her appointment ran late and he had to go to work. Any good break up tips?
                              something like this is best sorted in your own mind mate
                              regardless i wouldnt want to be the cause to a break up by giving tips on how-to-dump
                              sorry to hear it went this bad...
                              waw
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