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Feel like I am losing my mind.
Hello! I'm a woman in my early 20's and I joined this forum because my boyfriend is very insecure and into penis enhancement. Lately, though, it seems that that's what defines our relationship talks day in and day out 
He is working at a monotonous job far away, and so I guess he feels he doesn;t have a lot to bring up. I always like hearing about him, and his day all the same because I feel i can find most anything interesting, and I because I love him a lot.
However, when he came into the relationship, he was already carrying baggage from past relationships where he was made to feel his genitals were severely inadequate. Understanding this, I still love him, and I do genuinely like his penis, but he seems to feel that if it's not the most amazing penis I've ever had that we'll stop having sex, and that he will lose me. For the last few months, he will bring up his insecurities in conversation almost no matter what we are talking about. I do my best to be supportive of him, but nothing I say seems to sink in, and when it does, it's because he perceived it negatively. Recently it had been happening in every single conversation, and it wore me down to the point that I did admit to him that no, I have not yet experienced an orgasm from him via penetration. I firmly believe that some day we can, and I genuinely enjoy his penis, but I know now that I have messed things up forever.
I'm truly afraid that this fighting and cycling of the subject of how he feels inadequate is all that our relationship will ever be. I'm so scared of saying anything further when it gets brought up because I go in trying to say everything with the best intentions and trying to avoid hurting him, but it still gets twisted or outright called a lie. I find myself going to bed crying at the end of most days because I feel like such an awful person, especially over his assertions that it is a problem with *him*. He thanked me for honesty, though let me know that he feels worthless; it breaks my heart because he felt worthless before the admission too. I assure him honestly at every chance I can that I do genuinely like his penis, that I do not think he is small, and that I do enjoy sex with him (he has certainly not been stingy giving me orgasms through other methods.)
He has been into PE before, and is starting himself up again on the lowest weights for hanging. (I believe he is also jelquing on a routine). I know that he pursues every resource he can because he wants to do it safe and well, and so I guess I'm not worried about getting PE advice for him. What I am worried about in the mean time is the obsession and how it affects both his and my mental health; I worry that this will never end, that he will never heal from past hurts, and I know that some of it is stuff that I just cannot help him with or heal for him.
He is working at a monotonous job far away, and so I guess he feels he doesn;t have a lot to bring up. I always like hearing about him, and his day all the same because I feel i can find most anything interesting, and I because I love him a lot.However, when he came into the relationship, he was already carrying baggage from past relationships where he was made to feel his genitals were severely inadequate. Understanding this, I still love him, and I do genuinely like his penis, but he seems to feel that if it's not the most amazing penis I've ever had that we'll stop having sex, and that he will lose me. For the last few months, he will bring up his insecurities in conversation almost no matter what we are talking about. I do my best to be supportive of him, but nothing I say seems to sink in, and when it does, it's because he perceived it negatively. Recently it had been happening in every single conversation, and it wore me down to the point that I did admit to him that no, I have not yet experienced an orgasm from him via penetration. I firmly believe that some day we can, and I genuinely enjoy his penis, but I know now that I have messed things up forever.
I'm truly afraid that this fighting and cycling of the subject of how he feels inadequate is all that our relationship will ever be. I'm so scared of saying anything further when it gets brought up because I go in trying to say everything with the best intentions and trying to avoid hurting him, but it still gets twisted or outright called a lie. I find myself going to bed crying at the end of most days because I feel like such an awful person, especially over his assertions that it is a problem with *him*. He thanked me for honesty, though let me know that he feels worthless; it breaks my heart because he felt worthless before the admission too. I assure him honestly at every chance I can that I do genuinely like his penis, that I do not think he is small, and that I do enjoy sex with him (he has certainly not been stingy giving me orgasms through other methods.)
He has been into PE before, and is starting himself up again on the lowest weights for hanging. (I believe he is also jelquing on a routine). I know that he pursues every resource he can because he wants to do it safe and well, and so I guess I'm not worried about getting PE advice for him. What I am worried about in the mean time is the obsession and how it affects both his and my mental health; I worry that this will never end, that he will never heal from past hurts, and I know that some of it is stuff that I just cannot help him with or heal for him.
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