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When it comes to sexual performance, why is almost all the presurre on the guy?

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  • When it comes to sexual performance, why is almost all the presurre on the guy?

    I hear a lot of women I know complain about how most guys are "generally bad at it" and "don't know what they're doing." I've even seen a recent article on social news site titled "straight men are officially the worst people in bed."

    Now I'm sure there are a good amount of dudes out there who could be better in the bedroom, but still, couldn't I easily make a similar generalizing statement about how a lot of women just sit there motionless and carry very little of the weight themselves?

    Seems like a big double standard.
    Vitex
    Senior Member
    Last edited by Vitex; 04-10-2019, 07:49 PM.

  • #2
    Men penetrate while women open up to receive (Literally and figuratively).
    Honestly, i think that's a bigger role as i wouldn't like to open up and recieve lol. Is there a general code to follow with women? I believe so, or else they wouldn't be talking about it with each other. And it's the mans role (masculine) to crack that code and get her to open up.
    May-18 : bpel 7.3/4 × EG 5.3/4
    July-20 : bpel 8.1/2 × EG 6.3/4

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    • #3
      I judge people who write articles like that. Probably some sort of snowflake that never gets sex and has given up but has a following of other snowflakes ready to take in any info without second guessing it. Hate it but thats the world we live in now. Like if 9 out of 10 people believe a lie then that 1 person is wrong to them.
      May-18 : bpel 7.3/4 × EG 5.3/4
      July-20 : bpel 8.1/2 × EG 6.3/4

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      • #4
        Originally posted by Vitex View Post
        Seems like a big double standard.
        I can see that. I wouldn't want it any other way. I don't know about you, but I really really get off when my wife orgasms. I like to say that her orgasms are my orgasms. There's this natural empathy or shared experience.

        https://www.sciencedaily.com/release...0702093052.htm

        https://youtu.be/sxwn1w7MJvk

        I could just go in, do my thing and move on, but, its just not as good...in fact it kind of sucks.

        Let me add, the the best thing my wife could do for our sex life is get off more. I dream that some day I could make her cum over and over.
        Dangler
        Senior Administrator
        ☼ Wizard ☼
        White Tiger Award 2015
        Last edited by Dangler; 05-14-2019, 12:30 PM.

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        • #5
          I think it's just stereotyping at its finest or worst kind of thing.

          Yes they will be people that don't click in bed, inexperienced people who need to learn and selfish people, we have probably all fell in to each category at some point.
          Women were created from the rib of man to be beside him, not from his head to top him, nor from his feet to be trampled by him, but from under his arm to be protected by him, near to his heart to be loved by him.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by Tara123 View Post
            I think it's just stereotyping at its finest or worst kind of thing.

            Yes they will be people that don't click in bed, inexperienced people who need to learn and selfish people, we have probably all fell in to each category at some point.
            I think there's a mindset or focus on pleasing each other....

            To please me though, she needs to focus on her pleasure. Its not like the sex isn't good when she doesn't, its just best when she does. Nothing is hotter than fucking her while she's writhing in ecstasy.

            I can see where the initial question posted can offend, as women go to great lengths to please. And we don't always appreciate it as we should.

            I guess its different for everyone.

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            • #7
              Ok, I didn't realize this was in the Women's Perspective forum. I clicked on the subject from the main latest posts area. Sorry. I'm not a woman. Go with what Tara123 said.

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              • #8
                Originally posted by Vitex View Post
                I hear a lot of women I know complain about how most guys are "generally bad at it" and "don't know what they're doing." I've even seen a recent article on social news site titled "straight men are officially the worst people in bed."

                Now I'm sure there are a good amount of dudes out there who could be better in the bedroom, but still, couldn't I easily make a similar generalizing statement about how a lot of women just sit there motionless and carry very little of the weight themselves?

                Seems like a big double standard.
                I agree.
                Lot of women just lie there and make no attempt tp work with you .
                Women seem to complain they want longer sex but many can't handle it when they get it . Don't know what to say and technique meh .

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                • #9
                  Its part of being a man I guess.
                  Personally, I find it very inappropriate and sickening when during social gatherings woman and man talk about their sexual encounters or when they are being descriptive whether its bragging or bashing about someone they had sex with.

                  What happens in the bed (so to speak, could be anywhere else) stays in the bed. At least for me.
                  There is a difference between knowing the path and walking the path.

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                  • #10
                    It does actually come down to men doesn't it? lol I think we are just happy to be having sex and enjoy it anyway but girls are after the perfect sex when most of them don't even try to please.

                    I think men are more judgmental when it comes to blowjobs. I've heard guys say she was shit or good at sucking but never shit at having sex.
                    Start: BPEL - 7.008", MEG - 5.197"
                    Current: BPEL - 7.126", MEG - 5.118"

                    Goal: BPEL - 9", MEG - 6.5"

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                    • #11
                      It is a double standard and yes it's stupid.

                      Both men and women will try to find a way to shame you for everything in life, even if you were actually successful in what you did. It's best to not listen to them and do your own thing with pride and purpose.

                      Btw I remember reading somewhere that gay men had the most satisfied sex lives, straight people in between, and lesbians were the least satisfied. But it's just something I read.
                      Start: 8.25 BPEL, 5.2 MEG, 6.4 Base Girth, 9 BPFSL

                      9/11/17: 8.5 BPEL, 5.25 MEG, 6.5 Base Girth, 9 BPFSL 7.75 NBPEL*

                      10/7/17 (EQ increased): 8.5 BPEL, 5.5 MEG, 6.4 Base Girth, 9 BPFSL, 7.75 NBPEL

                      11/17/17: 8.75 BPEL, 5.5 MEG, 9.25 BPFSL, 8 NBPEL

                      2/9/19: Same as 11/17/17

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                      • #12
                        I think that women don't realize that if they are good looking, then it makes it harder for a guy to hold on. To say guys can't fuck as a general statement negates the receiving end to the encounter. If a women tries her hardest to look hot, then yes, it makes it harder for a man to hold on. Simple stuff if you ask me. What gets me is those that complain about stamina and just sit there with their legs in the air and contribute nothing to the experience. In my opinion, a girl should be thrilled that she got a guy off quickly - that is the point of sex, to get off. I know from a male standpoint, I always leave an encounter making sure she got off. Porn has really fucked things up for all of us.

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Trax2Brax View Post
                          It is a double standard and yes it's stupid.

                          Both men and women will try to find a way to shame you for everything in life, even if you were actually successful in what you did. It's best to not listen to them and do your own thing with pride and purpose.

                          Btw I remember reading somewhere that gay men had the most satisfied sex lives, straight people in between, and lesbians were the least satisfied. But it's just something I read.
                          Funny I read a study that said lesbians had the best sex lives, gay men the most promiscuous and hetero the worst lol
                          Women were created from the rib of man to be beside him, not from his head to top him, nor from his feet to be trampled by him, but from under his arm to be protected by him, near to his heart to be loved by him.

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Tara123 View Post
                            Funny I read a study that said lesbians had the best sex lives, gay men the most promiscuous and hetero the worst lol
                            Id agree with that too. Ugh. I’ve been terrible in bed for so many years. Not sure why she stayed with me, maybe since we were both virgins. Ignorant about each other’s needs. She claims she always got off when we were young....BS of course.
                            ‘Making up for lost time, and her orgasms now....and yes, she much louder than in our twenties.

                            And. Yes. It was my fault back then
                            A prayer, is kinda the same as a "Like". If there are enough likes, God will take notice. So "Like" away please. My daughter needs your prayers. Thank You.

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                            • #15
                              Damnit!
                              I have to become gay in order to be able to have a "good sex life"...
                              Sigh, I have a lot of work to do. Sucks to be normal. * cough* Excuse me, I meant hetero.

                              More seriously, that double standard is a thing and imo its just part of life. A man's gotta be able to deliver.
                              I completely agree with you @TheZZMan, the sexier the woman looks or behaves, the harder it is to hold on haha. Pretty sad that they see early ejaculation poorly and blame us for it. It means they are really hot to us, its kind of a compliment lol. I dont know, maybe for them its a kind of weakness, just like confessing feelings. Maybe it makes them think they are too good for that man?
                              There is a difference between knowing the path and walking the path.

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