For the Ladies -- What is an average partner count these days anyhow, esp in mid 20s?

[Phoenix7672 Senior Member Member of the Month Oct 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Phoenix7672]

Just something that has been eating my mind the last week or so. Talking to a friend (who I potentially want to be FWB with), and she admitted she's been with 12 guys while she was between the ages of 20-25. I haven't been that lucky in the sex department thus far in life, so my number is much, much, much lower.

I did a quick Google, and it seems average partner count is about 3-7 for that age. Granted, big difference if you were lucky in love and found someone early on or only went through a few relationships before finding the one vs being single through your 20s, so I'm not sure how accurate those numbers would be.

Anyhow, I'm just wondering what numbers others have, especially when they were around that age. End of day, I don't think it is the number that really bugs me...but more the disparity in experience between the two of us, should anything happen. Also if 12 in such a short time is a red flag I should consider.

[BigO AdministratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close BigO]

If she started having sex at 16 or 17 that is only a few guys a year, considering any attractive girl could have had dozens if she wanted I don't see an issue with the amount of partners.

If you like her go for it and enjoy the time you have with her, maybe you will be her last.

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

Umm I would not ask women they tend to understate. I think you can assume the number is larger tan commonly believed.

[Phoenix7672 Senior Member Member of the Month Oct 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Phoenix7672]

If she started having sex at 16 or 17 that is only a few guys a year, considering any attractive girl could have had dozens if she wanted I don't see an issue with the amount of partners.

If you like her go for it and enjoy the time you have with her, maybe you will be her last.

She started at either 20 or 21 (I can't remember what she said) and is 25 now...so all 12 are in that 5 year or less span. We also aren't looking for the same things long term, so this would just be something casual vs something long term.

I understand the understating as well...which is why if she had said 5 then maybe the number would actually be closer to 10...but since she said 12, then maybe it is closer to 20 (again, in a 5 year or less span).

Honestly though, I don't know much about non-prudish girls when it comes to sex, so I have no idea what 'normal' numbers would be for someone in their 20s who hasn't been in relationships (she hasn't wanted them either). She's also pretty much as far from un-prudish as they come (we've been friends for a year, and 8-9 times out of 10 every other conversation takes on some sort of sexual twist at some point, typically as some sort of joke).

[someone_like_u Retired ModeratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close someone_like_u]

Hey Phoenix I wouldn't worry so much about the numbers, esp. if you and her are thinking of a FWB thing. I think it's more to do with the experience gap as you stated above. I know women who have crazy high numbers but, knowing them personally, I know that they don't just go out and hook up with randoms. And at the other end of the spectrum, I know women, including myself, who have lucked up with finding that one partner for life.

If you like the girl and she likes you, go have fun!

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

I remember a friend of mine was very active over a 2 year period . She later said she had about 20 partners lifetime .
I reminded her that I had known her very well and we had talked extensively over that period. She said so what . I said you commonly had a guy every week and sometimes more . She said yes so what . I said 1 a week for 2 years is 100 and you most certainly would have exceeded 50 . She groaned and said nothing . I suspect if I had been a girl I would have said 20 no way it's that many.
Girls understate for a reason ,it freaks men out and makes them go all weird with pseudo religious "morality" .
Men got to get used to the idea women have sex too.

[BigO AdministratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close BigO]

If I ever end up single I don't think I would care about the next girls numbers. If she was good to me they would not matter. It just better stay at 1 as long as she is with me!

[Phoenix7672 Senior Member Member of the Month Oct 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Phoenix7672]

Hey Phoenix I wouldn't worry so much about the numbers, esp. if you and her are thinking of a FWB thing. I think it's more to do with the experience gap as you stated above. I know women who have crazy high numbers but, knowing them personally, I know that they don't just go out and hook up with randoms. And at the other end of the spectrum, I know women, including myself, who have lucked up with finding that one partner for life.

If you like the girl and she likes you, go have fun!

From my understanding, she went through a bad period and that's where most of the numbers came from. She also doesn't seem into ONS which is good (those still don't fully sit right with me), so they came from either flings or other FWBs. Also bugs me she doesn't care for condoms (didn't know there were girls legitimately like that), but if anything happens I'd definitely be using them or it's a no-go for me.

Dunno, I guess we'll see what happens over time. FWB is also uncharted territory for me as I've been open to it the last while, but none of the girls I know are, or are in long term relationships/married, so are off the table so to speak. I guess I'm just worried too that if I did start things up with her, she'd be the only one I'd be with...but she might be with another number of guys during the same time.

[643dp Member Find all posts View Profile Close 643dp]

...Also bugs me she doesn't care for condoms (didn't know there were girls legitimately like that), but if anything happens I'd definitely be using them or it's a no-go for me.

...I guess I'm just worried too that if I did start things up with her, she'd be the only one I'd be with...but she might be with another number of guys during the same time.

I'm not trying to distort your words, but I edited it down to the parts that stuck out for me. Those statements make it seem like being with her, even if you use protection, would be risky. If not for that, I wouldn't worry too much about the numbers. But knowing that someone has a penchant for unprotected sex while racking up the numbers, makes me think something else might be going on with them. Man or woman.

[CUSP82 Administrator Admin of the Month Dec 2014PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close CUSP82]

I always wondered what the magic cutoff number was for a good girl/bad girl! 5? 7? 62? Can someone help me out with it and while you're at it explain why that number?

[mikecares Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close mikecares]

Don't ask if you can't handle it. If she's attractive and goes out frequently, chances are her numbers are more then 10. Ive been with girls who've had over 50 to girls who've been with 1-2 guys. Its not a big deal if you have some experience but I can why it would drive some guys ape shit. Girls can get sex whenever and however they want, just remember that.

I'd say for a Western girl between ages 20-25 that goes out frequently, her count would be between 10-20. If she's a homebody, probably less then 5.

[Party Senior Member Member of the Month August 2016 Find all posts View Profile Close Party]

I always wondered what the magic cutoff number was for a good girl/bad girl! 5? 7? 62? Can someone help me out with it and while you're at it explain why that number?

19 and a 1/2. I'm the 1/2.

[Phoenix7672 Senior Member Member of the Month Oct 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Phoenix7672]

Don't ask if you can't handle it. If she's attractive and goes out frequently, chances are her numbers are more then 10. Ive been with girls who've had over 50 to girls who've been with 1-2 guys. Its not a big deal if you have some experience but I can why it would drive some guys ape shit. Girls can get sex whenever and however they want, just remember that.

I'd say for a Western girl between ages 20-25 that goes out frequently, her count would be between 10-20. If she's a homebody, probably less then 5.

I did the math as well, and had I taken up every opportunity plus managed to sleep with all the girls I had wanted to, my count would be about 17-20 right now, but sadly that's not the actual case.

I'm not trying to distort your words, but I edited it down to the parts that stuck out for me. Those statements make it seem like being with her, even if you use protection, would be risky. If not for that, I wouldn't worry too much about the numbers. But knowing that someone has a penchant for unprotected sex while racking up the numbers, makes me think something else might be going on with them. Man or woman.

I know...and that is one red flag for me as well. I wish she wasn't that way, but part of me thinks so long as I always use protection, then my bases are pretty much covered. My hopes would also be that if things did pan out she wouldn't be out looking for much (unless the guy of her dreams came along). I know she also does not want kids, ever, plus if I use protection and some guy slips up, then essentially I know it isn't me (and if required, paternity tests could prove that as well). Her family is also very well off, so I know money isn't a potential issue as well.

[akaTrex Senior Member Member of the Month Jan 2016 Find all posts View Profile Close akaTrex]

Food for thought . . . I knew a Great Gal and could not understand her Promiscuity in her youth.

Then someone recommended I read: Loose Girl: A Memoir Of Promiscuity

Kerry Cohen is only 11 years old when she recognizes the power of her female form in the leer of a grown man. Her parents are recently divorced, and it doesn't take long before their lassitude and Kerry's desire to stand out, to be memorable in some way, combine to lead her down a path she senses she shouldn't take. Kerry wanted attention, and she wanted love. Vulnerable and adrift, she turned to sex instead.Loose Girl is Kerry's captivating memoir about her descent into promiscuity and how she gradually found her way toward real intimacy. It's a story of addiction - not just to sex but to male attention, how she came to believe boys and men could fill her emptiness, and how she tried to control them by handing over her body.

From the early rush of exploration, when her virginity was technically still intact, to the day she learned to quiet the desperation and allow herself to be loved, Kerry's story is never less than riveting. In rich and immediate detail, Loose Girl re-creates what it feels like to be in that desperate moment, when the touch of a boy seems to offer proof of something - of being worthwhile, of being loved - but ultimately delivers little more than emptiness.

Kerry's journey from that hopeless place to her current confident, happy existence is a cautionary tale and a revelation for girls both young and old.

[Phoenix7672 Senior Member Member of the Month Oct 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Phoenix7672]

AkaTrex that sounds a lot like this one too. She was hurt and said she went through a rough patch with a lot of guys trying to feel something. She said she's slowed down now, but likes sex and since she isn't looking for a relationship at all, she just wants casual and fun at this point in her life....which after being hurt multiple times myself, and choosing to be single the last few years, is all I am really looking for right now as well (although I still do hold out hope for meeting the girl of my dreams, and a 'normal' life, some day).